Never Alone For Very Long
by Whovian overload River Song
Summary: One drunk night somehow changes their entire lives. Yet another one of my fics about River and the Doctor starting a family. Except I wrote this with someone else and it's much longer and way more epic. There are many encounters with the Silence as well as many adorable scenes, quite a bit of angst, and everything you expect when you're a Time Lord family who the universe hates
1. Giving you the chance

[A/N: Please know that this was not written alone. I wrote it with a friend named Bea

Bea and I literally spent over five months writing this and are still going. Yes, it will be very long, but it's exciting and emotions and things. Anyway, huge thanks to obsessedsoul ( ) for a whole lot of inspiration and also letting me use the baby name they came up with. You should totally read their stories, they are amazing! Also thank gingerbritishgypsyelf ( ) for inspiration as well. Obviously, the writing improves more as you read it.

Lastly (Just so you know) I was the one writing the Doctor and Bea was the one writing River. We both shared writing the other characters.]

Ch 1  
River stumbled through the doors of a familiar blue ship. Maybe she shouldn't have had that last glass of wine at the after party, but she was competing against Jack Harkness after all. If she had lost, she would have never heard the end of it. River was proud at her self for out drinking him, but in fairness, he did die a few times of alcohol poisoning. She walked in grabbing onto the railing to walk up to the console platform. She tripped over something she couldn't see, which was likely her own two feet, and ended up sprawled on the floor, her wrist as a funny angle. She attempted to get up but searing pain started to radiate from her wrist. "Doctor," she called out, not really knowing if he was even in the TARDIS. Foot steps could be heard coming up the stairs from under the console.  
The Doctor was still wearing his ridiculous goggles as he rushed over to her. "River! What happened?"  
She let out a very un-River like giggle when she saw him in his goggles. "Doctor, what are you wearing?" She asked, her words slurring together due to the fact that she was highly intoxicated at the moment.  
"They're my work goggles" He said, a little taken back. "River are... are you drunk?"  
"No, silly, I'm not drunk. I'm absolutely, positively, completely sober." She smiled up at him, then tried to push herself to her feet again, wincing as she put weight on her wrist again.  
"No, you are absolutely, positively, completely drunk." He looked her up and down. "What happened to your wrist?"  
She frowned slightly, rubbing her aching wrist, "I fell on it, but I'm fine." She lied, "And I already told you, I'm not drunk. I don't get drunk."  
"Sure you don't." He decided it best not to argue with her. "Here sit down" He tried to guide her to the pilot seat.  
"I'm fine, I'm fine." She insisted, stumbling away from him. "Let's go somewhere."  
"No. You need to sit, and I need to take a look at your wrist." He insisted. She rolled her eyes.  
"Fine." She grumbled, sitting down in the pilot seat. He delicately cupped her wrist in his hand, staring at it intently. She squirmed uncomfortably in the seat, watching him examine her wrist which was already starting to bruise pretty badly.  
"You've broken your wrist, River. Did you hurt anything else when you fell?" He asked concerned, pulling out his sonic.  
"I don't think so, maybe...I don't know." She sighed, trying to push the sonic away from her with her good hand.  
"Hey. River I'm using this to fix you. I think I have a bone setting on here somewhere"  
"No, I'm fine. It doesn't need to be fixed." She tried pulling her wrist away from him, looking away. "I don't want you fixing my problems."  
"It's not a problem. It's an actual, physical.. thing!" She was so hard to work with drunk. "You broke your wrist. Like... bones! I have to heal that"  
"No, you don't. I don't want you to, I'm fine." She stood up, swaying a bit. He quickly took hold of her shoulders, steadying her.  
"You want to walk around all night with a throbbing pain in your wrist? And don't say it doesn't hurt, because I know it does no matter how much you can hide your pain"  
"I don't want you to fix it with that." She frowned, nodding towards the sonic, "It will hurt if you try and fix it. Besides, it will heal on it's own eventually." He grumbled. He was never going to win this.  
"Will you at least let me put a cast on it? If it's going to heal on its own, it needs a cast."  
"Am I making you cross with me?" She asked quietly, disregarding his request to put a cast on her wrist.  
"No, River. Not at all." He gave a weak smile. "I care about you and I just want you to be safe. It's just a bit hard to ensure that when you resist my help" He admitted.  
"I'm sorry, I'm such a disappointment to you." She whispered, looking down at her feet. She didn't drink or get drunk very often, and it was obviously wreaking havoc on her brain.  
"Oh, River. You're not a disappointment to me." He stepped closer wanting nothing more than to just hold her in his arms. "Far from it. You are the best thing that's happened in my life." He liked to try his best to avoid fighting with her when she was drunk, mostly because of how quickly the mood could change.  
"But I'm not letting you help me." She sniffed, standing still so he could hold her, "And I always let you down, especially now." He pulled her into his arms, rubbing her back.  
"Now? You aren't letting me down. You don't want to be fixed. I should respect your wishes, and not force you to do anything you don't want to."  
"I don't want to be a burden on you." She wrapped her good arm around his neck, gripping onto him tightly, "I don't want to disappoint you."  
"You are anything but a disappointment, River. You are a privilege to have in my life. I'm so glad I have that privilege" He smiled into her blonde curls.  
"But I am a disappointment, you just don't know because I just never told you that I had a miscarriage." She blurted out, her grip on him tightening.  
His face fell. "A... miscarriage?." He tried to avoid River when she was drunk because of spoilers like these, but they were both married at this point so there weren't many spoilers left. He held her closer, like something bad would happen if he let go. "Oh River. It wasn't your fault. Nothing that happened was your fault. You're not a disappointment and don't you ever think for a second that you are." She wanted to cry, but held back her tears, not wanting to upset him by crying.  
"I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry."  
"It's okay, River. Don't blame yourself." He choked back tears of him own. "I'm the one who should be saying that to you, anyhow" He tried to lighten the mood  
"Why would you ever think that?" She asked, blinking back tears.  
"You went thought that on your own. How long ago was it, River? You had a miscarriage without telling me and you had to deal with those emotions on your own until now. I'm sorry that you had to go through all of this. I'm sorry"  
"It's alright." She whispered, "It wasn't your fault you weren't there, I don't blame you. It was almost a month ago. I was planning on telling you I was pregnant, but I never got the chance." He pulled away from her to look at her face.  
"Then how about I give you the chance? Let's try for a baby" He said with a hint of excitement in his tone. She stared at him for a moment, trying to process what he had just said,  
"What?"  
"A baby, River." A grin crept onto his face. "I mean, why not? We'd be brilliant parents!"  
"Do you really think so? Don't you think this is a bit impulsive?" She asked, her eyes wide.  
"Not at all. We've been married for ages, it's about time we start a family of our own, yeah?"  
She started to smile, "I'd love to start a family of our own." He beamed, pulling her lips to his in a passionate kiss. She practically melted against him, her fingers running through his hair. He placed a hand on her hip, holding her close. He ended the kiss, taking her by the good hand and giving a small pull towards the bedroom.  
"Come on" She smiled as she gripped onto his hand, letting him lead her to the bedroom.

River pressed her forehead against his chin, trying to catch her breath as she lay beneath him. He rolled on to his back, a smile on his face. "Do you think it worked this time?"  
"I hope so." She smiled, curling up against him, "But even if it didn't, I wouldn't mind trying again."  
"Neither would I." He wore a goofy grin on his face. "Still don't want a cast?"  
"I don't need one, I'm fine." She lied, pressing a light kiss to his chest.  
"If you say so..." He said, wrapping his arms around her waist. "What do you think our child will be like, River?"  
"I don't know..." She murmured, "But I hope our baby will be just as loving and kind as you."  
He pressed a kiss to her cheek. "Thank you darling." He thought a moment. "If it's a girl. I want them to have your curls."  
"Which would you want?" She asked, smiling softly "A girl or a boy?"  
"At the moment, a girl. I can't imagine anything but a miniature you running around the TARDIS."  
She laughed, "A miniature me? Are you sure you want another me running around?"  
"Yes. You're wonderful and I can't get enough of you" He laughed  
"Oh, stop it." She smiled, her cheeks flushing light pink.  
"Never." He loved making her flustered since it was a rare occasion that she was the one who was blushing and not him.  
She giggled, "Really? Never?"  
"Not ever" He confirmed, nuzzling his face in to her neck.  
"Well, I think I could get used to that." She grinned.  
"How long do we have to wait to find out?"  
"I don't know, a few days maybe? Probably a week."  
He groaned. "That's too long if you ask me"  
"I'm sorry, sweetie." She smiled, knowing how impatient he was. She kissed the tip of his nose in attempt to stop him from pouting. He was too excited not to smile. He beamed at her, throwing his arms around her happily.  
"We're going to be parents!"  
She laughed, hugging him tightly, "Don't get too excited, I said we'll have to do a test in a few days to be absolutely positive."  
"And I'm sure it will be." His cheeks hurt from smiling so much, but he couldn't stop. Her smile faltered, her happiness suddenly deflating.  
"W-what. What is it, River?" He asked, very concerned.  
"What if I have another miscarriage?" She asked, "What if something happens and I lose the baby?"  
He rubbed her shoulder to sooth her. "Then we try again. But that won't happen this time. This time it'll work"  
She blinked back the tears that had formed rather quickly, "I hope you're right."  
"Trust me. It'll all work out. I promise" He hugged her tight. "It'll be okay"  
"I'm going to get huge." She quickly changed the subject, not wanting to dwell on it any longer.  
He hummed. "I can't wait."  
"You can't? I'm not so sure you're going to be happy about saying that in a few months."  
"Just because you may not be looking forwards to it, doesn't mean it can't."  
She sighed, "You're right. And gaining all that weight will be worth it."  
"Absolutely." They stayed up for a little while talking about what it would be like when the baby came, before they drifted off the sleep.  
A week passed quicker than the Doctor expected. He waited outside the bathroom that River had disappeared into a few minutes ago with the pregnancy test. River opened the door to the bathroom, looking disappointed and quickly wrapped her arms around him, seeking comfort.  
"Negative?" He expected he was right but wanted to hear it from her.  
A smile began to spread across her face as she shook her head. She had only been playing with him. "Positive. I'm pregnant."  
He giggled. "What'd I tell you. I told you it'd work" He lifted her up and spun her around. "We're going to be parents!"  
She laughed as he lifted her up and spun her, "We're going to be parents." She echoed, smiling up at him.  
"Our impossible child" He set her down, pressing a palm to her stomach. "How's that wrist of yours?"  
"It's still sore." She covered his hand with her good one, sugar-coating how she really felt.  
It probably wasn't even worth it to ask, but he did any way. "And you're still refusing a cast?"  
She sighed, "Doctor, I've already told you I don't need a cast."  
"Doesn't hurt to ask" He kissed her on the top of the head. "Come on. I want to check something"  
"Check what?" She asked.  
"Everything!" He said excitedly, dragging her to the console room. "Scan: River Song" He ordered the TARDIS. She smiled, her excitement matching his as she stood still, letting the TARDIS scan her over. He watched the screen intently as data appeared on it:  
River Song/Melody Pond: Fetus detected- Full Time Lord.  
Gestation period, eight months.  
One week pregnant  
She stared up at the screen, still in a mix of shock and happiness.  
"Probably should've mentioned that Time Lord pregnancies are shorter than human's."  
She shrugged, "The shorter the better I suppose."  
"Yes." He gazed down at her. "You are a wondrous thing, River Song"  
"I'm glad you think so." She beamed up at him.  
"Any morning sickness yet?"  
"Not yet, thankfully. But it's only been a week."  
"Well I hope you like saltines. It will be just about the only thing you'll be able to keep down"  
She frowned, "Wonderful, I'm certainly not looking forward to that."  
"I'm sure you can handle it" He assured her "You can do just about anything." He bopped her on the nose.  
She smiled weakly, her nose scrunching up as he bopped it. "Thank you."


	2. Our Little Song

Ch 2  
It wasn't but a week later that the Doctor was holding back River's curls from getting any vomit on them. She groaned she finally finished throwing up into the toilet, her stomach still churning. He handed her a glass of water as she straightened herself up. "Feeling better?" He asked. She took a sip, then shook her head, pushing the glass back to him before turning and vomiting once more. He sighed, hating to see her like this. Again, he pulled back her golden hair. She dry heaved, coughing before standing up once again. "Don't stand too fast darling, you'll get dizzy" He told her. She put a hand to her head which felt like it was spinning.  
"Alright, alright." She waved him off. He stood up next to her, placing a hand on her shoulder to steady her.  
"Good?"  
She shook her head, "I think I need to sit for a minute." He supported her arms and sat her down on the side of the tub. "Can I have some more water?"  
"Of course." He handed the glass back to her. "Good news is that the sickness should only last a couple more weeks." He hoped that would make her feel at least a bit better.  
She took another sip of her water, "That's good to hear." She forced a smile.  
"Do you want something to eat?" He put a hand on her back.  
She nodded, "But I don't know if I'll be able to keep anything down."  
"You could always try. But you don't have to if you dont want to"  
"Well I'm starving, so I'll try anything."  
"Be right back" The Doctor disappeared into the other room and came back a moment later with saltines in his hands. She groaned, nearly vomiting at the sight of them.  
"Not quite ready yet?" He could help but grin a little.  
"Why are you grinning?" She asked, glaring at him.  
"You look to cute when you're sick" He sat back next to her. "In fact, you look cute all the time"  
"Do I?" She tried to hide her smile, resting her head against his shoulder.  
"Yes. Yes you do" He smiled.  
"Thank you." She murmured. He leaned his head on hers.  
"It's get better. I promise"  
"I trust you." She sighed, closing her eyes.

The morning sickness cleared up three weeks later. River had a small but noticeable bump by then that the Doctor often liked talking to. River loved when the Doctor talked to the baby, though she would never tell him. It made her heart swell to think about him being a parent. They were in the library. Well, River was. The Doctor had walked in. He didn't want to disturb her reading, but he did want to say hi to her belly. He sat down next to her, leaning his head in close. "Hello baby" He whispered. She peered over the top of her book, looking down at him.  
"What do you think you're doing?" She asked. He sat up suddenly, rubbing the back of his head.  
"Well I.. er... um.. wanted to say hello" He admitted.  
"You already said hello three times today, sweetie." She smiled, running a hand over her belly.  
"Yeah, but you get to spend all day with them" He pointed out. "I don't, see, I think I have the right"  
She rolled her eyes, pretending to be annoyed, "Fine, go on then."  
He grinned clapping his hands together. He lifted her shirt up enough to expose the small bump of her belly. "Hello, there. When you come out would you like a fez or a stetson?"  
"Doctor, if you're going to ask questions like that then I'm never going to let you talk to the baby again." She threatened, although she was smiling wildly.  
"What- But I-... fine" He grumbled. "Than what SHOULD I say if you're going to dictate what I can say."  
"I'm only joking, no need to get snippy with me." She huffed, crossing her arms.  
"Sorry." He apologized quickly, fiddling with his fingers. "Er.. River. Do we want to find out the sex now or do we want it to be a surprise?"  
"I don't care." She looked away from him, still sounding rather annoyed at him.  
"Could we find out?" He asked hopefully.  
"Fine." She grumbled.  
"Come one then" He lightly pulled on her arm to get her up. She pushed herself up, fixing her shirt and following him. They went over to the med bay. The Doctor went over to retrieve the ultrasound machine while River hopped up on the table. She adjusted herself on the table, her hand resting on her belly. He brought it over, holding up a bottle of blue gel. "This may me cold" He said before squirting it onto her belly. She shivered as he squirted the gel on her stomach. He took the wand and maneuvered it around while starting at the screen. He clicked a few buttons before freezing an image and turning it so River could see. She began to smile, her eyes lighting up as she saw their baby for the first time. He pointed. "There's our daughter" He beamed.  
"Daughter?" Her smile grew as she looked from him back to the screen, "She's beautiful."  
"I suppose that means we should start thinking of names.  
She nodded, "Do you have any ideas?"  
"I was always partial to the name Freya" He told her.  
"That's a beautiful name." She smiled, "I love it."  
"Our little Freya Song. It's perfect"  
She beamed, "Do you want to say hello to Freya?"  
"Of course." He wiped the gel off before giving a kiss to the exposed skin. "Hello Freya. I hope you're having a nice time in there, we can't wait for you to arrive"  
"Happy?" She asked, practically glowing the excitement herself.  
"Extremely" He planted a final kiss to her belly before putting her shirt back in place. "Right, how about some lunch then? Anything in mind?"  
She nodded, "I've actually really been craving sausages and mint ice cream."  
He scrunched his nose. Why would she want want something as disgusting as- oh right. Cravings. "Sure thing, dear" He went over to the kitchen to prepare what she wanted and some eggs for himself. She followed him to the kitchen, not wanting to stay in the med bay alone.  
"Do you need any help?" She asked.  
"No no" He said, handing her a bowl of ice cream. "You eat this while I make your sausage"  
"Thank you." She smiled, taking the bowl from him and watching him cook the sausages as she ate. The smell of the sizzling sausage soon filled the room.  
"There we go. All done" He presented the plate to her.  
"Mmm, it smells delicious." She took the plate from him, dumping the remainder of her ice cream onto the sausages before beginning to eat them.  
He grimaced. "I can believe you actually enjoy that"  
She frowned, "Well it's not my fault."  
"'Course not" He snickered. "But for someone who think fish fingers and custard is disgusting..."  
"Don't laugh!" She pouted, flicking a bit of ice cream at him.  
"Hey!" He wiped it off his check. "I'm not laughing. I just think it's a bit funny" He grinned.  
"It's not funny!" She protested, taking another spoonful of her ice cream and flinging it at him.  
"Okay! Okay!" He admitted defeat. "Just please stop throwing ice cream it me, this is a new jacket."  
"Alright, fine." She sighed, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing a kiss to his lips. He hummed.  
"Did you enjoy your..." He didn't exactly know what to call the mash of sausage and ice cream on her plate. "...lunch?"  
"It was wonderful until you started making fun of me."  
"I was just kidding." He places a kiss on the top of her nose.  
"Well you hurt my feelings." She pouted, pretending to be upset with him.  
"Sorry" He apologized. "Anything I can do to make it up to you?"  
She thought for a moment, a smile creeping onto her face, "Well, my back has been awfully sore lately..."  
"Would you like me to massage it?" He was glad she did make him do something like eat the weird sausage-ice-cream-thing.  
She nodded, "Yes, that would be lovely." He lead her back to the library and sat her down in the couch. He sat down next to her and began rubbing the base of her back in small circles. She hummed happily, closing her eyes.  
"I suppose I be doing this a lot."  
She smiled, "Yes you will."  
He leaned forwards to kiss her cheek. "And I'll enjoy every last second"  
She laughed, "So will I."


	3. A 'Normal' Date Night

**Ch 3**

Back rubs became a routine in their everyday lives. Generally they happened before bed, but if she really need he'd do it thought out the day. Her belly kept growing from the small bump it was to looking like she'd swallowed a soccer ball. 'A planet' as the Doctor liked to say. He was happy that the due date was moving closer, but also anxious. Mostly because there so many people out there who'd love to their hands on his family. He never let her leave without a perception filter on and always stayed close by her. River scowled when he gave her the perception filter to put on, "If you're going to make me wear this, then I'd rather just not go out." She huffed, in a bit of a sour mood tonight.

"River, you _know_ that we can't have anyone finding out about our baby. That means you've got to wear it if you want to go out." He eyed her large midsection, feeling very protective at the moment.

"Well then I don't want to go out. I'm tired of having to wear it." She waddled over to the bed, sitting down with another huff.

He placed the filter back on the dresser. "Sorry, you feel that way. You know its only for your own protection" He didn't mind staying in. It meant that the risk of her being taken was gone, but he hated seeing her upset. She sighed, looking down at the nice dress she had barely managed to fit into.

"Well, how would you feel if you had to wear a perception filter every time you wanted to leave the TARDIS?"

"Well... to be honest, I'd question if what I was hiding was worth it." He placed a hand on her bump. "And it definitely is"

She smiled weakly, "I suppose you're right." She murmured, placing her hand over his.

"Still want to stay in? Because it took me awhile to get the dinner reservations. The people of Odio are so.. so.. suborn"

"Let's go out then." She tried to push herself up, struggling to get to her feet on her own. He offered a hand out to help her. She took his hand, managing to get to her feet with his help.

"There we are. Come along Song" He lead her by the arm, grabbing the perception filter of the dresser and placing it on her neck as they left. She smiled, following after him. They strolled out the TARDIS doors on to a stone path. It seemed to be a garden of some sort that lead to a glowing building. People of all races walked in and out of the doors.

"Where are we again?" She asked, looking at the garden around them.

"This is the planet Kodeni and this city is called Odio. That restaurant is known for a splendid roast shepuni" He said excitedly.

She smiled, "It sounds lovely." He beamed, continuing on the path. He started to ramble a bit about the place, the origins of the people and when he had been here before, things like that. She nodded and smiled as they made their way down to the restaurant. River stopped walking, her hand moving to her stomach and she held tightly onto his arm.

"...River" He paused too. It always made him nervous when she did that.

"She's kicking." She smiled up at him, her hand still resting on her belly. He smiled in relief.

"You've got to stop scaring me like that." He placed a hand where hers was. He jumped a little in excitement, pulling his hand away with a small giggle before putting it back "That's brilliant"

"I'm sorry, it surprised me, that's all." She smiled up at him, giggling as she felt another kick, "Did you feel that one?"

"Strong kicker." He commented. "Come on." They resumed their walking, still mesmerized by their child's movements. She was glowing as she walked along side him, smiling radiantly.

"Reservation for two" He told the waiter who lead them to a private table on a balcony.

"Would you like a wine?" The Doctor always found it a little amusing that no one else could see the large bump of River's belly. He politely declined.

"It's beautiful up here." She mused, happy to be somewhere private. "Doctor, there's nobody around, can I please take this off?" She asked, her toying with the perception filter around her neck. He thought a long moment. He didn't want to deny her the right to take it off, but he was also very cautious.

"...Okay" He said slowly. "But you have to be ready to put it back on if you even hear someone coming"

"Thank you." She murmured, pressing a kiss to his hand before taking off the filter. He beamed at the sight of her. The candle on the table illuminated her curls.

"If there weren't so many people out to get us, I'd take you all over the universe to show you off" He said out loud. She laughed, her cheeks tingeing pink.

"That's very sweet."

He blushed. "I said that out loud?"

"Yes you did." She laughed, "Are you blushing?"

"No" He lied, his face turning even redder. He tried to hide behind the menu. "I'm absolutely not blushing."

"I think you absolutely are." She giggled, reaching across the table and trying to move the menu away from his face. "And I also think that it's absolutely adorable." He obliged, pulling the menu down.

"Maybe a little" He was embarrassed, but he enjoyed this as much as she did. Her belly got in the way of her leaning over any further, so she stood moving so she could place a kiss to his cheek, then his lips.

He chuckled at the touch of her lips, kissing her back. The waiter soon returned to take their orders. She sat back down in her chair, forgetting that she had taken off the perception filter.

"River!" He whispers loudly , wide eyed. "The filter!" Her eyes grew wide and she quickly found the filter, putting it back on. He turned to the waiter, his face falling when he saw the waiters shocked expression. "Um.." He didn't know what to say. The first thing that popped into his mind was that he could be working for Kovarian. In a flash, he jumped up and pinned the man against the wall, holding his collar tightly. "Who do you work for?!"

"Doctor!" River stood, moving as quickly as her body would allow, trying to pull him off the other man. "Doctor, stop it!"

"But what if he works for the Silence?" He hissed. "We can't take that risk, River. I need to keep you safe"

"He could be perfectly innocent." She tugged on his arm again, "Please, let's just go back to the TARDIS."

"And if he's not? What then? Then he reports back to Kovarian and we're dead. I'm not going to let that happen. I'm not going to let her take you away again." She swallowed, not having any response for that. She had ruined their evening with her selfishness. He pushed the man again. "I say again" His tone was cold. "Who do you work for?" After getting out of him that he had never even heard about a Kovarian the Doctor said "If you let slip what you've seen here, I will find you. You saw nothing, we were never here" And with that he and River left. It was obvious that River was upset as they walked back to the TARDIS and as soon as they were back inside she took off the perception filter and threw it across the room. "River... It's not your fault. Nothing that happened tonight was your fault."

"Don't be ridiculous, all of it was my fault. I was the one who wanted to take off the stupid filter, and then I forgot to put it back on. You warned me and I messed it all up. I put myself and the baby in danger." She hid her face in her hands. He came over to her, wrapping his arms around her.

"But we're safe now, River. He wasn't working for anyone. It's okay now"

She pushed him away from her, "But our night is ruined. We practically terrorized that poor man, and after that who says he won't go and tell someone." He looked a little taken back. He stared at his feet.

"You're right. we should be more careful." He looked up at her. "I'm sorry that our evening got ruined, but that doesn't matter to me. What matters is that you're safe for now. You and our daughter are safe"

"We don't know that now, and it's all my fault." Her whole body was aching, and her head was spinning.

"No one can get into the TARDIS, so we do know that. You're safe in here." His face grew fearful as he saw her sway dizzily. "River?" He reached an arm out to steady her. His voice sounded far away from her and her legs gave out from beneath her, her eyes fluttering shut as she collapsed.


	4. Hello Again For the First Time

**Ch 4**

"River!" He caught her before she could hit the ground. His hearts raced as he lifted her up and sprinted to the medbay. She remained unresponsive to him as he ran to the medbay, her breathing a bit heavier than normal. "No, no no!" He set her down on the bed, hooking her up to machines to tell him any data that it could about her condition. She gasped, trying to get more air than she was getting at the moment. "River? Come on! Don't do this to me!" He looked around for anything to help and found an oxygen mask. "Here" He put the mask over her face. After a few minutes with the oxygen mask on her breathing began to normalize again. A few of the machines he had hooked her up to started beeping with results. He looked at them intently, nodded, understanding. He stroked the top of her head. "River..?"

She groaned, her eyes fluttering open, "Doctor?" She asked hoarsely, "What happened?" He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank god..." He looked back on the screen. "It looks like you suffered some sort of stress related thing. That combined with the pregnancy caused, well... this." He gestured to all of her. He took her hand, kissing it and then kissing her forehead again. "Don't ever do that to me again"

She smiled weakly, squeezing his hand, "I'm sorry, sweetie. I promise I'll try and keep it from happening again." To be truthful, she didn't remember much of what had just happened, or how she had gotten into the medbay, but she didn't want to alarm the Doctor any more.

"I'm not taking any chances. It's bed rest for you, River." He said in a demanding but not forceful tone.

She shook her head, trying to sit herself up, "No, Doctor, I'm fine. I don't need to go on bed rest."

"Yes. Yes you do." He put his hands on her shoulders. "That was a strong reaction to stress and your body is fragile now. This will probably happen every time you get that stressed. It's too dangerous. And it's only for a few weeks until the baby's born" He added.

She tried to push his hands off her shoulders, "I refuse to sit around in bed and do nothing for the next few weeks. I won't let myself get stressed again, I promise. Everything will be fine."

"Please, River? If not for me then for our baby? Please." He begged her.

"I don't need to go on bed rest, sweetie." She hated when he used the baby against her like this, making her feel selfish. He gave her a pleading look, but he could never win an argument with River even if she wasn't pregnant.

"You'll be very careful then?"

"Of course I will. I'm always careful." She looked away from him, not wanting to give into his pouting, "I promise."

"Okay then. I trust you." He pulled her towards him for a kiss. He didn't know what he'd do if he ever lost them. Even knowing that the library was still yet to some was a painful thought. He was glad, though, that in this moment, he had his family right there with him.

She kissed him softly, then wrapped her arms around him for a kiss, nuzzling her nose into his neck, "I'll make you a deal, if it happens again, then you can put me on bed rest, alright?"

"Deal" He smiled against her lips.

She let out a little gasp, pulling away from him, her hands covering her stomach, "I think she's doing somersaults in there." He put his hand in her belly. He could feel the movement of their child and let out a little giggle.

"She's just as excited as we are."

She grinned, her hands resting beside his, "I can't wait until I can hold her in my arms." "Neither can I. But I do enjoy this bit, too. She's nice and safe in there."

She nodded, "I'd like to think so." He smiled again, giving her another kiss.

"You know, we never did get to eat and I make a pretty good steak"

She smiled up at him, "Do you really? Steak sounds amazing right now."

"Come on then." He look her by the hand and lead her to the kitchen. The TARDIS often redesigned rooms and this time designed the kitchen to look like a restaurant.

She looked around at the kitchen, a bit amazed, "It looks lovely in here."

"It looks like we get out date after all" He grinned. "How do you want your steak?"

"Mmm rare." It wasn't what she normally would have requested, but her cravings had been getting the best of her and the more she thought about a juicy rare stake, the hungrier she got.

"Coming right up. The TARDIS should have them already prepared." He dashed into the other room coming back a moment later, hands full of steaming food. He licked his lips, setting the food down in front of her.

She took in a deep breath, humming hungrily, "This smells amazing."

"Only the best for you, dear." He reached for the fork and knife to begin cutting the meat.

She rolled her eyes, but laughed, "Oh, shut up." She smiled, taking a bitt of her steak. They spent the evening laughing and talking over dinner and enjoyed a lovely red velvet cake for dessert. "Doctor, do we have a room for the baby?" She asked, stealing a piece of his cake. A part of her had been looking forward to decorating the baby's room, but she figured the TARDIS would just do it for them.

"Um.. I don't know." he thought a moment. "I'm mean, the TARDIS would probably have one ready but..." He looked at her. ".. I was sort of thinking it would be nice to make it our selves. Like they do on earth"

Her eyes lit up, "I was thinking the same thing. It would be wonderful! We could pick out colors for the walls, all the furniture, and all the decorations." She was excited already.

"Really?" He perked up "I thought you'd say no." He glanced at his watch. "I think we should start tomorrow though. It's a bit late and you need your sleep"

Her excited expression fell, "But I don't want to wait until tomorrow." She pouted, looking up at him with wide, slightly disappointed eyes since that usually seemed to work on him.

He bit his lip. "Okay" But smiled, secretly just as excited as she was. "What color should we make it?"

She beamed, happiness quickly flooding her expression again, "Oh, I don't know...What do you think?"

"I'm always for blue. Color of the universe. A perfect fit for our little Timelord. Well, Timelady. Well, Timebaby" He corrected himself.

"I think blue is a beautiful color." She looked down at her belly, "What do you think Freya, hmm? Would you like your room to be blue?" A little foot shape bump appeared when Freya kicked and the Doctor giggled at River's shocked face. "I'll take that as a yes." She laughed a little, smiling up at him, "Doctor, come here and ask her another question." He got up, and knelled next to her chair, resting his hand on her belly.

"Freya.." He thought of a question. "What do you think of your name? Do you like it?"

She laughed as she felt another strong kick, "Did you feel that one?" She asked, smiling down at him.

"Yes" He grinned, keeping his hand on the spot where the tiny foot just poked. "It's amazing really, human babies don't have this kind of telepathic connection with their parents." He planted a kiss on her belly "I bet you that if you used thoughts instead of words, she could too."

"Really? You mean we could actually talk to her?" She asked, her hand resting on his. "Well...how do I do it?"

"Well, if there's a telepathic connection, which there is, you should be able to feel it. It's not that obvious, just like a warm spot in the back of you mind. Can you feel it?" She stayed quiet for a moment, looking very focused.

"I feel it." She murmured, finally finding it in the back of her mind.

"Now it's pretty simple. You just direct your thoughts there. It might take a few tries, but she'll respond." She closed her eyes, her brow furrowed in concentration as she tried to direct her thoughts.

"It's not working, I can't do it." She said after several minutes, looking at him, very frustrated that she couldn't figure it out. He took her hands.

"You _can _do it. Try again" He instructed her. She held onto his hands tightly as she closed her eyes again, trying to really concentrate on what she was doing.

_Mum? Oh good! I was wondering when you would figure that out. _

She opened her eyes, a bit surprised even though she had been waiting for it. When it didn't work the first few times, she had started to doubt it would work at all. "I can hear her..." She whispered in amazement. He beamed.

"I told you it'd work. What did she say?"

"She said she was wondering when I would figure it out." She smiled, "She knew who I was...she knew I was her mum. Can you talk to her too?" He shook his head.

"It's more of a skin to skin contact sort of thing. That's why she heard me when I spoke out loud, but I couldn't hear her because it wasn't direct."

She nodded slowly, "Well, if she can hear you, then you could talk to her and I could tell you what she says." She offered, wanting him to be able to share in her experience.

"Right then" He looked as if he were about to start taking to Freya, but stopped. "River, what do I even say to her? I mean, she doesn't really know me as much as you. What if she doesn't like me?"

"Oh, sweetie..." She murmured, stroking his cheek softly, "She's going to love you, and how could she not? You're a wonderful husband, and I know you'll be an even better father." She gave him an encouraging smile, "You can tell her how excited you are to meet her, or how much you love her already...You can do it."

Taking comfort in her words, he took a breath and began to speak. "Erm.. Hello, Freya. I'm your father, the Doctor. I hope you're cozy in there because you've only got a few weeks left until we finally get to meet you. I hope you're as excited as we are."

She kissed his forehead, "That was perfect." She murmured, closing her eyes so she could concentrate on Freya.

_You don't need an introduction, silly! I hear you everyday and I love these stories you tell. My favorite was, what was it called... oh! The Three Sleepy Daleks! That's the one. I can't wait to come out, too. It's getting a little cramped in here. _

River beamed down at the Doctor, repeating Freya's words to him. "I told you that you had nothing to worry about."

"Well, I just thought.. I don't know what I was thinking. You were right as usual" He rubbed the back of his head.

She chuckled, leaning back in her chair, "I'm always right, sweetie."

"How about that nursery then? Or are we putting that of for later"

"We might need to put that off for later now." She yawned, "I'm feeling quite sleepy now." He tried his best not to show his satisfaction of her willing to go to bed.

"Tomorrow then." He offered a hand to help her out of the chair She took his hand, pulling herself up and rubbing her aching back.

"Don't look so smug." She noticed how satisfied he looked, despite his attempt to hide it.

"I don't know what you're talking about" He teased, putting a hand on the small of her back and beginning to walk to the bedroom.

"Didn't anyone tell you it's not very nice to tease your pregnant wife?" She walked with him towards their bedroom.

"Yes, but it's ever so fun" He bopped her on the nose, setting her down in the bed "And you love it"

"Oh, you're so mean to me." She pretended to look upset, finding it quite difficult to hide her smile.

"No I'm not. That hardly even counted as an insult." He waltzed over to the dresser, a smile on his face as he changed into his pajamas.

She huffed, "Freya agrees that you're being mean."

"No fair! You can't use the baby against me. That's cheating."

"It's not cheating, it's being resourceful." She smiled, confident that she had the upper hand, "And what do you have to say to that?" He sighed not wanting get into an argument even if it was just play.

"I say that you are very, very clever" He slipped under the covers next to her.

"So that means I win?" She curled up against him, "And I think the winner deserves a kiss."

"Yes you win" He said, kissing her along the neck up to her lips. "Mm, you are beautiful, you know that?"

"Am I?" She murmured, her eyes had fluttered shut when he kissed along her neck, loving when he did that, "I hadn't noticed."

"You, River Song" He said between kisses. "Are the most gorgeous person in the universe"

She hummed appreciatively, quite liking all kisses, "I'm glad you think so." She purred.

"I know so" He snuggled close to her, wrapping his arms around her waist and pressing his chest to her back. It was a perfect moment: His wife in his arms, his child moving under his fingertips. He couldn't be happier

She sighed contently, perfectly happy to remain this way forever. She eventually drifted off to sleep, only to awake a few hours later, sweating and gasping to catch her breath, still caught up in her nightmare.


	5. But Only For a Little While

**Ch 5**

The Doctor was immediately rubbing her shoulders and asking what was wrong. Him being full Time Lord meant that he didn't really sleep that often and woke easily when he did sleep. "River..?"

"Sorry, I just...had a nightmare." She breathed, her head in her hands. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" He knew that getting panicked could be dangerous for her. "Do you want to talk about it?" She was close to hyperventilating, her heart pounding. She opened her mouth to say something, but she was too worked up to get anything out. He stared at her, wide eyed, before pulling her into him arms and holding tightly "River, you need to stay calm. Just, breath, calm down."

Her breathing became less harsh as he held her to him, starting to calm down. He didn't know what she dreamed about, but he had a good guess. "It's okay. I'm here. You're safe now. It was just a dream. You're okay." He comforted her. Her bottom lip trembled, the overwhelming urge to cry threatening to take over. The only time she ever really, truly cried in front of him was after nightmares like these. She held onto him tightly, a bit soothed by his words. He stroked the back of her hair and kept whispering in to her ear that she was safe until she stopped trembling, which was at least a good ten minutes. She closed her eyes, still clutching onto him. Her breathing was finally normal again, and her body was less tense, but she refused to let go of him. "Are you ready to talk about it?" He asked carefully.

"Madame Kovarian kidnapped me, and she took Freya away..." She took a deep breath to keep herself from panicking again, reminding herself that it was only a dream, "I couldn't save her...I couldn't save our baby."

Just as he thought, "Sh, it's okay. She's right here" He took her hand, bringing it down to rest on the swell of her belly. "See? She's safe. You're both safe" Her hand was frozen on her belly, waiting to feel the baby's kicks.

Her panic began to rise all over again when she didn't feel anything, "Doctor, she's not kicking, why isn't she kicking?" His hearts started to beat faster a her words.

"Maybe she's asleep..? He didn't want to believe that there was anything wrong with their baby.

"Try talking to her!" She tried to focus, but her head was spinning and her heart pounding. She couldn't seem to find the right place to direct her thoughts. "River this is important, you have to focus" He put his fingers to her temples. "Focus"

She tried to concentrate, repeating the same thing over and over again in her mind, _Please be alright, Freya. Oh god...please be alright, my love. _She couldn't find the warm spot in the back of her mind. The Doctor was searching her mind as well, trying to find the connection.

Like River, he couldn't find it. "We need to get you to the medbay. Now" He picked her up in one swift move, sprinting to the other room even though he knew she could walk just fine.

She blinked back tears, terrified that their baby wasn't going to be okay, "Am I having another miscarriage?" She asked quietly, though she knew he probably didn't know any more than she did. He was whipping out the ultrasound and putting the probe on her belly. He barely registered the question.

"It's too late in the pregnancy for it to count, _if_ it is a miscarriage, it would qualify as preterm labor." He spoke quickly, making sure emphasize the 'if'. He stared at the screen, pressing a few buttons to display data. He looked at her, exhaling. "She's alive."

She stared at him, "Is there something wrong with her? Why isn't she moving? Why couldn't I find the connection anymore? What's going on?" She slammed him with questions, desperate to know what was going on.

He titled the screen to her so she could see. "See there?" There was a whole lot of data on the screen. Things saying how far along she was, the baby's heart beats and such, and at the bottom in parentheses was the word: protected. "Freya, she's a Time Lord. In the womb, Time Lords have basically an unlimited supply of regeneration energy, but if something happens, they don't regenerate like we would. She's made, a sort of… shield around herself. She's perfectly fine, not harm done, but the telepathic connection was severed. She's sealed off from the outside world, which is why she didn't have a reaction to your touches."

"So… I won't feel her anymore?" She asked. Her gaze shifted away from him, "What caused her to seal herself off? What did I do?" She was talking more to herself than she was to him, upset with herself.

He looked at her sorrowfully, "It's nothing you did, River. It... It was the nightmares." He didn't want to admit that. "That fear, that _stress,_ it stays with you. Even when you're awake." He bit his lip, not really knowing what to say to her. She looked so sad. She had only found out that she could talk her her yesterday. "It'll go away once she's born. And that's only a few weeks away..." She was happy that the baby was alright, but devastated that she was shielded. The amazing connection she had just found out about was now cut off which was very disappointing. And now she didn't even have the advantage that normal human mothers had, getting to feel her daughter kicking. All the little movements that had made her heart flutter were gone, and she'd feel nothing for the next few weeks. Of course she still blamed herself, she always blamed herself, the had been her nightmare's after all. Her heart was utterly broken, but she did her best not to let it show.

"I'm sorry..." She whispered.

"It's okay. Everything will be okay" Since she was already in a bed, he lay down next to her, wrapping his arms around her like he did before. He could practically feel her sorrow which just made him more empathetic to her. "She'll be with us soon. I promise" She nodded, though it didn't make her feel much better.

"I'm _so_ sorry..." She whispered again, she had not only done this to herself, but to him too. Now he wouldn't be able to talk to Freya, or feel her kicks which River knew he loved.

"It's not your fault, River." He said softly, planting a kiss behind her ear. His hand moved to trace small circles on her belly. "She's still here. She's still with us"

"Can she still hear us talking?" She asked, though she could already guess the answer. He hesitated, not wanting to tell her the truth, but knowing he couldn't lie.

"No. I'm sorry" That set her over the edge and she began to cry, having held it all in up until now. She covered her face with her hands, her shoulders shaking as muffled sobs could be heard from behind her hands. He hated to see her cry. More than anything in the world, mostly because he could do almost nothing about it. But he tried his best, wrapped his arms around her tighter, letting the tears fall. She cried until her chest hurt, eventually having no tears left to shed. She lay completely still in his arms, staring at the wall. Just a few hours ago, every bit of her had been glowing with happiness, now that was all gone. "River..." He didn't dare try to say anything while she was crying, and now there was nothing really to say. They weren't going to feel their baby's movements until she was born. They weren't even going to be able to talk to her. "If it makes you feel any better, the telepathic connection will come back when you're in labor."

"But that doesn't make up for all the time we won't get to have now." She murmured, "I know you say it wasn't my fault, but it _is_ my fault. If I hadn't been having those stupid nightmares..."

'If there's any one to blame, it's the Silence. They're the ones causing the nightmares." She nodded, sitting up and moving to get out of bed. It must have been the middle of the night, but she couldn't sleep. No, she refused to sleep. She never wanted to sleep again. Sleeping was what had caused this situation, now she would never do it again. He reached out for her arm "Where are you going?"

She shook him off of her, "Anywhere but here." He got up, moving to her side.

"I'm coming, too." She walked out of the room and down the hall, opening the door to her "secret room." The room was empty except for a rocking chair, with a book on it. For the past few months she had gone into this room to be alone and read to Freya. She had no idea if the Doctor knew about this room, but she had been planning on showing it to him, thinking it would be perfect for the new nursery. Now, after what had happened, she wasn't so sure if she wanted to make it anymore. "River, what is this place?" He asked, looking around, and taking note that is was a perfect size for a nursery.

She shrugged, "Just an empty room."

"Not empty" He looked towards the chair and book. "You've been here before"

She picked up the book, hugging it to her chest so he couldn't see it. "Maybe..."

"You've been reading to her." It wasn't hard for him to put two and two together. He smiled ever so slightly, thinking that was very sweet.

She almost smiled, holding the book a bit tighter, "Well I guess I can't do it anymore."

"You can once she's born." He didn't want her getting sad again. "And that's very soon."

She nodded slowly, "I suppose you're right." She sat down in the rocking chair, her hand running along her belly absentmindedly. He stood behind her with his hands on her shoulders and kissed the top of her head.

"You tired?" She shook her head, even though she was. She would push herself to complete exhaustion if it meant she didn't have to sleep again. "River.." He stepped so her was facing her. "I can see the rings under your eyes"

"I'm not tired." She insisted, "And you can't make me go to bed if I don't want to."

"No, but I can bring you a blanket and pillow and turn out the lights."

"If you do that then I'll just leave and go somewhere else." She crossed her arms.

"Sweetie, what you do doesn't just affect you. It affects our baby, too. As much as I'd hate it if you went a night without sleep, it's not just you I'm worried about."

"Why don't you just come out and say that I'm being selfish? I know exactly what I'm doing. You said that she was shielded and that nothing can harm her. So what does it matter what I do now?" He sighed, bending down in front of her. He took her hands, holding them much like he did when comforting Amy.

"You're not being selfish. I know exactly why you don't want to sleep. If I were in your position, I'd do the same thing. But you need you sleep to be healthy, to be strong. You need to sleep. Please?" She looked away from him, his words tugging at her heart.

"I'm not tired." She said firmly, she didn't mean to be difficult, she was just upset and afraid of something else horrible happening while she was sleeping. "The rings under my eyes are just from stress." She could be so difficult sometimes.

"All the more reason." He paused before leaving the room and coming back with a pillow and blanket. He put the items next to the chair. "I'm not going to force you to sleep, but those are there if you want. Would you like me to stay?" She nodded slowly, the blanket and pillow both looking very tempting. She was still holding the book she had been reading to the baby. She opened the book, reading silently trying to keep herself awake. He eyed the book. "Would you like me to read it to you?"

She bit her lip, staring at him for a moment, "Alright." She whispered, handing him the book. He examined the page she was on. It wasn't that far into the book, about of the third of the way in. He immediately recognized the words. It was a novel about a Time Lord and his TARDIS. He smiled.

"The man ran his hands over the console and smiled. It was nothing like he had ever experienced before, a whole new universe just waiting for him." She smiled weakly, finding his voice very soothing. She closed her eyes, listening to him read, sinking deeper and deeper into the rocking chair. He glanced up from the book every so often, each time seeing her eyes a little more closed than they were before. He continued along through the chapter of when he visited the planet Forbesi when he looked up to see her fully asleep.

A few minutes after she had fallen asleep, she began fidgeting and mumbled, quite obviously having another nightmare. He was watching her intently. At the first signs of her nightmare, he woke her, not wanting her to experience the whole thing. She gasped as she awoke, her eyes darting around the room for any sign of danger, still not completely aware that it had just been a dream. He held her shoulders firmly. "River. It's me, you're okay." Her gaze fell on him, her eyes wide and fearful. She blinked a few times, finally realizing what had happened.

"I told you I didn't want to go back to sleep." She muttered, burying her face in her hands.

"I-I know. I'm sorry..." He felt terrible "River... There must be something causing your nightmare. I'm mean, they shouldn't be the only thing that happens when you sleep."

"It's alright." She whispered, looking back up at him, "I don't know what's causing them..."

"I can't have you having nightmares forever. We've got to fix it now." He placed his fingers on her temples. "May I?" She shied away from him, not exactly wanting him in her head. He took his hands away. "I won't if you don't want me to." He fidgeted with his hands, trying to think of another way to stop the nightmares. She shook her head, knowing he was worried about her and wanted to get it over with.

"Fine, fine. But be careful of spoilers."

"I'll do my best." He gently placed his fingers back and slowly entered her mind. He had done this before with other people, but some how this felt different. He felt like he was intruding. He looked around, searching for anything. He filed through the mess of thoughts and memories before he found her nightmare. She didn't like him in her head, trying to shut him out of most of her thoughts. She could sense him going through her mind, squirming uncomfortably when he found her nightmares. "Sorry" He apologized but continued, skimming through the horrific images of Kovarian and the Silence. They made him want to cry. He couldn't believe that she had had to relive this every time she went to sleep. He began blocking it of from the rest of her mind. Putting a wall around it so she couldn't access it.

"What are you doing?" She asked quietly as she slowly began to forget her horrific nightmares.

"Remember when I told you about Donna? It's the same. I was able to block that part your mind from accessing the dreams, so you won't have them anymore." He withdrew his mind from hers, as he finished the presses. "There"

"I wish we had done this earlier." She murmured, thinking that if it had been done sooner, then they would still be able to feel the baby.

"Better late then never." He smiled. "All better?"

She nodded, wrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him tightly, "Thank you." He smiled, putting his arms around her waist and pulling her to standing. He could feel her already heavy with sleep so he just lifted her up and carried her to their bed. She fell asleep in his arms as he carried her back, sighing against his chest, her head tucked beneath his chin. He beamed down at her as he placed her in the bed and tucked her in. He could wait to hold him daughter in his arms. He couldn't wait to teach her how to fly the TARDIS and show her all of his favorite nooks and crannies of the universe. He slipped under the covers next her her putting a warm hand around her. Though he could not feel the movements of their child, he knew that she was there. Peaceful and safe. River stirred as he lay down next to her, snuggling into his warmth. She sighed, her eyes still heavy with sleep. "Do you think we could use that room for the nursery?" She asked sleepily.

He held her close, shifting his head to speak into her ear. "I think that's a brilliant idea."

She smiled weakly, "Could we start working on it now?" Her eyes were already closed again, her head tucked into him.

"I'd rather you get a good night's sleep first. It's very late." He glanced at the clock sitting on the nightstand next to their bed. He was getting pretty tired himself.

"I'm not tired." She mumbled, shifting closer to him, half asleep.

"If you have the energy to get up and get paint, furniture, and plan where we're going to put everything, I'd say go for it." A yawn escaped his mouth.

"Maybe we should wait until tomorrow." She murmured. He smiled and kissed her on the side of the head.

"Agreed" He settled into the warmth of the bed and let sleep overtake him. She fell asleep, having a nightmare-free night for the first time in a very, _very _long time.


	6. Good Morning To My Midnight Blue Skies

**Ch 6**

The next day, the Doctor came into their room holding two cups of steaming tea. He bent over to kiss River. "Morning, love." She stirred, squinting up at him as her eyes adjusted to the light of the room.

"Good morning, sweetie." She smiled. He handed her the cup of tea before sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Slept well I take it."

She nodded, sitting up and taking a sip of her tea, "Very well thanks to you."

"I do what I can" He grinned. "When you're ready, I've already but the paint in the nursery so we can start painting." He was jubilant.

She beamed, "Let's start right now." She was excited to get started. He set his tea down, offering a hand to help her up. She took his hand, struggling to stand up. He held out a second hand, pulling her to a stand. "There we are" She sighed once she was finally on her feet, looking down at her belly, "This is certainly getting in the way of things."

" 'This' will be out of the way soon enough." He took her hand and they started walking to the yet-to-be nursery. She followed after him, stopping in the doorway of the room, looking around.

A few already opened midnight blue paint cans were in the middle of the room. There were long paint brushes so they could reach the ceiling. He scratched the back of his head. "I didn't know if you wanted a lighter shade or not.."

"Well, I think the room will be a bit dark, but as long as you like it, it's fine." She answered, not terribly displeased with the color. He smiled. "I love it" He briskly went to the center of the room and picked up one of the brushes and dipped it in the paint. She followed, beginning to paint one of the bare white walls.

After a while, the paint fumes began to give her a headache, but she didn't want to stop. He set his paint brush down when he finished one of the walls and up crept behind her, wrapping his arms just above her bump. "Finished one of the walls."

She jumped a bit, surprised by the feeling of his arms around her. "You're fast." She murmured, leaning back against him as she looked up at her wall which was barely half finished. "Or maybe I'm just slow."

He chuckled. "I think it was the first one. Do you want help?"

"I can do it on my own, thank you very much." She let her head fall back to rest against his shoulder, as she grinned up at him, "You can start on the next wall."

"I'd rather stay right here." He enjoyed having her lean on her while she painted. "And we can a break once you're done here. Finish our tea and get some of these fumes out of our systems." He scrunched his nose at the smell of the wet paint.

River smiled, "Mmm, I like your idea much more." She continued to paint until the whole wall was done. "Break now?" She asked, eager to get out of the smelly room, thinking it probably wasn't the best place for a pregnant woman to be.

"Yes, these fumes are getting to my head. There's not telling how you feel right now." He looked a bit concerned, wondering if she had a headache or something. He happily lead her away from the drying paint. She put a hand to her throbbing head, happy to be out of the room.

"I think I need some water." She murmured, "And perhaps a place to sit." She hadn't realized exactly how bad her headache was until now. He brought her back to the bedroom, handing her the now cold tea they left on the nightstand.

"Maybe I should finish the painting. I don't think It's such a good idea for you to be in there until the paint dries."

She nodded, not arguing with him for once, "I think that might be best."

"It won't take too long. I'll be done and then we can put the furniture in when the paint is dry. Feeling better?" He asked when she'd finished her tea"

She nodded, "A bit, thank you. Do we even have proper furniture that we can use?" She asked.

"We have my old cot and..." He thought. "Er.. that's it. I think we might need to go shopping"

"We can go after you finish painting, alright?" She smiled softly, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"Sounds like a plan." Is wasn't more than thirty minutes later that the Doctor returned to the room, paint splotches covering his clothing. She looked up from the books she had been reading, laughing when she saw the paint bits all over his clothes.

"I think you might need to change before we go out, my love."

He blushed and chuckled. "Yeah.." He stripped of his cloths, searching the dresser for some clean ones. She watched him as he stripped off his clothes, her eyes fixed on him intensely as she bit her lip. He turned as he buttoned his shirt. "What?"

She licked her lips as she watched the last bits of his bare chest disappear beneath the buttons of his shirt. "Nothing, just these pregnancy hormones have made me very..." She tried to find the proper word without sounding crude, "frustrated."

"Frustrated?" He raised an eye brow. "In what way?"

"In the arousal sense." She purred, standing up and moving towards him, "Let's just say, it doesn't take much to get my blood pumping thanks to these bloody hormones." His face turned scarlet as he was pushed against the dresser. She kissed him hungrily, her hands moving from his chest up to his hair.

"River...!" His words were lost as her lip press against his again. He couldn't help but kiss her back, moving his hands around her.  
"Hmm?" She hummed, sucking on his lower lip. She smiled in satisfaction as he felt his hands move around her.

"Oh, you make it so hard to resist you." He stepped forwards and pinned her down in the bed, not moving his mouth away from hers. She laughed against his lips, trying to push her body up to his, having a bit of difficulty with the added weight. He chuckled, moving down so his head was between her thighs. He pushed her dress up and her knickers down.

She whimpered, her chest heaving as she tried to look at him over her protruding stomach. One hand rubbed her leg while he began licking her swollen clit. She moaned, her back arching as she grabbed fistfuls of the bedding. He grinned seeing the effect he had on her.

He slipped his fingers into her, rubbing against her inner walls. She choked out a gasp, trying to rock her hips down into his fingers, her whole body flushed pink with arousal. He went deeper. Faster. He reached down with a spare hand to grip his length. She moaned and whimpered, clutching onto the sheets as she squeezed her eyes shut. He knew that they were both close. He withdrew his fingers and pushed his cock into her. He held himself on his hands above her, careful of her belly.

She nearly came undone when he pushed into her, extra sensitive now that she was pregnant. She kissed him needfully, clutching onto his biceps. He thrust into her, fast enough to please her, but slow enough to not be too rough. He let out a low groan as the peak drew nearer. She continued to whimper, struggling to hold herself together as he thrust into her. Hearing his low groan nearly sent her over the edge. He leaned down to kiss her, not faltering in his pace. He moaned into her mouth. She groaned, lightly nipping at his lower lip as her nails sunk into his arms.

He moved his head down, kiss a line down her neck before reaching her breast. He sucked at it, leaving a red mark where his mouth was. She groaned, pushing her upper body closer to him, eager for more. He obliged, tracing circles with his tongue around her nipple, lightly sucking every now and then.

"Oh, sweetie..." She breathed, her chest heaving as she tightened her grip on his arms.

"Are you really going to hold out so long?" He smirked knowing that it was taking her a lot of willpower not to come right then and there.

She smiled up at him, "Just because my body's more sensitive than usual, doesn't mean I can't hold out for as long as normal." She pushed her hips up towards his.

"Yes I don't doubt that" He grunted at her movements. "But as much as I'd love to spend the rest of the day here with you, I would like to get the shopping done before dark"

She stared up at him for a moment, "Fine, but promise me we'll do this again later."

"Promise" he said, kissing her just to prove his point. She kissed him back, her hips moving up to meet his again, unwilling to hold out any longer.

In a swift move, he pushed into her, deeper than before causing them both to go over the edge. Her body trembled as her walls tightened around his length, her body arching into his. She panted, trying to catch her breath. He grinned. He loved seeing her unravel like that beneath him. He pulled out gently, still trailing kisses on her warm skin. She sighed contently, smiling as he pressed kisses to her skin.

"I love you." She murmured.

"I love you more." He teased, pulling her so she was sitting up.

"But I love you the most." She teased right back, fixing her dress so she was all covered up again. He zipped he trousers into place, still grinning.

"So where to next?" He clapped his hands together. "Out of all the baby stores in all of the universe, which one should we go to?"

She thought about it for a moment, "I don't know, which one is best?" Her beaming expression, was quickly overcome with surprise as she moved a hand to her belly.

"River?" He really hated when she did this without telling him what was going on. He sat next to her. "What is it?"

She held her breath, not speaking for a moment, "I could have sworn I felt her kick just now." She finally said, letting out a disappointed sigh, "Just wishful thinking I suppose."

He looked confused. If River felt something, it would be highly unlikely to be a figure of her imagination. He put a hand where hers was and waited a few moments.

She looked over at him, "What are you doing?" She asked, a bit confused as to why he was doing this.

"You said you felt her kick. I just want to see if you were right" He waited a few moment more, nothing happened. The glimmer of hopefulness that had been in her eyes vanished when nothing happened after a few more moments.

"I thought it was her." She whispered. She felt another kick-like flutter a mere moment after she spoke and she looked over at him. "Maybe I'm just going crazy..."

His eyes were wide. "No, your not crazy" He looked up at her, a smile creeping on to his face. "I felt that one! But, that's impossible! Unless there another one, or-or some medicine or..." He was at a loss for words. It was impossible, yet there it was. The small kick of a child from inside River.

Her face paled and her eyes grew wide, "What do you mean another one?"

"I'm not saying there is... it's a possibility..." He trailed off, entertaining the thought, the possibility of there being a second child. She stared at him, her hearts pounding, just the thought of there being two babies terrified her.

"But...wouldn't we have know before now? Would we have seen another baby on the ultrasounds we've done?"

"There are time when the second twin is hidden behind a placenta." He head was pounding. Could it really be that they were having twins? The thought seemed unreal and yet the possibility was right there before them.

River continued to stare at him, still looking rather pale. She had been having enough worries thinking about having one baby, but two? That was too much for her, she didn't think she was ready for that. "Doctor..."

"W-we can't be sure, can we? I mean, there are other explanations for this, right?" His breathing was a bit more heavy and her was pacing in front of her.

"I-I don't know...Do you think maybe what we just did could have done something?" She asked, her mind still flooded with the idea of twins.

"I don't know, maybe?" He was pretty much in a full panic. Not knowing what else to do, he took her hand and swiftly went to the medbay. River's heart was pounding, she had promised the Doctor she wouldn't get stressed, but that promise was going out the window at the moment. Her breathing was slightly labored as they went to the medbay, the stress and panic of the situation catching up to her. The machines were already set up for them when they entered the room.

"Don't lie down this time" If it were twins, the likelihood would be that they'd have to be at a different angle to be able to see them. He frantically put the gel on her stomach and searched with the probe.

Every time he said the word "twins" she felt like she was going to pass out, and she probably would if that ended up being the case. A part of her prayed that it was just Freya, completely terrified of being a mother of two babies at the same time.

He stared at the image on the screen. He starred for the longest time. He could speak. He couldn't even stand and he sat silently next to her before his knees had the chance to buckle. He felt like he was going to pass out, but didn't. Every time he tried to for words, they were lost.

She stared at him, "Doctor..." She whispered frantically, "Doctor, what is it?" Her head was spinning.

"T..." The words still wouldn't come. He tried again. "T..."He cursed himself for not being able to so much as make a syllable. He pointed squeezed her hand and pointed a quaking finger to the screen.

There was Freya, peacefully resting, undisturbed by the outside world. And there was her placenta, just above her. Behind that was the upper body of another child. River wasn't sure if she was going to vomit, cry, pass out or simply all three. She stared at the screen for another moment before darting for the bathroom, definitely vomit.

Her whole body shook as she heaved into the toilet, her face turning a frightening shade of white. The Doctor immediately was shook out of his daze at the sight of his sick wife. He dashed after her and pulled her hair out of the way just in time. Managing to find his voice, he was able to say her name.

"River.." It was full of worry and concern at the sight of her pale face. She couldn't speak as she felt another wave of sick pass over her, vomiting again. She trembled on the floor, her forehead and neck clammy. She tried to push herself up, only to have her legs give out from beneath her. He was instantly by her side supporting her weight. "It's okay, I've got you River." He bent down and sat on his knees, eye level to her. He didn't know what to do. The last time she was sick like this was at the beginning of her pregnancy. He doubted that water and saltines would help much now.

She struggled to catch her breath, her stress levels definitely higher than they should be, "Are...are you sure that we're having t...t?" She couldn't get the word out either, nearly vomiting for a third time. He was afraid that saying the word would cause her to pass out.

"Twins. There's no question." He own heart was racing, but all of his attention was on her. He new that this would be stressful, but he never imagined this much. "Breathe"

She did her best to continue breathing somewhat normally. She shook her head, so many different thoughts running through her head all at once. It made her head hurt and her heart hammer harder in her chest. Like her husband, she couldn't manage to find her voice. She could only look up at him in distress. Not knowing what else to do, he put his arms her and pulled her into his chest, he could feel her heart pounding.

"It's going to be okay, River. We can handle this. It's going to be fine." He was starting to feel a bit better, himself. Another baby. Knew that he wanted more kids. A little brother or sister for Freya. He didn't expect it to happen like this, but he knew it'd be okay. River on the other hand was feeling the exact opposite.

She hadn't told him about her worries of being a mother. Twins meant two little lives she was responsible for. Two children she would completely screw up if she was a bad mother. Two little people that were depending on her to keep them safe from the people like the Silence out there that would do anything to harm them. She had had her doubts about have one baby, two was too much. She could handle a lot of things, but this wasn't one of those things.

"River..." He broke the silence after minute, or maybe hours, he didn't know. "Do you want to talk?" He knew they'd have to discuss this sooner or later.

She swallowed, her gaze fixed on her fidgeting hands. "What's there to talk about?"

"That was a pretty extreme reaction. There's clearly something on your mind." He pointed out.

"It doesn't matter what's on my mind. There's nothing we can do about any of this, so it doesn't matter." She didn't want to make him upset by saying she didn't want another baby, and she didn't want him to think horribly of her if she did tell him.

"What do you mean? Of course it matters!" He stroked circles in her back. "Your thoughts on this matter to me. Everything you say matters to me because you're my wife and we're in thing for the long run." He paused. "I.. I know this isn't exactly what you wanted, but we can make it through."

"I don't want another baby." She whispered, her distress showing in her words. "Doctor, I wasn't even completely sure I wanted one baby. You think that we'll be able to handle this, but I don't agree. You're so much more...parental than I am. I don't think I can do it, but there's nothing we can do about it now."

He didn't know what to say. He was a little taken back and even a bit hurt, but he knew where she was coming from. She'd been raised to kill, not to care. But she was so much more than the psychopath she was raised to be. "River, you will make a great mum. I know because you already love our children so much. You've gone out of your way to care for them and make them happy" He thought of when she showed him her secret room. "We can do it. We already are doing it and you're right. There's nothing more we can do, but I can tell you that you are going to be amazing mother and love these children the moment they're placed in your arms." He mustered up a smile. He truly did believe that every thing would be just fine and he tried his best to make River believe that, too.

She swallowed, unable to look at him. She knew that she had disappointed him with her words. She thought that he didn't understand where she was coming from, he hadn't been through what she had been through. She truly didn't want twins, but that choice wasn't up to her anymore. She would make another sacrifice to make him happy. She had grown accustom to putting his happiness before hers, and rarely ever complained. So she nodded slowly, seemingly agreeing with him on the exterior.

He kept his arms around her wanting to believe her. "Are you still feeling sick?" He tried to keep his voice soft.

She shook her head slowly, remaining silent. She wanted to lock herself away for hours so she could do all the things she felt she couldn't in front of him: cry, scream, throw things across the room. She wanted to have that little room all to herself again, where it was just her and Freya, or at least so she thought.

"Do you want me to stay?" He could sense that she might need some time alone to process this.

"I don't care." She whispered, breaking her silence. She didn't want to deny him of staying with her, believing it would hurt him if she said no.

He looked at the floor, "I'll... go. Make some food or fiddle with wires." He carefully released her from his embrace and got up.

She didn't move to stop him, turning and vomiting again just as he was leaving. He glanced back at her, not exactly wanting to leave her, but knowing they both needed some thinking room.


	7. And baby makes four

**Ch 7**

River leaned against the toilet, her breathing heavy as she tried not to look as miserable as she felt. Bits of sick had gotten into her curls and she closed her eyes, fighting back her emotions. The telepathic hum of the TARDIS flooded the room in attempt to make her feel at least a little bit better. She did feel a bit comforted by the TARDIS, her trembling body finally relaxing. The hum stayed in the room, low and comforting, but there was a new and familiar feeling that touched her mind. A warm spot, barely noticeable at first. As the warm spot became more noticeable, she tried to ignore it. She felt like she didn't deserve the special connection after all the horrible things she had thought and said. After a while, her curiosity began to get the better of her.

_Mum? Mum, I heard you talking to Freya and I was wonder when it would be my turn. Sorry for being impatient, but I couldn't wait. _

She bit back tears, her heart melting as she heard her baby_. Of course you can have your turn now, my love. I'm sorry you had to wait so long. _

_It's okay. I know how to be patient. _The voice sounded happy and even excited to be talking to her. _Why did Freya stop talking to me? I said sorry when I accidentally kicked her. Freya's...she's sleeping. _River didn't know how else to explain it, the happy and excited tone pulling at her heart. _She won't wake up until after you two are born. _

_Oh. I didn't know that she could sleep for that long. She always likes to play a lot. How long will that be? _

_I don't know for sure, but won't be for another few weeks. I know you may feel a little lonely now, but you can talk to me and Daddy now. You're Daddy's very eager to meet you. _

_I can't wait to meet him too! I like when he rubs your belly and then I can feel his hand. Sometimes me and Freya would talk about what you guys would look like. _

She smiled weakly, smoothing the material of her dress down against her belly. _You'll find out soon enough, sweetheart. Would you like to talk to your Dad now? _

_ two seemed a little upset earlier. I couldn't really hear you though 'cus' I was half asleep. Are you okay? _

She breathed a sigh of relief, thankful that the baby hadn't heard all the horrible things she had said earlier. _Everything's fine now. I'm alright, but I think we should find your Dad and make sure he's alright too. _She finally gathered the strength to push herself up off the floor.

_I heard you being sick into the toilet but maybe that was just something you ate. I'm glad you're okay. Why would dad be upset. Did he eat the nasty food too? _

_Well...something like that. _She walked down the hallway, looking around for her husband. "Doctor?" She called softly.

There was a distant _zap_ from the electrical current of a wire and than an "Ow!" from the Doctor. "Doctor?" She called a bit louder this time, hurrying to the source of the noise, finally finding him. "Are you alright?" She asked, a bit of worry etched across her face.

He was under the console. He was cradling his chard finger in his hand and cursing under his breath. "Yes I'm fine." He examined the burn. "I just burned myself"

"Here, let me see." She stepped forward, taking his hand to examine his finger, being very gentle with him. He winced, but didn't argue, letting her see his hand. "I was trying to reprogram the rooms so the nursery would always be next to our room."

She smiled softly, "That's a very good idea, but I think the TARDIS can take care of that for us on her own." She examined his finger, "We should probably get you some ice, but you should be fine in a bit."

"I know" He looked up at her. "Feeling better?" He asked, noting that she wasn't as pale as she was when he left.

She nodded, "I had a little talk with...someone." She placed a hand on her belly, smiling as she felt eager little kicks.

His face lit up. "Really? I... They didn't hear us, did they?"

"No, they didn't hear." Her smile grew as she watched his face light up, "But we did talk about you."

"Er.. what did you say?" He was well aware that sooner or later that she and the kids would be teaming up against him.

"I told them that you're a nasty, mean old man who hates children." She teased.

"Am not!" He protested, playing right along.

She laughed, "Well don't tell me, tell them!" She moved closer to him, taking his hands and bringing them to rest on either side of her stomach.

He smiled, leaning his head in close. "Whatever your mother told you, I am _not _a mean old man who hates children. Well, I am old, but I love children. I love you" He placed a kiss on her belly.

River smiled, watching him. "You know, they love it when you do that." She murmured as he kissed her belly. "They can feel you then."

"Hmm." He rubbed small circles on the spot he kissed, feeling the small kick of the baby. He giggled at the sensation.

She laughed again before leaning down to kiss him. "They love you, and they're very excited to meet you."

"I'm excited too!" He said to her stomach. He smiled up at her. She looked much happier than before.

She felt much happier now, the happy glow about her returning. "I'd really like to find out if this other baby is a boy or a girl. Then we could come up with another name."

"I'd like that too." He agreed. "But I don't know if we'd be able to see. They're pretty hidden behind Freya but we could give it a shot."

She nodded eagerly, "I'd really like to try."

"Alright then. Let's try." He took her hand, mindful of his finger and began back up the stairs. She walked up ahead of him, tugging him along, very eager to see their other baby. He followed behind her. The med bay was just how they left it, so the ultrasound was already there. He reached for the gel and lifted River's shirt. She bit her lip, watching him carefully as he prepped the ultrasound. He moved the probe around her belly. "I can't get a good angle" He grumbled.

She frowned, a bit of her happiness fading, "Are you sure?" She asked softly.

"No. Wait. Hang on..." His eyebrows furrowed in concentration. "Can you ask them to turn around?" She nodded, quickly concentrating on asking the baby to turn. He smiled. "There we go! It's another girl!" He told her.

Her eyes lit up, beaming down at him, "Oh, another girl! We have to think of a name for her!"

"What do you think? I chose Freya's name so it's only fair you get to chose hers'."

She thought about it for a moment, "What if we named her after my mother?" She asked. She and Amy had promised each other to name their children after each other and Amy had already held up her side of the deal.

He thought a moment, "That's a wonderful idea. Amelia Song."

"Amelia Song and Freya Song." She beamed looking down at her belly, "Hello girls..."

"I can't believe we have to wait a whole other month for these two."

She nodded, "I know, but hopefully that month will go by quickly. Now we really need to go shopping since we need twice the amount of things."

He slapped his forehead. "I almost completely forgot!" He stood up rather quickly and then sat again. "Um... River. I am sorry, but you _do _need the filter to go out..." He felt bad bringing the topic back up.

She huffed, "Really? _I_ have to wear a filter, but it won't look suspicious if we're in a baby store?"

"Well.. I.. Um..." He didn't really know what to say. She was absolutely right. If either of them were seen in a baby store, anyone would know that they were get supplies for themselves, filter or not. She raised an eyebrow, her arms folded across her chest as she waited for his response. "We can't go into the store looking like ourselves. We could... get someone to do it for us?" Now he was just thinking out loud.

She frowned, "I don't want to have someone go for us. I wanted to go because I thought it would be nice for us to pick everything out ourselves. If we sent someone to do that for us then what's the point?" She was a bit frustrated that everything had to be so secretive, but she knew that it was for their children's safety.

He tried his best to think of a solution, "I think we could risk it if you brought your gun." He said after a minute. "... and it would lower suspicions if you wore the filter."

"But I don't want to wear the filter." She pouted, "I don't believe the filter would do much good at all. Please, let me go out just this once."

"Make that two guns." He kissed her forehead and nodded. "High alert this time." Excitement leaked through his reprimanding tone.

"Oh, thank you!" She smiled, throwing her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly. "I'll go get my things." She was excited that he was finally allowing her out of the TARDIS without the filter that she had grown to hate. He grinned to himself and walked to the control room. He flipped levers and switched then waited for River. River came in a few minutes later, both guns concealed. "Ready?" She asked excitedly.

He held an arm out for her to take, "Right this way. " She took his arm, letting him lead her towards the doors.


	8. Where do we start?

**Ch 8**

They stepped out onto a street. The warm air tickled their cheeks and the sun shone in a clear sky. There were many houses along the sidewalk the TARDIS had parked on and across were a bunch of stores, including one called 'Norman's Baby Shop'

"Come on!" River smiled, spotting the shop and hurrying over to Doctor followed, well, stumbled along behind her due her her pulling his arm. But he was just as thrilled for this as she was. They entered the store practically jumping. She stared in awe at all the things in the shop, the tiny clothes and shoes, the stuffed animals and other toys, the soft blankets and all the furniture. "Oh Doctor...look at these!" She gasped, walking over to a rack of tiny little dresses.

He chuckled, "Look at that! It's a miniature dress, how cool is that!"

"It's hard to believe they're going to be this little." She murmured, examining the tiny shoes that were on display beside the dresses.

"Well, they might be just a little bit bigger. Infant Time Lords tend to be a bit bigger than infant humans" He pointed out.

"Really?" She looked up at him, her eyes wide. "Delivering the two of them is certainly going to be _fun_ now, isn't it..."

"Yes." He winced at the image in his mind.

She frowned, "I can't say I'm really looking forward to that."

He kissed her forehead. "I wish I could do something about that. But River, you are one of the strongest people I know. I sure you'll be fine"

She smiled weakly, "And it'll all be worth it in the end."

"Of course it will." He glanced over at a near by stand. "Oh look!" He ran over and picked up the item, spinning to show River. It was a onesie with a little bow tie printed near the collar. "Can we get it? Pleeease?"

She rolled her eyes, but couldn't bring herself to say no to his hopeful face, "Fine, but only if I get to pick out the rest of the clothes."

"Deal." He'd never argue with River's fashion sense. She smiled, pressing a kiss to his cheek before beginning to pull clothes off the racks and handing them to him. He took them, putting them in a basket.

It was about thirty minutes before they moved on to other section of the store, arms full of the tiny cloths. She looked around at the furniture around them, a bit puzzled as to where to start. The Doctor peered at the choices. "You know, we might only need one crib. We could reuse my old one."

She nodded slowly, "Yes, we could." She felt a bit overwhelmed surrounded by all the furniture. Picking out the clothes had been fun, but now she didn't know what half the things she was seeing were supposed to be used for. It just reminded her that she had no idea what she was doing. He could hear the hesitance in her voice and looked over to her. She seemed seemed lost looking at the items.

"River, are you okay?"

"I...I'm fine." She murmured, although her voice didn't match her words. "Maybe I should leave this to you..."

"Sure." His smile was warm and inviting. He turned to look back at what there was to get. They already had a rocking chair and one of the cots. The Doctor was faster than River at picking things out and in ten minutes, they had a lovely wooden crib, a bookshelf, and a rug featuring Earth's solar system. She bit her lip, standing off to the side as she watched him pick things out. She had her arms wrapped around herself, still feeling rather out of place and surprisingly insecure among all the things she knew so little about. He was talking to one of the store workers about transporting all of these items that were too large to carry. He kept glancing over to her before thanking the person and strolling back to her. "All set." She nodded slowly, staring at the floor.

"Do we need anything else?" She asked quietly, wanting to get as much as possible so they wouldn't have to make another trip back, "Blankets or toys or anything?"

"Nope. I've got plenty of toys made in the TARDIS and some nice quilts, too. Now all we have to do is fit everything through the door." He chuckles happily. She nodded, not laughing along with him as she usually would have.

"Let's go then." She was eager to get out of the store which was beginning to feel a bit cramped. He noticed but didn't say anything about her anxiousness. The work clerk followed behind them with the heavy items in a roller. She set them next to the blue box, deciding not to question why they wanted their stuff put here and went back to the store. The Doctor made sure the clerk was gone before attempting to push the things throught the small door. She moved to help him, momentarily forgetting that she wasn't supposed to lift heavy things, especially this late in her pregnancy.

"No, River. I can do it." He put a hand to her shoulder gently pushing her away. "Plus I'm not letting you lift these."

"But I want to help." She frowned, stepping towards him again.

"I know, but your pregnant. _Very _pregnant and that means no lifting heavy things."

She huffed, crossing her arms, "Well isn't there something light I can lift?" She asked, looking around at the things they had bought.

"Well, there's the clothes.." He eyed the large bag of dresses, trousers, skirts, and other things River had picked. She nodded, picking up the slightly heavy bag, moving into the TARDIS. He came into the TARDIS a few moment after her, a bit red faced from getting the things through the door.

"Are you alright?" She asked, walking over to him and cupping his face in her hands. "Shall I get you some water?"

"I'm fine" He huffed catching his breath. "Absolutely fine." She pressed a soft kiss to his lips smiling weakly. Her mood had gotten much better after leaving the shop, feeling much more comfortable now. He grinned, glad to see she was feeling better. "What do you say we go and make a nursery?"

She nodded excitedly, pulling on his arm, 'Let's go!"

He pushed the roller along behind her. It was much easier to push when not trying to get it through the small doorway. She hurried down the hall to the nursery, a large smile on her face as she set the bag of clothes down on the floor. He pulled the things after her, a bit out of breath. "You know, I'd never expect you to be that fast while being that pregnant"

She laughed, spinning around to face him, "Well, I don't let much slow me down." However her fast pace had taken up a rather large chunk of her energy and she collapsed into the rocking chair.

He chuckled. "Not much huh?"

She rolled her eyes, pouting "Well I got here faster than you didn't I?"

"Yes you did." He hopped over to her, giving her a kiss and looking back at the pile of things. "Where should we start?"

She smiled as he kissed her, looking over at the pile, "I suppose we should start with the crib, yeah?"

He clapped his hands together. "Right then!" He went back to the pile of things and tugged out the crib. Freeing it from the tangle of other things, it was much lighter on its own. "Where should be put it?"

"Hmm," She looked around the room, trying to decide on a good spot. "What about right there?" She asked, pointing to the left corner of the room opposite from the door. He nodded, bringing the crib over to the spot.

"Here?" She nodded, still sitting in the rocking chair, too tired to move.

"That's perfect, sweetie."

He grinned, feeling accomplished. "I'll go get the other crib" She smiled, closing her eyes, not bothering to respond. He stepped out of the room, returning not to many minutes later with the old cot. River still sat in the rocking chair, her eyes still closed, seemingly asleep. He took in the picture of his wife. She was so beautiful and he loved everything about her, from her golden curls to her swollen ankles. "River?" He whispered, checking if she was fully asleep.

"Hmm?" She murmured sleepily, barely awake. She kept her eyes closed, sunken back in her chair.

"I've got the cot" His voice was still lowered. "But if you want to sleep, I can finish here."

She opened her eyes slowly, "But you've already done so much of this on your own. I feel bad that I haven't been able to help you."

"No, it's perfectly fine. I'm more than capable of doing this. You on the other hand, you need your rest."

"But I want to help." She protested, trying to seem more awake than she really felt.

"Okay.." He said, uneasy.

She forced herself out of the chair, walking over to him, "Where would you like to put the other cot?" She asked.

"Are you sure you want to lift that?" Though he knew it wasn't that heavy, it was large and clumsy.

"Just tell me where you want to put it." She said, disregarding his comment as she moved to lift the cot. He wanted to stop her, but that would probably get his arm broken.

"The corner across from the other one so they're next to each other" She struggled to move the cot to where he instructed, only halfway to the spot when she set it down, one hand rubbing her strained back. He moved to her, placing her hands on her aching back and massaging. "Told you"

She began to relax again as he massaged her back, "Oh, shut up." She grumbled, hating that she could barely do this simple task without getting strained and tired.

"Not a chance" He rubbed for a few minutes before finishing moving the cot for her. "The shelf needs some assembly. You could help with that" He offered.

She nodded, sitting back down in the rocking chair, "In a minute." She murmured, "My ankles feel like they're going to explode." He went over to her and kneeled in front of her. He took one of her ankles and softly kneaded it. She hummed appreciatively, "You know, you don't have to do that." She murmured.

"It's my job. And I don't mind at all." He enjoyed making her happy. She smiled down at him, an absolutely adoring look in her eyes.

"Well it's very sweet of you." He kissed the top of her foot before moving to the next one. She squirmed as his fingers brushed along the bottom of her foot, "That tickles." He raised his eyebrows.

"Really?" He tickled her again.

She shrieked, trying to pull her foot away, "Stop it!"

He was smiling ear to ear. "Now why would I want to do that?" He moved a bit higher, tickling up her leg and back down. River couldn't respond due to her laughed, now trying to kick her feet away from him.

"Please, stop." She finally managed to say.

"Fine" He said still giggling. He got off the floor and leaned over to give her a kiss. "I had no idea that you were the ticklish."

She giggled as she kissed him back, "I'm not _that_ ticklish." She protested.

"Than what did you call that?" He asked.

She pouted, "You're so mean. And besides, you're much more ticklish."

"Am I now?" He challenged.

"Yes you are, I know you are." She stood, her fingers flying to his sides.

He let out a high pitch squeal and jumped back from her. She laughed, practically pouncing on him, knocking them both to the floor. He squirmed and struggled beneath her, but she had him pinned. "Come on, River! Let me go!"

She grinned, "Never." She proceeded to tickle him, knowing exactly which spots to hit. He jerked sideways, trying and failing to escape her fingers. She giggled, planting her hands on either side of his head, her head hovering directly above him, "Do you believe that you're more ticklish than me now?"

"Yes! Yes! You win!" He admitted defeat, hoping it would earn him freedom from her grip. She smiled, bringing her head down to press a kiss to his lips, a bit surprised that he hadn't tried to retaliate.

"That's what I like to hear." He couldn't help but reach his hands up and let them explore through her hair as they kissed. Her smile grew as she moved her head to place light kisses along his jawline. "The nursery can wait, my love." She murmured, her lips now trailing along his neck.

"But what if Amelia hears us?"

"Well, I guess you'll just have to be quiet." Her hands moved towards his bow-tie, quickly undoing it and tossing aside. He chucked, up for the challenge. He moved his hands up to begin unbuttoning his shirt.


	9. Hand me that screwdriver

**Ch 9**

She smiled, nuzzling her nose against his neck before moving back up to kiss his lips. She tugged at his shirt as he unbuttoned the buttons, eager to have it off him. He chuckled at her impatience, finding her absolutely adorable. He flung his shirt to the side and reached up to tug off hers. She practically ripped off her own shirt, letting out a frustrated growl as her belly got in the way of her moving further against him. He smiled, loving the way she pouted. He reached an arm up to stroke along her curves, admiring the way she looked. She blushed as she noticed the way he was looking at her. He made her feel good about herself, made her feel beautiful. He took her wrist, placing kisses along it until he reached the crook of her arm. He sat himself up more so her could trace kisses along her collarbone. Her eyes fluttered shut, loving the affection of his kisses. He moved lower slipping his mouth over or breast. She moaned quietly, leaning more towards him, her fingers tangling into his hair. He brought a hand down to remove his trousers. He tried not to move to much as to not disturb her pleasure. Her chest was heaving, her fingers tightening in his hair. When she noticed him trying to remove his trousers, she moved her hands to them as well, eager to help. They got their trousers off in no time and then their pants. Then it was just two naked bodies in the half built nursery, hers kneeling on top of his. She stared at him for a moment, biting her lip a hungry look in her eyes. "Remember to keep quiet." She breathed in his ear, before lightly nipping at his earlobe.

He nodded, "You're the one who's going to have trouble not making noise." He teased before lifting her just enough to slip inside of her. She pressed her lips together, already struggling to keep quiet, though she tried not to let it show. A small moan managed to escape her lips as she lightly bit down on the base of his neck.

"Try me." She breathed. His back stiffened at the feeling of her teeth. Though it didn't hurt, he wanted badly to groan, but he was determined to win. He bucked his hips into her with force that under normal circumstances would make her cry out. She let out a small whimpering squeak as his hips bucked into hers. She knew she was going to lose, but that didn't mean she would just give up, especially since she knew he would fight to win. He continued the motion several times. He was a little upset that all he got out of her was a squeak.

"I underestimated you." He whispered.

She smiled, "I guess you'll just have to try harder." She ground her hips down into his. He suppressed a moan, trying to think of what he could do to win this. She gave him a bruising kiss, rolling her hips around on his. Every inch of her body was ten times more sensitive than normal and she knew it probably wouldn't take much more until she broke. He could see her face in concentration of trying not to make noise. His eyes brightened up as he thought of a new way to try and win. In a swift move, but not too roughly, he flipped the two of them over so River was on her back and her leg resting on his shoulders. She sucked in a sharp breath, biting her lip. She looked up at him, her eyes wide, knowing that anything more and she would lose their game, but she had to admit, it was _so _worth it. He grinned. At this angle he had much more leverage and could move much faster. He began to fly in and out of her the fastest he was allowed with hurting her. She finally let out a loud moan, trying to buck her hips towards his. "I hate you." She said in between gasps, letting out another loud groan as she arched her back up.

"You're just mad you lost" His voice was breathy and he didn't slow his pace.

"Oh shut up, you had an unfair advantage." Her nails clawed at the floor, relieved that she could finally make noise.

"Did I really? And what was that?" He teased.

She managed to glare at him for a moment, "It's that I'm pregnant and you know that everything's much more sensitive now."

"I call that an advantage for you, not me."

"I really do hate you sometimes." She breathed, rolling her hips into his.

"No you don't " He grunted. Her leg hooked around the back of his neck, trying to pull him closer to her as she drew nearer and nearer to her unraveling. She drew him close enough that he place could more kisses along her belly. Her skin tingled with every kiss and she could feel small movements beneath her skin, hoping Amelia didn't know what was going on. The Doctor seemed to have forgotten about the risk of being caught by their very own daughter. He let out loud groans as he too, came closer to the edge.

"Doctor..." She hissed, her hands moving to cover her belly, as if trying to shield the children from his loud groans, although they did wonders for her own arousal.

"Right, sorry" He blushed, shushing his noises.

"It's alright." She murmured, "It's quite sexy if you ask me." She smirked, wanting to make him blush even more. Her chest was glistening with sweat, her cheeks flushed.

"You know what I find sexy? You. Down to every curve, you are the sexiest thing I've ever seen."

"Really?" She asked, beaming up at him, "I'm the sexiest thing you've ever seen?"

"Really" He confirmed. "Nothing in the universe compares to you." His praise for her had made her cheeks a bit redder, which she hadn't been expecting.

"I love you _so_ much." She breathed, completely loving and adoring.

"I love you, too. More than you could ever imagine." He grunted as pleasure rose in him. She let out a rather high pitched cry, her head banging against the floor as her back arched up towards him. He grinned at his handy work. Her head hit against the floor again, deciding that she couldn't hold back her volume anymore as she moaned again.

She felt Amelia kick again, this time much stronger. "She's definitely awake..." She murmured, looking down at her belly.

He blushed, "Did she.. er.. hear us?"

"I don't know..." She murmured, her hand running along her belly, "But you'd better keep quiet so she doesn't." He grumbled a bit, not wanting to have to be quiet, but nodded, resuming his actions. She struggled to keep quiet again, finding it even harder than before as she was nearer to her release. He leaned down to press his lips to hers softly moaning into her mouth. She came as he moaned into her mouth, struggling and failing to suppress her moans as her body trembled beneath his. He followed right after her, doing an only slightly better job of staying quiet. He looked at her with a satisfied grin on his face. She smiled up at him, panting. She was exhausted how, having spent all her energy. He pulled out and crawled over to sit next to her and let her regain her energy.

"You know, Riv. I was thinking,.. maybe we should be planning more for when the babies come." She shivered slightly, resting her head against his knee.

"What sort of planning?" She asked quietly, looking up at him.

"Like for the birth. Is it going to happen in the TARDIS? Do you want to be in the bathtub? Am I going to deliver them? Those kinds of things." She made a face, hating to think about the details of the birth.

"Is there anyone else who can deliver them?" She asked softly, thinking that's she'd prefer to have her husband by her side rather than at her feet. He thought for a couple moments.

"I had a companion, Martha Jones. Did I ever mention her? She's been training to be a doctor. She won't recognize me though. And there's Jack and his team at Torchwood. They're all experienced in that kind of stuff. " He paused, thinking. "I think you should have a water birth."

"Why do you think that?" She raised an eyebrow, "And you have mentioned Martha. To be completely honest, I think I'd prefer her, especially with my...history with Jack, I wouldn't want him delivering our children." He nodded understanding. He didn't want Jack near that part of her either.

"Water births are a lot more comfortable" He explained. "It's more relaxing for you and the babies, it reduces tearing, and there's less clean up afterwards. Plus, it would allow me to be near your head and hold your hand and catch the babies at the same time."

She nodded slowly, "Well if that's our best option, then it's fine with me." She smiled up at him weakly, "I suppose we should talk to Martha about delivering the twins then."

"Still not going to let me do it then?"

"Do you really want to?" She frowned slightly, not really wanting him to do it. However, if it was what he _really _wanted, then she would have no choice but to agree.

"I mean, if you don't want me to... it should really be your choice."

"But I'm asking you, do you really want to do it?"

"Well... yes. Of course."

"Well then you can do it." She stood up, collecting her clothes and pulling them back on. He grinned, watching her bare skin disappear under the fabric.

"So how about that bookshelf. You still up for it?"

She glanced over at him, laughing a bit, "I'm exhausted, but I think we can manage to finish it together before I go take a nap." He hopped up, grabbing his trousers and redressing before pulling out the large box that contained all the wooden pieces of the shelf. She walked over to him, examining the box before opening it, "Now, I know how much you hate it, but we have to follow the instructions."

"Wha-? But, but... fine" He grumbled, reaching for the sheet of paper and unfolding it.

"I'm serious about this." She gave him a look, wanting to be sure he would listen to her, "We don't want the book case falling apart and crushing one of our daughters because you didn't read the instructions properly." He didn't like the thought of that.

"Right." He said and turned that paper right side up.

She nodded, "So what do we have to do first?"

"Connect the base to the... no wait. That's not right. First we but the back on... no, hang on." He turned that paper sideways then back up right. "Ah. Fit together pieces G to A. A to B, B to C, and so on."

She raised her eyebrows, "And what's that supposed to mean? Which piece is A..."

"Um.." He handed her the paper and went over to the box. He pulled out all of the many wooden bits and slayed them out on the floor. "They're lettered." He picked up one of them. "This is A"

"Alright then..." She looked around, finding G. "Here, you should do it."

"Right, okay" He held the pieces together and looked up at her. "Do we have drill or something?"

She rolled her eyes, "You're the one that lives here all the time, you should know. I'll go find one..."

"I think it's by the kitchen. Top shelf of the supply closet, second right then a left." He told her. She nodded, heading off to the supply closet. Several minutes went by and she still hadn't returned. He waited for foot steps, but heard none. "River?" He called. There was no response from her. "RIVER?" He called again, louder. He could hear his voice echoing through the halls, but still no response. He jumped up, hearts pounding. Armed with a sonic, he stepped out of the room, cautiously making his way to where he sent her, still calling her name. There was a loud shout from down the hall, much further from where he had sent her. "River!" He started sprinting at full speed to where to noise came from, scared of what he might find. Another cry of panic came from where River was, backed up against the wall, her eyes wide with what almost looked like fear. He ran over to her. "River? River! What happened? What's going on? Are you hurt?" His voice was full of panic.

She looked over at him, staring for a moment as her fearful look melted into confusion, "What are you talking about?"


	10. You Can Breathe Now

Ch 10

"Wha-? River you screamed! You didn't come back and I was calling your name and I heard you scream just a second ago!" He was babbling so fast he didn't even notice the tally marks on his arm.  
She narrowed her eyes slightly, "Doctor, what have I told you about teasing me? I didn't scream, I don't remember screaming."  
"I saw you, Riv! With my very own eyes! You were right here, backed against the wall looking over there..." He trailed off, realizing what he had just said. He didn't dare turn his head just yet, though.  
"Right wh..." She trailed off mid-word as she looked back over at the spot. She gripped onto his arm, the panicked look in her eyes returning.  
"River.." His voice was quiet now in best attempts to be calm. "Please tell me you have your gun on on you."  
She shook her head slowly, "I took them off when we came back into the TARDIS."  
"It's okay. We're going to be okay." He gripped his sonic tightly. "When I say so, run." He whipped around and pointed the sonic at the Silent, holding back the electricity coming from it's fingers. "RUN!" She didn't register right away that he had said it, frozen in place. He glanced back at her for half a second, expecting her to be half way across the TARDIs already. "River! RUN!" He yelled again. She finally registered what he was saying, running as fast as she could.  
She normally would have refused to leave without him, but she had the twins to think about and protect. There was electrical sound that could be heard from where the Doctor was and a yelp. Foot steps followed behind River as the Doctor soon caught up with her. He was holding his arm tightly to his side. She stopped for a moment, her eyes falling to his arm. "Are you alright?" She asked, her voice full of concern.  
"Yes. Fine, keep going!" He put his arm behind her, pushing her forwards. Though the TARDIS would make it harder for the Silence to find them, they still had to move forwards.  
She struggled to keep up with him, finding it rather difficult to run. Another few feet and she had to stop, gasping for breath. He stopped, too, looking back behind them to make sure the coast was clear. "I think we lost them. How did they even get in here?"  
"I thought..." Her breathing was heavy, "I thought they couldn't get in the TARDIS."  
"So did I..." He trailed off on his thought, turning his attention to her. He came over, gently placing a hand on her back. "You alright? Babies are okay?"  
She closed her eyes, trying to calm down, knowing she had to try not to get stressed. "I-I don't know." She whispered, covering her face with her hands. He looked at her sympathetically. He didn't know which one of them was more terrified at the moment.  
"Here, why don't you sit down."  
She shook her head, breathing deeply. "I'm alright." She lied, not wanting him to worry about her.  
"River, you're exhausted. It's okay, we're safe now. The TARDIS won't let them find us. Please. Sit."  
She shook her head, beginning to pace nervously, "I don't need to sit." She was tense, on guard.  
"Yes you do. Would it make you feel better it we went somewhere more sucure?" He asked. She nodded, still pacing. Her heart was pounding, her head spinning. He supported the small of her back and they continued down the hall, praying the Silence wouldn't be around the corner. She was trembling as he lead her down the hall, leaning towards his body for some form of comfort. "River... you're shaking." He couldn't help but point it out, concerned for her well being. They made a left into a room. Of course the TARDIS had decided to put the sickbay here.  
"I'm just cold." She whispered, wrapping her arms around herself in a feeble attempt to make her statement look true. He grabbed a near by blanket and wrapped it as well as his arm around her body.  
"Is that any better?" She nodded, though she was still shaking. She rest her head against him, closing her eyes for a moment. "We're safe now" he repeated. "The old girl knows what she's doing. Look." He pointed a finger to were the door used to be, but was now a wall. "They can't get in here. We're safe." She opened her eyes, looking at the wall. She relaxed a bit when she saw that they would not be able to get in. She pulled the blanket tighter around her, her legs growing weak.  
"Will you sit now?" He asked, seeing that she felt safer. She nodded, taking a few shaky steps to a cot before laying down. "How's your arm?" She asked softly, wanting something to distract her.  
"Nothing some antibiotics and burn cream can't fix." He smiled at her, hoping it would make her feel better. He sat down on the cot next her her and placed his hands on either side of her belly.  
She forced a weak smile, then looked down at her belly, "Do you think they heard any of that?"  
"Maybe. You'll have to ask." He poked back at Amelia when she kicked him. "Amelia is still active. They've shifted their positions, but they're fine."  
"At least she didn't shield herself off." She murmured, relieved when she felt Amelia kick. She looked at him for a moment before closing her eyes, Amelia? Are you alright, sweetie?  
I'm just fine, mum. Came a response. I was going to ask you that. You sounded scared. Are you okay?  
I'm fine. She responded, though she didn't exactly feel fine Get some rest, love.  
Mum. She insisted. I can't feel your hearts beating really fast.  
It's alright, I'm alright. I promise. She didn't want to scare the poor baby and risk losing contact with her just like she lost contact with Freya.  
If you say so. Amelia adjusted herself more comfortably, leaving the subject alone. River swallowed, looking up at the Doctor.  
"What are we going to do?" She asked quietly.  
"Well, we can't leave here. At least not for a while. Thought the TARDIS will lead them to the main accelerator -they'll be incinerated immediately- that could take a while, up to a full day." He explained. She nodded, reaching forward and hugging him tightly, trying not to make it too obvious that she was seeking his comfort in doing so.  
"But they know I'm pregnant..." She whispered, "What if this happens again." He held her tight, scared that if he let go she'd slip away.  
"I'm not going to let that happen. I swear on my life, I'll will keep you safe." He pulled back so he could stroke the side of her face. "As for you, I think I might need to get you a few more guns." He tried to lighten the mood. She leaned into his touch, trying to suppress the memories she had of their past encounters with the Silence. She opened her mouth to speak, but couldn't find the words, simply shifting her gaze to the floor.  
He wished he could be better at lifting her spirits. Why wasn't he allowed a life free of the fear that someone would take away River? Of course he blamed him self, people he loved always got hurt because of him. The only thing he could do at the moment was hold River and tell her everything would be okay, even if neither of them believed it.  
She moved over so he could lay down beside her, wanting nothing more than to cuddle into him. Her heart still pounded in her chest and her head still hurt, but she tried to push all those feelings aside. He lied down beside her, his chest pressed against her back and arm wrapped around her waist. He placed his head in the crook of her neck, loving how they fit together perfectly. She smiled weakly, her arm draping over his.  
"Do you want to tell Amelia a story?" She asked, secretly wanting to hear his soothing voice.  
"Sure" He thought a moment. "I know a funny one. Once upon a time" He began "Before people were even around, there were dogs. Big ones and small ones. Brown ones and black ones. Tall ones and short ones. And one day. they all gathered around in the big meeting place that dog gathered around in."  
"A big meeting place that dog's gathered around in?" She laughed, cozying into him a bit more.  
"Yes! It was their secret meeting place away from all the other animals! Anyway, so all the dogs from all over the world to meet there. They were all there and getting a little inpatient. Dogs left and right were asking each other" And in a very silly 'dog' voice he said "'Do you know why we're here?' 'No, do you?' 'I have no idea"'  
She couldn't help but giggle at the voice he was making. "Amelia, you're daddy's silly isn't he." She smiled, feeling a rather strong kick in response.  
He chuckled too. " Finally, a bulldog came up in front of everybody and announced: 'Some of you have wondered why we have gathered here. We are here to chose a dog president!' The dogs all looked at each other and all started talking at once. 'Chose the grey hound! He's fast!' 'He's fast alright, but he can't fight!' 'How about the bull dog! He can fight' 'He can fight but he's got stubby legs, he can't run!' And all the dogs began arguing about who should be their president."  
She closed her eyes, her heart beating a bit less rapidly by now, her headache slowly disappearing as well, "So who did they pick?" She asked.  
"I'm getting there" He grinned glad she was enjoying the story too. "So they were all squabbling and such when the smallest stinkiest dog in the way back of the crowd popped up. 'Why not the dog who smells best under their tail?' Everyone thought this was a good idea so that all started sniffing each others tails. 'Pew! Not you!' They sniffed and sniffed, but no one smelled nice under there tails. That is why, to this day, dog sniff beneath each others tail when they meet." He concluded.  
"That was absolutely ridiculous." She giggled, smiling up at him.  
"Hey! I thought it was quite brilliant!"  
"Well Amelia certainly seems to have enjoyed it." She noted, looking down at her belly.  
"I thought she might. I told you that story when you were a baby. You loved it."  
She raised an eyebrow, "Did I really? I don't remember it."  
"Well, you were only a child."  
Her smiled faltered, "Yes, you're right. I don't remember much of being a child anyway..."  
"That's good I suppose. I don't think you'd want to remember."  
She moved a bit away from him, not saying anything for a moment, "Yes...but I wish I could forget the parts I do remember."  
"River... " He didn't know what to say. He would've just blocked those off too, but memories are part of what makes a person themselves. The memories of Kovarian, no matter how horrifying, were part of River. Taking them away would change her. If he had asked if she wanted him to block the memories, she would have declined the offer anyway. She understood that she was the person who she was today because of all the things that had happened to her, and she wouldn't change that. However, at times like these, her past frustrated her, and she wished that she didn't live in constant, hidden fear that something would happen again.  
"What?" She asked.  
"Nothing..." He shook his head, not realizing that he had been staring. "You just look quite adorable when you're thinking."  
She closed her eyes, trying to rid her thoughts of the painful memories, "Thank you." She whispered, wrapping the blanket a bit tighter around herself. They curled into each other once again.  
"You should sleep. They'll be gone by the time you wake up"  
"I don't think I can." She murmured, too paranoid to let her guard down. Everything that had happened had made the wall he created around her nightmares come crumbling down.  
"I'll be right here. The whole time. You have nothing to be afraid of." He said, not quite understanding.  
She shook her head, "I don't want to go to sleep."  
"Why not?' He asked gently moving a curl away from her forehead.  
"I just...I'd rather be awake." She whispered, looking away from him. He knew that that was a lie. After all the things that happened today, the ... shenanigans... and the running and lifting things, he knew she'd probably want nothing more than to sleep. He thought a long moment before putting two and two together.  
"They're back, aren't they." She thought about answering truthfully, but decided against it.  
"No, they're fine. I just don't want to go to sleep right now."  
"River, don't lie to me."  
She moved so her back was to him, "I'm not lying."  
"You just ran half way across an infinite ship and you're a month away from your due date. I am fairly sure that you'd love a nap right now." He pause moving her put an arm around her. "So maybe it's not nightmares. But there's something you're not telling me."  
She tensed as he touched her, "I'm fine." She insisted, not wanting to worry him.  
He hugged her closer. "If you insist, but I wish you'd go to sleep."  
She flinched as he hugged her closer, "I really don't want to."  
"Okay" He sighed. "Be we still have to wait out here a few hours. What would you like to do?"  
She shrugged, "What do normal human couples do together?"  
"I've never been in a normal human relationship. You might have to refresh my memory."  
"I haven't been in a normal relationship in hundreds of years. All I can remember is watching movies, playing games, making food...I was much younger then..."  
"There was someone before me? Do tell." He said excitedly. River hardly ever talked about her time as Mels.  
She scoffed, "I'm not really in the mood to tell you about my ex-boyfriend. I don't really want to re-live that part of my life right now."  
"Some other day then." He got off the bed and went over to the back of the room. "I don't know what I can do about movies, but there is a very convenient mini-fringe. Probably the TARDIS's idea." He reached inside and pulled out some cold cuts, fish fingers, and custard. "Oh look! It's got fish fingers and custard!"  
She tried to hide her smile, "Really, sweetie?" She stood up and walked over to him, "Is there anything else in there?"  
He looked back in the fridge. "Um.. wow, she really packed a lot in here. Pickles, deviled eggs, mashed potatoes, milk..." He started listing.  
Her eyes grew wide, "Deviled eggs? Oh, I want those." She said eagerly. He pulled out a tupperware full of deviled eggs and handed it to her while taking the fish fingers and custard for himself. She hummed happily as she munched on the food, walking around the room trying to find something to do.  
"I doubt there's much to do." He said through a mouthful of food. "It's only a sickbay."  
She tried to hide her yawn, "Well it doesn't hurt to look." She made a face as he spoke with a mouthful of food.  
He set down his food coming up behind her. He rested his head head on her shoulder. "Find anything?"  
"No." She mumbled, leaning back against him. "Nothing really."  
He kissed the side of her head. "Then what are we to do then?"  
"We could talk..." She murmured, her body leaning heavily on him with exhaustion.  
"Sure. Why don't you sit down." He could feel her putting her wait on him more and more.  
She nodded, sitting down on the edge of a cot, looking up at him through eyes heavily lidded with sleep, "What do you want to talk about."  
"How beautiful our children are going to be." He smiled, sitting next to her. She laughed, resting her head against his shoulder.  
She winced, placing a hand on the top of her belly. "She's kicking me in the ribs."  
He leaned down to her belly. "Amelia, no kicking your mother. She's had a long day."  
She sucked in a sharp breath as Amelia kicked her again, "It's alright, she doesn't know any better. "  
He rubbed the spot he saw the small foot appear. "That's why we have to teach her. No kicking."  
She watched him rub the spot, "She'll shift positions in about an hour, that seems to be what she likes to do." Amelia kicked hard against his hand, making River wince.  
He bent his head down to kiss the spot. "You should really tell her to stop."  
She shook her head, "It's fine, really. She just gets excited when you're around."  
"It's no reason to hurt you." He insisted. "Amelia, I see you, you can stop kicking your mother now."  
There was nothing for a few moments, "I can feel her shifting now." River murmured.  
"That's good." He smiled kissing her cheek. "She'll stop kicking you now."  
She nodded, "Doctor, I know you said you wanted to deliver the babies, but do you even know how to do it?" She had been thinking about it since they had talked.  
"Yes... mostly. I, mean, I've never actually done it..." He scratched the back of his head. "But I've been doing a ton of reading in the last few months."  
She raised her eyebrows, "Are you sure you're going to be able to handle it?" She was a bit anxious about the whole process, and him not being sure of himself would only make it worse. "I don't want you reading a book while I'm pushing."  
"I won't!" He defended. "I was even going to take a class with the Sisters of the Infinite Schism."  
"And when exactly where you going to do that?" She asked, "I'm due in a month, that really isn't much time."  
He fiddled his hands together not really having an answer to that. "I should call Martha..."  
She took his hands in hers, "You don't have to do that if you don't want to, I just want to make sure you're going to know what you're doing. I'm...worried, I don't want anything to go wrong."  
"Nothing is going to go wrong, I promise." He looked up at her, still hopeful. "Tell you what. Once we get this at sorted out, there's this parenting class we could go to. It's in two weeks and actually right before the class I was going to take." He looked down at his hands. "I mean.. If you want to. You might not."  
She smiled weakly, "I'd love to go." She kissed him softly, "And I promise to wear the filter of you want me to."  
"Well, it is a class for expectant parents. You don't really have to..." He thought a moment. "Though you probably actually should, now that I think about it."  
She nodded, "It's better to be safe than sorry, especially after what happened today..." He nodded, agreeing with her.  
He looked over as the door reappeared. "I think they're gone now."  
She looked in the direction he was looking, seeing the door reappear, "Are you sure?" She asked, still a bit tense.  
"I doubt she'd put the door back unless they were gone." He looked back at her. "Positive."  
She pushed herself off the cot, moving towards the door. "Could we go back to the nursery?"  
"Sure." He smiled putting an arm around her waist. She was near exhaustion at this point, instantly melting against him. "You sure do don't want to go to bed?"  
"Actually, bed sounds very nice." She mumbled, her eyes fluttering shut. He guided her to their bedroom, happy that she was finally agreeing to sleep. She stumbled along beside him, forcing herself to stay awake for just a little while longer. He helped her get situated in the bed, with really didn't take much since she was hardly awake to begin with. She flopped down on the mattress and he just had to tuck her in. She snuggled into the blankets falling asleep almost instantly. He snuggled in to bed next to her, scooting so he was right up against her. He didn't actually realize how tired he was until now. She subconsciously curled into him, her whole body relaxed. Sleep came easily for both of them.


	11. Without you I can't survive

**CH 11 [A/n] School is starting up so updates will be less... sorry**

The next day they finished building the nursery, Silence free. Thought they were on edge, the days passed quickly enough, full of reading to the babies, finding new food combinations, and figuring how the Silence got in there in the first place which was a proving difficult to figure out. The Doctor tried to push that to the back of his mind as he waited in the console room for River so they could go to their class. A loud, frustrated cry could be heard from the wardrobe room. River's belly hadn't stopped growing and it was getting rather difficult for her to find something to wear the bigger she got. Today especially had had her on the edge. It was the first time she was going to leave the TARDIS since the Silence had invaded, her hormones were worse than they had been in a while and it was taking her forever to find something that fit properly.

"River? Everything alright in there?" He called down the hall, though he had already started walking towards the room.

"No! Everything's not alright!" She shouted, picking up on of her heels and throwing it at the door before going back to trying to yank up the zipper of the obviously too small dress she had on. He ducked at the flying shoe before entering the room.

"Let me help you with that." He goes over to her and attempts to zip the dress. As he tried to zip the dress, the zipper broke. River just stared at the reflection of the broken zipper in his hand for a moment before bursting into tears. She normally would have laughed at crying over such a frivolous thing, but with her hormones the way they were, she was reduced to tears. "Oh River. He put a hand on his shoulder. "Riv, don't cry. W-we can get a new dress..." He tried to pick words that wouldn't make her more upset.

"But I'm huge!" She sobbed, "Nothing fits anymore!" She looked over at the pile of dresses that had also proven to be too small earlier. It seemed like half the contents of the wardrobe was in that pile and seeing it only made her cry harder. He pulled her closer, letting his shirt get soaked with her tears.

"River... You're carrying twins, it's supposed to be like this." He stroked the sides of her belly. "Plus, I think you're the perfect size."

She sniffled as the stream of tears began to slow, "But I'm ginormous." She protested, glancing over at her offending reflection in the mirror.

"You're beautiful." He insists. He walks behind her so she can see the mirror in full, still keeping his arms around her. "You're pregnant, not fat. Look. You are still stunningly gorgeous. I think you are what they had in mind when they thought of the term 'glowing'" She stared at her reflection, biting her lip as she listened to his words.

A weak smile began to appear on her face as she did her best to pull herself together, "That's very sweet." She whispered.

"It's 100% true." He snaked his head around to place a kiss on her cheek.

Her smile grew as she let him press his lips to her cheek. "Thank you.." She murmured, "But that still doesn't help my problem of having nothing to wear."

"River, we live in an eleventh dimensional machine that exists through all of time and space. You really think she doesn't have a dress that fits?"

"Well I haven't had any luck finding one." She huffed, crossing her arms.

"Maybe she just doesn't want you to leave." He snickered, wondering why the TARDIS would ever dare to challenge his pregnant wife. He went back over to the closet and rummaged through it.

"She doesn't want me to leave so she'd rather make me miserable? Well isn't that sweet." She said sarcastically as she watched him rummage through the closet. He said something that was muffled from inside the closet. He soon emerged with a black dress. It was decorated with tiny blue beads near the bottom. They looked almost like stars.

"Try this." She took the dress from him, hesitating a bit before trying it on.

"Will you zip it up for me?" She asked, worried that it wouldn't fit like all the others.

"Of course." He moved, pulling up the zipper until it reached the top. She kept her eyes closed, refusing to look in the mirror.

"How does it look?" She asked.

"Absolutely amazing." He said to her ear.

She opened her eyes, smiling as her gaze fell upon her reflection, "It fits..." She beamed, turning to see the whole dress. He enjoyed seeing her happy. He had become a lot better at comforting her. "Thank you!" She hugged him tightly, kissing his cheek.

"We'll, I can't take all the credit." He smiled "And you're still missing something."

She frowned slightly, "What am I missing?" He reached into his pocket and pulled out the perception filter.

"This." She sighed, taking the filter from him. As much as she hated wearing it, she did promise him she would. He fastened in behind her neck. Though they could still see the large curve of River's belly, if any one else looked, all they'd see was her flat stomach. She smiled weakly, running her hands along her full stomach. "Ready to go?" He asked, placing his hands on hers.

She took a deep breath, nodded, "I'm ready if you are."

He smiled. "Well then, come along Song." He took her by the hand leading her out. She hesitated a bit as she stepped out, a bit worried that there would be some type of threat outside the doors. A breeze was blowing. It wasn't strong, but enough to make the grass sway. The class was at a hospital of course. The tall building could be seen at the bottom of the hill they were on. A green moon, the universal sign for hospital, was painted on the side of it.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" She asked, staring at the hospital, trying to convince herself that it was one of the safest places she could be.

"You could stay in the TARDIS if you don't want to come." He said. "But if I'm delivering our children, I want to know what I'm doing. So yes. I'm sure I want to do this."

She closed her eyes, "Alright then, let's go."

They walked in to the hospital, him keeping a protective arm around her waist. They went up to the desk clerk. "Hi, we're here for the 10:00 class." River was on guard for an signs of danger and barely heard him talking to the clerk. She felt like everyone was staring at her and she wrapped her arms protectively around her belly.

"River? Are you listening?" The Doctor was trying to get her attention.

"Sorry what did you say?" She asked, his question bring her attention back to him, "Were you talking to me?"

"I said it's on the eighth floor. Elevators are this way." He looked at her a bit confused.

"Alright..." She noticed the look he was giving her, "What?" She asked.

"Nothing. You just seem... distracted." She waved him off, "I'm fine." She murmured, heaving towards the elevators.

"Right." He decided to leave it, following after her. She was still rather anxious as they walked up to the class and she fidgeted a bit the the perception filter around her neck as they approached the door. "You ready?" He asked, noticing her anxiety. "The parenting class is only fifty minutes and then it goes straight into the other bit."

She nodded quickly, "Yes, of course I'm ready." There were already a few other couples in the room. All of them having an obvious baby bump. River probably would win the 'who has the biggest belly' if any could actually see hers. The instructor helped them get situated at one of the tables. She noticed that all the other women in the room seemed to have much smaller stomachs than she did, which only soured her mood even more as she sat down at their table.

The class went by quickly. Or at least for the Doctor it did. He kept glancing over at her and she looked like she wanted to leave. The part about parenting was a basic 'how to' sort of thing. The second part covered a variety of topics starting with the basics of delivering a baby, then moving on to how to deal with things like a breach or if the cord was around it's neck. He he winced a little, hoping that wouldn't actually happen. River's face grew progressively paler as the instructor went on about all the complications, especially in twin pregnancies. She wasn't worried about her own safety as much as she was about the two children.

When the class ended, they didn't get up immediately. He took her hand in hopes of offering a little comfort. "None of that's going to happen, Riv."

She squeezed his hand tightly, "But you can't be sure of that..." She whispered, "I...I want them to be safe."

"They are safe, I'm sure of it. They're in good position and they are Time Lords after all." He rubbed the back of her hand with his thumb. "It'll be alright."

She let out a shaky sigh, leaning forward and hugging him tightly, "I hope you're right."

"Me too." He said under his breath. "How about I make you a nice cup of tea when we get back?"

"I'd like that a lot." She smiled softly, pressing a kiss to his cheek. As she looked up at the doorway, her smile faltered for a moment.

"River?" His eyebrows furrowed.

Her grip on his hands tightened considerably, then released, her eyes moving back to meet his, "Sorry...I just thought...I thought I saw something." He looked behind him to see an empty doorway. "I don't see anything..." He looked back at her. "But best to have your guns at the ready. Just in case."

She went to retrieve one of her guns, only to find the spot where she had placed it empty. She swallowed, "I want to go back to the TARDIS right now."

"Come on." He stood up. "Where's your gun?"

"I-I don't know it's not here." She took his hand, pulling him towards the door. They moved quickly to the elevator.

"Do you have a second one?" She checked for the second, only to find it gone too. "I know I had them..." She murmured. They stepped into the elevator.

He pressed the closed button repeatedly. "We need to get out of here." Her heart began to pound as the elevator lights dickered above them. She clutched onto his hand. He instinctively wrapped his arm around her. He scanned the elevator with his sonic. The lights flickered again and her heart skipped a beat.

He looked at the readings. "The Silence. We are too vulnerable in here. We have to get out." He soniced the button panel to make the elevator stop. Her heart began to pound as the elevator lights flickered above them. She clutched onto his hand. He managed to pull the doors open and wedge himself between them so they wouldn't close. "Go!"

She looked at the rather small opening, the flickering of the lights becoming more frequent, "I don't think I can fit."

"We don't have much of a choice." He pushed the doors open as much as he could. "Just try."

She tried to force her way through the doors, but could barely manage to get halfway through, "I can't...I'm sorry I can't."

He released the doors, running a hand through his hair. "Okay... not good..." He wreaked his brain for an escape when the light's went out, staying that way a few second before coming back on again. He reached out for River, securing her in his arms. "Stay close to me."

He could probably feel her heart pounding as she clutched onto him. "What are we going to do?" She asked, her whole body trembling.

The lights went out again.

"I don't know" He said, still looking around. "There's always the escape hatch..." He pointed up. "But I don't think..."

"What? What is it?" She asked, glancing up.

"Elevators have door on the ceiling." He gestured to the top of the elevator which had its escape door already open. He looked back down at her. "I think somethings gotten in."

She froze, her eyes growing wide, "Doctor..." She whispered, looking to the corner of the elevator.

"No..." He followed her line of sight to the creature in the corner. His grip around River tightened. He had no weapons, no way of protecting his family, but he'd be dead before he let them touch her. Electric sparks shot out of the creature's fingertips and River shrieked, not wanting her husband to get hurt. The Doctor pulled out his sonic, keeping the electricity at bay momentarily. "River, get out of here!"

"How?" She cried, looking for some way out of the elevator. "There's no way to get out."

"I-I don't know, can you get the door open again?" She moved away from him slightly to try and open the door. As she was struggling to force the doors apart, another wave of electricity was shot in her direction.

The Doctor jumped to block her from the electricity. Some of it was redirected from the screwdriver, some of it hit him, but despite his attempts, the Doctor could not block all of it. She let out a pained cry as she was hit, her whole body trembling with the shock. "River!" He instinctively turned around to make sure she was okay. Seeing her shaking sent fear and panic through his veins. He knew they had to get out of there. Now.

With strength half powered by adrenalin and half by terror, he pried the doors open far enough for both of them to fall through.

She dragged her body out of the elevator, gasping for breath as her body crumpled to the floor. The door closed, keeping the Silent in side the elevator.

The Doctor ran to her side "River!" She was shaking like a leaf, gasping for breath. "R-River..." Hot tears streamed down his face as he looked over her burn wounds that covered most of her body. "Th-This is my fault. This always happens, I shouldn't have brought you here..."

She couldn't hold back the tears that threatened to spill over, "It's not your fault..." She whispered, trying to push herself up, only to collapse again, "I just want to go home..."

"I'll get you there. I swear." Tears blurred his vision, but he looked around. There weren't any people around, just a dead nurse. They still had a floor to go before they could get out. Not knowing what to do, he lifted her up and moved as fast as he could out of there.

Her breathing as still frighteningly unsteady, and she was still shaking like crazy. She was beginning to feel light headed, her body going limp in his arms. "No no no! Hang in there River! We're almost there!" He wasn't sure if she even heard him.

It was a mad dash to the TARDIS, but the Doctor reached it in minutes. Although it only took him minutes to reach, River was completely unconscious by the time the Doctor carried her into the TARDIS. "Come on River! Stay with me!" He ran to the sick bay, laying her down on the bed. He was able to examine her wounds more thoroughly now. Large burns covered her right side. There was a laceration there to with he proceeded to put pressure on.

She let out a grunt of pain as he put pressure on her wound, the pain pulling her back to consciousness. "Oh god, River." Though he was relieved that she was conscious, she was still badly hurt. "I'm so sorry." He choked out as yellow light started emitting from his hands.

"Doctor?" She murmured, still confused as to what was going on, "What's happening?" She looked at his glowing hands, "What are you doing?" She tried to push his hands away from her. He kept them in place despite her protests. The light grew brighter before it dimmed. River's soft skin was underneath his fingers instead of the burns.


	12. My Only Sunshine

He pulled his hands away and looked up at her. "I thought I was going to lose you."

"Doctor! What have I told you about using your energy on me? It's a waste, it's stupid and it's irresponsible!" She moved to slap him, angry that he was wasting years of her life on her.

"Ow!" He rubbed his now red cheek. "It was not irresponsible!" He rebutted. "Those burns were covering over 70% of your body! And would almost definitely have gotten infected! You could barely breathe and you were going in and out of consciousness! I couldn't give you any medication because you're pregnant, the best I could've done is burn cream. Maybe it was stupid, but it was worth getting slapped for."

"But you know that I hate it when you do that! Now what will happen when you need that energy? It won't be there because you wasted it on me!" She made to slap him again.

This time he blocked her, catching her by the wrist. "I'll can't promise that I won't use it on you. Just like you can't promise to stay out of danger." He smiled. "But I'll do my best to use medicine before resorting to healing you."

She tried to pull her wrist away from him, "I'm still angry with you..." She whispered, looking away from him. She almost wanted to stay angry, since it was keeping her mind from thinking about what had happened in the elevator.

"Angry at me for saving your life. I can live with that." He kissed the back of her hand.

Her eyes grew wide and she clutched onto his arm, "Are the babies alright?" She asked frantically, the realization that something could be wrong with them suddenly crossing her mind. He pulled over the ultrasound and examined Amelia. freya would still be safe since she was shielded off. "Is she okay?" She asked, watching him closely, praying that nothing was wrong and that she hadn't shielded herself off.

"She's a bit weak from lack of oxygen." He looked up at River's worry etched face. "She's okay, River, she's fine. You just need stay on bed rest for a few days so both of you can regain some strength."

She closed her eyes to hide the tears that filled her eyes, " Will you help me to our bed?"

"Sure." He gently got her out of the cot and put an arm around her waist, supporting her as the walked. She leaned against him, mostly letting him lead her back to their room.

"Why does this happen to us?" She whispered once she was settled in bed.

"I.. I honestly couldn't say." He stroked the side of her head. That was a lie. He blamed himself. He always blamed himself. Everyone who ever got close to him got hurt because of him. It was his fault.

She leaned into his touch, "It's my fault, isn't it. I should have been more careful, more protective..." She turned her head so he couldn't see the tears that slipped down her cheeks.

"No, River. If anything it's my fault. I convinced you to come to the class." He looked down at his hands. "This always happens. Everyone I love or care for always gets hurt because of me. I ruin their lives. I get them hurt, I lose them. They're fine before they meet me." He didn't exactly realize that he was saying this out loud. She turned to look at him, her heart breaking for him.

"That's not true." She whispered, leaning over and hugging him tightly, "This isn't your fault, nothing is your fault because you know what? The people who travel with you, their lives become so much better because of you. We get to see amazing things that nobody else gets to see. We all know the risks, but we choose to accept them because you make our lives so much better."

"Really?" He had begun to cry again.

"Yes, of course." She smiled weakly, brushing the tears away from his cheeks, pressing a kiss to his forehead, "I love you."

"I love you, too. More than I can hold in my hearts." He held her close, not wanting to let go.

She pressed another kiss to the side of his head, holding him tightly. "The girls love you too."

He smiled. "I almost wish they could stay in there forever. Safe and sound. Protected from all of the things we have to face." He paused. "But then again. I can't wait for them to arrive."

She laughed, "Well I'm certainly glad they're coming out soon. Being pregnant is rather frustrating. I can't do half the things I could normally do, and the hormones are driving me mad."

He shifted so he was laying next to her. "I think it's cute when you're mad."

She raised an eyebrow, "Cute? Cute isn't exactly what I want you to be thinking when I'm angry with you."

"You're not always angry with me. And when you are, I'm definitely terrified."

She giggled, moving so she could rest her head against his chest. "Terrified? Am I really _that _scary?"

"You've obviously never been slapped by an angry pregnant woman."

"I'm sorry, my love. I didn't realize I hit you so hard, I didn't mean to. Do you need me to kiss it better?" She teased.

"Yes please." He just wanted an excuse to kiss his wife. She smiled, kissing the spot where she had slapped him, then kissing his lips. He kissed her back, running a hand through her soft hair. "River Song. My River Song. You are positively the most wonderful thing in the universe."

Her smile grew and she pressed her forehead against his, "That's not true, _you're_ the most wonderful thing in the universe."

"That makes our children the most amazing because they're half of both of us." He pointed out.

Her smile faltered as she looked down at her belly, "Do-Do you think I'm going to be a good Mum?" She asked, biting her lip.

"Of course you're going to be a good mum. You're going to be a great mum!" He told her.

"But why do you think that?" She looked up at him, looking rather worried.

"Because you're already a good mother. Even though they're not born yet, you've took care of them, protected them, and loved them with all of your hearts. And that's what great mother's do."

She smiled weakly, cuddling more against him, "I'm afraid I'm not going to be good at all those things once they're born. It's easy now because they're right here, but once they're born...I don't know, I just don't want to ruin their lives."

"Well nobody's life is perfect. There are bad things, but there are also good things. There's running and laughing and fish fingers and custard. You'll be a great mother River and the best thing about parenting is that you don't have to do it alone. I'll be here and we can figure it together."

She nodded, not even realizing that tears had started running down her cheeks, wetting his shirt. "I'm sorry, like I said, my hormones are driving me mad." She whispered.

"It's okay. It's fine." He rubbed her back. "It natural to feel like that. I'm nervous and I'm not even pregnant."

She sniffled, the tears still sliding down her cheeks, "Really? You're nervous?"

"Of course I'm nervous. I haven't been a father in hundreds of years. They get to spend all of their time with you. And what if they don't like me?"

"Of course they'll like you. They love you already." She took his hand and placed it on her belly, "Amelia tells me all the time how much she loves it when you talk to her and she can feel your hands." She smiled softly, drying her tears, "They love you _so _much."

He beamed. "We're going to be amazing parents." His face lit up when he felt Amelia's small foot brush against his hand.

"I hope you're right." She smiled when his face lit up. "You think your Dad is going to be wonderful at raising you, don't you sweetie?"

_Absolutely! But what's a 'fish fingers and custard'? _

She laughed, _It's food that your Father seems to think is delicious. _

_You seem to think the opposite. _

_Yes I do, it's not very good if you ask me, but don't tell your father I said that, he'll only get defensive. _

_It'll be our secret! _She was excited to have a little secret the the Doctor didn't know about.

"What are you two laughing about?"

"Nothing." River giggled, knowing that it would frustrate him, "Just a little secret between me and Amelia."

"Are you planning something? I don't like being teamed up against."

"We're not planning anything." She said innocently.

"Don't make me come over there." He growled playfully.

"If you really want to know, you're going to have to make me tell you." She giggled. "Yeah well maybe I will." He moved up so he could kiss her. She kissed him back, grabbing fistfuls of his shirt and pulling him down against her. He exclaimed a little surprised a to sudden movement but quickly gained his balance.

She pulled back, smiling up at him, "I'm still not telling you."

"Is that a challenge. Dr. Song?"

She shrugged, "Maybe. What are you going to do about it?"

He smirked. "Do you really want to know?"

She raised an eyebrow, "Yes I do."

He kissed down her body until he reached her thigh. He settled between her legs, hiking up the skirt of her dress and pausing to take in the sent of her. She stared down at him, her chest already heaving with anticipation. "Last chance. Are you going to tell me?"

"In your dreams." He moved his head closer to her and began licking her. She tried to hold back groan, "Doctor..."

He grinned against her skin. He lapped up her juices and sucked lightly on her clit before maneuvering his tongue inside of her. She let out a cry of absolute delight, trying to grind her hips down into his tongue. He went deeper making sure sure no part was left untouched. She moans grew progressively louder, much louder than they should have been with Amelia right there, awake and listening.

He pulled out. "River, either you're going to have to be quieter or I'm going to have to stop."

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'll be quieter. Just don't stop." Her heart pounded as she looked at him pleadingly. He smiled, resuming his actions, a bit more forcefully. She let out a little yelp as he started harder this time, trying her hardest to keep quiet. He moved his long fingers inside of her, moving them in and out as he continued to lick her. Her hips bucked towards him as her nails clawed at the sheets.

"You know, i-it doesn't matter w-what you d-do, I'm not t-telling." She managed to say.

"Oh really? And what if I stop all together?" He pulled his fingers out closed his mouth. "Will you tell me now?"

She sat up so she could see him properly, a frown painted across her lips, "Well now I'm definitely not telling you."

He thought a moment. He smirked mischievously making River shift in anticipation. In a swift move, he plunged his fingers back into her and curled them in just the right way. River cried out in pleasure, not bothering anymore to be quiet. He ground his tongue against her clit harder than ever sending her all the ways over the edge. She called his name over and over as her pleasure washed over her leaving her body quivering.

He grinned, crawling back up next to her and kissing her cheek as she caught her breath. "Tell me now?"

She smirked and rolled over on her side, pulling the blankets up to her chin. "Never."

It wasn't long before she fell asleep, nestled with her back against his chest.


	13. Surprise

**CH 13**

The Doctor tried to keep her entertained for the next couple of days. Bed rest was 'boring' as River had put it, no matter how many chess games they played. The Doctor came in to the room with tea mugs in his hands. He didn't bother to turn in the light. He sat down on the edge of the bed, placing a kiss to her forehead. Today River was finally allowed out of the bed other than to use the bathroom and he was wondering how she'd react.

She grumbled as she awoke, yawning and looking up at him. "Morning." She murmured.

"Sleep well?" He asked, snickering at her not wanting to wake up.

She glared at him, obviously not in the mood, "What are you laughing at?" She struggled to push herself into a sitting position, crossing her arms across her chest.

"Nothing. Here." He handed her the warm tea.

Her glare melted away as she took the tea, "Thank you." She let out a small grunt of discomfort, pressing a hand to the base of her stomach.

"You okay?" He asked, concerned.

She nodded, rubbing her belly lightly, "I'm fine, it's just Braxton Hicks contractions. They happen occasionally, it's like my body's way of getting ready for the real labor." She knew he would panic if she didn't explain.

"Oh." He said, calming down. "Right. Of course." He shook his head, snapping himself out of his thoughts.

"Are you alright?" She asked, rubbing his arm lightly.

"Yeah. I'm okay. I'm the king of okay." He insisted. "And you are even better because today you're off bed rest." He hopped off the bed and extended a hand.

Her whole face lit up at his words, "Really? I can finally get out of bed?" She took his hand, pulling herself out of bed.

"I'm surprised you didn't remember when you woke up." He gave her a kiss.

She kissed him back, wrapping her arms around his neck, "Well, I forgot. It feels so good to stretch my legs."

"Come on. I've got a surprise for you." He said excitedly.

"Oh a surprise? What is it?" She asked, her excitement matching his.

"If I told you it wouldn't be a surprise now would it." He bopped her on the nose before leading her to the nursery.

She giggled, letting him lead her to the nursery. "Do you want me to close my eyes?"

"No. You might trip." He paused before the closed door. He glanced back at her and opened it. Inside the rug, which used to have nothing on it, was strewn with toys like stuffed adiposes, wind up cybermen, and even a mini TARDIS. "I make most of them" He said.

River stared at all the toys for several minutes, one hand covering her mouth. "Oh, Doctor..." She breathed, walking into the room and picking up a few of the toys to look at them, "You made these?" She asked, almost in disbelief. "They're amazing."

"Well, I had some spare time." He beamed, feeling rather proud of himself. "And I thought that when we tell the girls about our adventures, they'd like a visual."

She hugged him tightly, "Thank you." She whispered, "That was so thoughtful of you."

"I do try." He chuckled, hugging her back. She laughed, squeezing him a bit more before finally letting go.

"Well you're certainly in a good mood." He pointed out. "Enjoying being out of bed?"

"I'm loving being out of bed, and I think you would too if you had to sit in bed and do nothing for days."

"Oi! You had things to do! I thought those were very fun chess games."

"Really? That's not what you were saying when I was beating you." She crossed her arms.

"Well.. I -er- _interesting_ might be a better word for it. You're to only one who's beaten me in a very long time."

She smirked, "Maybe it's because I'm smarter than you." She teased.

"That doesn't make me not cleaver." He blushed a bit because he knew she was right.

She giggled, kissing his red cheeks, "You're not even going to argue about not being as smart as me?"

"Maybe.. Yes.. no.. well yes.. but you are .. I mean... smarter..."

She laughed again, "Alright, alright. Now need to get all flustered."

"I can't really help it. You make me speechless." He smiled.

It was her turn to blush now, "Oh, stop it."

"It's true though." He kissed her cheek.

She beamed nuzzling her nose against his shoulder, "You're so good to me."

"It wouldn't be any other way."

She laced her fingers in his, "You know what would make me _really _happy? If you and I went into the kitchen and had some nice, warm, freshly made chocolate chip cookies for breakfast."

"Cookies for breakfast? Alright." He chuckled. "They might take a bit." He said as he started for the kitchen.

"Mmm, I don't mind." She trailed along after him.

He started pulling of ingredients and setting them on the counter when they got there. She set the oven before moving to start making the cookies. "Will you grab the flour?" He asked as he started mixing the milk and eggs. She nodded, taking the flour out of the cabinet and opening it for him. She took a handful of the flour and threw it at his back, giggling. "Hey!" He exclaimed turning around "Why'd you do that?" But he was already grabbing the flour and tossing it back at her.

"Doctor!" She cried, reaching to grab another fistful of flour, throwing it at his chest. The impact caused it to cloud in the air. He reached a hand in the mix of eggs and milk and flicked it at her. She gasped as the mix hit her, she took the bag of flour, dumping half to contents onto him.

"Oi!" He practically looked like a ghost. He grabbed her by the waist and wrapped his arms around her, getting the flour all over her.

"You're ruining my dress." She protested, though she didn't make any attempt to move out of his arms.

"You started it" He laughed. "I don't know if there's enough to finish the cookies."

"Well then we'd better make an emergency trip to the store to get more then because this most certainly is an emergency."

"I don't think we have to go out. The TARDIS can provide some." He said, not wanting her to go outside.

"Are you sure? It might be nice to get out of the TARDIS for a little while..."

His smile faltered a bit. "I... I don't want you leaving the TARDIS, River. I know you want to, but the Silence are watching us more than ever now. I want you to be safe."

She stayed quiet for several minutes, her face falling. "I'm sorry, you're right." She sat down in one of the kitchen chairs, her head in her hands.

His hearts ached for her. "River... It won't be like this forever." He knelt down in front of her, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Hey. It's going to be okay."

"But it _will_ be like this forever." She whispered, clearing her throat to keep her voice from breaking, "Once they're born, they'll still be in constant danger. I just...I'm sorry."

"_We've_ always been in danger. Before you were pregnant, before we even knew each other. And we still have adventures and dates without being shot at." He took her hands, holding the firmly in her lap. "It'll be the same. One day, maybe not soon, but soon enough. We'll all be able to go out as a family and be safe. We just have to be patient."

She squeezed his hands, looking down at him with a sad smile, "I want to be able to take the girls on adventures one day. I want them to see all the amazing things that you've shown me. I know that we'll have to wait a while, but it will be worth it, I know that."

He returned the smile, looking a little more hopeful than she was. "Well then, how about those cookies?" He looked over his shoulder at the messy kitchen.

"Mm, yes I'd really like to get back to mak-" She stopped talking, squeezing her eyes shut, a look of discomfort coming across her face as her hands moved to her belly.

"River!" He whipped his head back around, his face etched with concern.

"It's alright, I'm fine." She assured him, opening her eyes to look at him, "It's just Braxton Hicks again."

"A-are you sure?" He remembered how she looked earlier when she had a Braxton Hick, but this one looked stronger than that. Maybe it was just his imagination, but he couldn't help but worry.

"I pretty sure." She didn't want to worry him, she wasn't positive that it was only a Braxton Hick, but she wanted to be sure before she started making him panic. He nodded and breathed out slowly. He really shouldn't be that panicky, but he could help it.

"Right. Cookies." He tried to get focused again. "Shall we start again?"

She nodded slowly, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you like that... Are you alright?"

"Yeah... yeah. Absolutely. I'm great." He waved off the question going back to the shelf. "Promise not to throw food at me this time?"

She laughed, "I don't know if I can promise that." She didn't get up from the chair, watching his flour covered back. He chuckled, but knew that she probably wouldn't. In no time, the cookies were in the oven and he set the timer for ten minutes before sitting across from her. It only took a few minutes for the smell of fresh baked cookies to fill the room.

River stood up, walking over and sitting in his lap, "This is much more comfortable." She smiled.

He placed his arms around her. "Indeed. I still can't believe you'd want cookies for _breakfast. _Oh, we should have ice cream to go with it!" He seemed pleased with the idea.

Her face lit up, "Oh! That's actually a lovely idea. We could have green tea ice cream!" It was a bit of an odd request since she typically hated green tea.

"Since when did you like green tea?" He raised an eyebrow. Though one of his favorites, he could remember her making disgusted faces at the mere mention of it.

She shrugged, "I'm _really _craving it now. I thought all my intense cravings were supposed to be gone by now."

"Timelord pregnancy." He reminded her. "There are a lot of differences between this and that of a human pregnancy, thought most of them are small."

She raised an eyebrow, "Are there any differences in labor that I should know about?"

He thought. "Well, some women complain about feeling a strong ache between contractions that's similar to what they felt when they had braxton hicks. It's not very common and I think it had to do with the baby's position." He scratched his chin, pondering about it more in his head.

"Hmm, interesting." She slid off his lap, walking over to the oven, "Are our cookies almost done? I'm starving." The timer beeped before he had a chance to answer. He grabbed the over mitt.

"Watch out, this'll be hot." He opened the oven and pulled out the pan. River gripped onto the counted as he removed the pan from the oven, suddenly feeling another contraction. Her knuckles were white as she held onto the edge of the counter, though her face was calm, not wanting to alarm him of anything that was happening. He set it onto the counter, oblivious to River's white knuckles.

"Voila!" He smiled, looking at her.

She forced a smile which ended up looking more like a grimace, "Would you mind getting the ice cream for me?" She asked, though she was closer to the fridge, she didn't want to move because of the rather harsh pain.

"Sure." He walked over to retrieve the ice cream, giving her a suspicious look as he passed her.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" She asked, finally relaxing as the contraction passed.

"No reason." He shrugged, setting the bowls and spoons beside the pint of ice cream. "You just.. Nothing."

She dished out the ice cream for them before beginning to eat. It was only ten minutes later when she felt another contraction, she was taken a bit by surprise, the pain showing on her face this time.

He paused his eating, an ice cream mustache on his upper lip. He jumped up and was at her side. "River..."

She grabbed for his hand, needing something to grip onto, "I-I don't think these are Braxton Hicks anymore."

"Why didn't you tell me?" He winced at the strength of her grip.

"I didn't want to scare you." She murmured, not even noticing him wince as she fought through the pain that had progressively gotten worse.

"I'm not scared." That was a bit of a lie, but he would be brave for her. "If anything I'm excited." He bent down again. We're about to be parents."

"I'm scared..." She admitted, biting her lip as she stared at him with wide eyes.

He stroked the side of her cheek. "I've never met a new parent who wasn't."


	14. Right by your side

**CH 14**

[A/N: There is still a lot more to this story, thank you for sticking around. Just to give you a time line, we're not even at the half way mark...]

She smiled weakly, shutting her eyes, "We need to get ready. We need blankets, towels, scissors and all those other things they told us about at the class." She really hopped he had remembered since she didn't. "

Clamps and a bulb suction." He finished the list for her. "Don't worry. It's all taken care of."

"It is?" She asked, of course she was worried, she had been worried about this moment ever since she had found out she was pregnant, "You seem so calm."

"Well once you've had a false alarm or two, you get the hang of how to react." He tried to look as reassuring as possible. "Can you walk?"

She nodded, "I think I need some help getting up though."

He held out a hand for her. She took his hand, managing to get up with his assistance, then moved towards the door. He supported her weight as they walked through the halls. The bathroom was one of the big ones with a tub big enough for at least five people. The shelves were already stalked with the earlier listed items and the tub already full at the perfect temperature. She stripped off her clothes, eager to get into the water since she know it would relax her muscles.

"Doctor..." She said, pulling her hair up before sliding into the tub, "You said that my connection with Freya would come back when I went into labor..."

"Yes, I did." He perked, having momentarily forgotten about that. "Can... can you hear her?"

"I don't know." She murmured, closing her eyes to try and see if she could hear the baby.

_Mummy? _The voice seemed kind of timid and unsure.

She smiled when she heard the voice, _Hello Sweetie. _

_Mummy, what happened? It was really, really quiet. Even Amelia was quiet. _

_You were just...um, sleeping for a while, but everything's alright now. Daddy and I are all ready to finally meet you. _

_Is that why it keeps getting so cramped? _

She laughed_, Yes sweetie, that's exactly why. _Another contraction hit, making her let out a small whimper in pain.

The Doctor had been getting supplies off the shelf. He put them down next to the tub and was at her side again. It was rare that he ever heard River whimper. She squeezed his hand tightly, trying to suppress another whimper. "Breathe, River." He instructed. She took in a few deep breaths, trying to remember what the instructor in the class had been trying to teach them about breathing. "Good." He kissed her forehead. "I know it hurts, but you've got to remember to breathe."

She nodded, "I know, I know." Her contractions were getting rather close together, and she tried her hardest not to groan too much.

He stroked her hair, "Do you want me to come in with you?"

Her head rest against the ledge of the tub so she could look up at him, "If you want to." He slipped out of his clothes, leaving his boxers on and sat behind her in the tub, tracing circles on her belly. She lay back against him, her head resting beneath his chin. She tried to relax before the next contraction hit, her body tensing as her nails clawed at the sides of the tub. He could feel her skin grow tight under his fingertips with the contraction. He did his best to sooth her her, whispering sweet nothings in her ear and reminding her to breathe. Just the sound of his voice comforted her a great deal, but she still let out a pained moan.

"W-We need to check how far d-dilated I am." She breathed, her nails digging into the palms of her hands. He nodded, shifting to the front of her, between her legs. He tried not to look to squeamish as he checked her dilation. She closed her eyes, resting as she waited for him. He held his fingers up about seven centimeters apart. "This much. That's only seven centimeters, though."

"What do you mean only? I only have to be 10 centimeters, right?" She looked a bit alarmed, wanting the pain to be over as soon as possible.

"Yes. I guess we have to wait a bit longer." He resumed his position behind her. "But if you feel the need to push, you should listen to your body."

She readjusted herself against him. "Trust me, I will." She groaned rather loudly as the next contraction came, feeling a bit of pressure building. He reached over the side of the tub and grabbed a cloth. He dipped it in the water and ran it along her forehead, wiping away the bit of sweat the had started to form. "Thank you." She managed to say, trying to breath through what seemed to her like constant pain by this point.

Twenty minutes later the pressure was much stronger and close to unbearable, "I think I have to push." He stayed where he was, but put his hand under her thighs to help hold her legs apart.

"Then push."

She gathered up all her strength, beginning to push with a loud moan of pain. "Nghh!"

"That's it, good!" He cheered her on. She whimpered again as she kept going, willing it to be over soon.

He leaned forwards a bit to peer down between her legs. He could see the small bump of one of their daughters crowning heads. He didn't know which one, though he had a hunch that it was Freya. "The heads almost out, River. You can pause."

She collapsed back against his chest, her chest heaving and her face flushed deep red. He ran the cloth along her forehead again, pausing a moment and keeping it there longer. "Just relax."

She looked up at him through tired eyes, "She's almost here." She whispered.

"Almost." He repeated knowing that she still had to get through the rest of this then do it all over again.

"I'm surprised you're so relaxed." She took a deep breath, preparing to push again, "I thought for sure you'd be panicking the whole time."

"So did I" He murmured. "But panicking would've just made everything more stressful than it needed to be." He was also making an effort to stay calm for River's sake. Being calm seemed to help her stay calm too.

She nodded, understanding. She started to push again, biting her lip as she tried to find something to grip onto. Everything felt like it was burning and she tried to hold back a cry of pain that ended up sounding like a strangled groan. He let go of her legs and held her hands, holding them tightly against her shoulders. She clutched onto his hands, trying to keep up her breathing just as he had been instructing her to. Within the next few pushed, the head fully emerged. The Doctor moved his hands down between her leg to support the head.

She didn't want to stop and rest at this point, but had to ask, "Have you got her head? Does everything feel alright?"

He nods. "She's fine. Neck is clear." He assured her. "River, I can feel her little ears and nose!" He said excitedly. "Do you want to feel?'

She nodded, relieved that there was nothing wrong. He reached one of his hands up to take her and lead it down to their child's face. "Oh, Doctor..." She breathed, her fingers lightly floating along the small features.

"You're so close, just a few more pushes." She nodded again, the feeling of the baby motivating her to push even harder than before.

He could feel the shoulders slip out. "That's it, one more push!" She let out a strangled cry as she pushed one more time, finally feeling the rest of the baby's body slip out. He brought her to the surface, simultaneously reaching for the bulb suction for her mouth and nose. The infant let out a loud wail as soon as the suction was removed. River stared at the newborn for a moment, her expression absolutely amazed.

"Wow," was all he could say for a bit. Freya waved her arms about, smiling up at her parents who seemed completely dazed that they had made a whole other person.

"She's precious." River whispered, looking down at the Freya's adorable smiling face. "Hello there, darling." She smiled back down at her.

_Mummy! It's much roomier out here. But you better not make me do that again because it wasn't very comfortable._Though there wasn't much, Freya had a small tuft of strawberry blonde curly hair on the top of her head.

"Don't worry, sweetheart, you won't have to do that again." She smiled, holding the tiny baby close to her chest.

The Doctor was peering over her shoulder wearing a ridiculous smile. "She looks just like you!"

"Do you think so?" She continued to smile down at the baby, unable to take her eyes off of her.

"Yes. Well, except for her eyes. She's got my eyes. " He pointed out, giving River a kiss.

"She's perfect." She whispered, holding the baby a bit closer to her in an effort to keep her warm.

"Oh. Here." He handed her a tiny hat that they usually make babies wear to keep warm.

She put the hat on her, then kissed her forehead, "Do you want to hold her?" She asked.

He bit his lip. "What if I drop her? I tend to be clumsy with these kind of things..."

She smiled up at him, "You won't drop her, just relax." She turned, gently placing Freya in his arms, "Now, mind her head." She was small enough that he could hold her in one arm.

"She's so tiny."

River beamed and reached for the scissors and clamps to cut the cord, "She is..." She ran a finger along Freya's tiny arm, "It's so nice to finally see you, my love."

Freya smiled up at them with tired eyes and yawned, nuzzling into the Doctor's arms not noticing that her mother was cutting what had connected them to each other for the last eight months. _I like being held by you guys. _

_"_Oh, are you sleepy? Doctor, maybe we sh-" She was cut off by a sharp pain in her belly, groaning and clutching her stomach. He reached his spare arm for her to hold, mindful not to disturb Freya too much as she drifted to sleep.

"Breathe."

She clutched onto his arm, breathing deeply. "I don't know if I can do this again."

"You can, River. I know you can do do this." He wrapped Freya in a blanket and placed her in a basket that he had gotten when he was getting the supplies and faced back towards River, placing his hands on her arms. "You are one of the strongest people I know. You can do it."

She whimpered loudly, pressing her forehead against his chin, "I knew it wouldn't be fun, but I didn't think it would be this painful." He hated seeing her in pain, especially when he could do nothing about it.

He reached his hand around her and put pressure on her lower back. "Does that help?"

She wrapped her arms around his neck, breathing shakily, "Yes, that actually helps a lot." He continued massaging her back, glad he could be more useful than just sitting there. She groaned again, trying to lean back into his hand to get more pressure on her back. He pressed a bit harder, obliging to her request. "I wish I could do more for you."

"D-Don't be silly, y-you're doing p-plenty." She panted, sweat collecting on her forehead and chest. He kissed her forehead, not moving his hands.

"You are so strong. I would never be able to do this."

She laughed weakly, "I think you would be able to." She murmured.

"Maybe if it was an alternative to you being in pain."

She shook her head, "But I couldn't bare to see you suffer."

"Nor I you. But I don't think it quiet counts as suffering if you get a family at the end."

She groaned, rubbing her belly, "I agree, but it would be really nice to just get the family without the pain."

"I can't make it painless, but I can try my best to ease it."

She shook her head, "I'm alright." She murmured, tensing as she felt another contraction.

"You are amazing." He corrected. "Absolutely amazing."

"Doctor..." She breathed, sweat running down her forehead, "Something doesn't feel right."

His felt a pit of fear in his stomach. "W-what is it?"

She moaned, clearly in much more pain than she had been during the last contraction, "I-I don't know, but I know something's wrong..."

"Okay, um. Okay." He wasn't panicking. Definitely. Not. Panicking. "I have to check her position." He told her before reaching in and feeling for Amelia. She groaned, laying back, her breathing heavy. "River..." He looked back up at her. "She's... she's transverse. She's sideways."

"So what- what does that mean? What's going to happen?" She groaned again, trying hard not to let in turn into anything louder.

"I have to turn her until she's facing the right way with out getting her tangled it the cord." He said, trying to remember everything they had learned about breach or transverse babies. "It's going to hurt..."

She swallowed, trying to hide the fear in her eyes, "Okay, okay then do it." She would do anything to make sure the baby would be alright. "Just make sure she's okay."

He took a breath, praying he wouldn't screw this up and cursing himself for the pain he was going to cause her. He reached in a bit further, getting a good grip on Amelia and began maneuvering her.

"Uugh!" She tried to hold back her cries at the pain that surged through her core, finally sobbing out in pain. She was starting to bleed, trying her hardest not to cry out any more, not wanting him to feel bad.

"O-okay..." He brought his hand back up. His hearts beat fast when he saw that it was coated in blood. "Push!"

She whimpered, struggling to push, the color draining from her face from the blood loss. "Come on, Riv! You can do it, push!" He put a hand to steady her shaking legs. She fought against the pain, doing the best she could to bare down. He looked up at her exhausted face "Okay, good. Relax a moment."

She fell back against the side of the tub, feeling rather light-headed, "Is she alright now?"

"I think so.. Yes." He nodded. "But this bleeding is rather concerning."

"W-what bleeding?" She asked, unaware of what was happening, although the water in the tub was starting to turn very, _very _red.

"You're... Oh, god." He ran a hand through his hair, as he looked at the water. "We need get this baby out. Now."

"D-Doctor, w-what's going on." She murmured, looking at him through exhausted, half-closed eyes.

"I don't... I don't know!" He didn't know if it was Amelia or River that was bleeding but he had a good reason to assume it was River. "Push!"

She resumed pushing, gripping onto the sides of the tub, hardly suppressing her cries. He caught the head as it slipped out. "Almost there! Keep going!"

She shook her head, "I can't, I can't do it anymore." She cried, her face had paled even further.

"Yes you can, River. You can. You can make Daleks run in fear and you can defeat whole armies. You can do this."

Encouraged by his words, she bore down once again, her cry closer to a scream. "Aagh!"

The tiny body slid into the Doctor's hands and he brought the baby above water. "Is she okay?" River whispered, her curls matted to her forehead.

"She's perfect." His fears disappeared for a moment as he stared down at Amelia.

"Good...good..." She murmured, her eyes closing and her breathing shallow. He quickly cut the cord and wrapped her in a blanket, placing her next to her sister.

"River...? Open your eyes." With this much bleeding, he couldn't be sure whether she was resting or not. She didn't respond to him, just sank a bit deeper into the red water. "River!" He rushed to lift her back up. "Come on, River. Stay with me!"

"I'm...I'm so tired." She murmured as he lifted her, her whole body pale from the amount of blood she had lost.

"J-just hang in there a little longer..." He scooped her out of the tub and wrapped her in a towel before rushing to the medbay.

"Doctor...the babies..." She didn't really know what was happening, but she was aware that he was taking her out of the room, taking her away from the two newborns.

"They're alright" He put her on the bed and sprinted back to get them, returning less than a moment later. He set them down in two small glass cots and was back by her side. She managed to smile softly when she was him return with the children, her eyes fluttering shut again.

"No no no!" This wasn't supposed to happen. Not like this, not here. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He hooked her to a blood I.V. but she was losing blood faster than he could give it. She started to wake again as he hooked her up to the I.V. She had no idea what was going on, completely out of it. She looked over at the children longingly.

"Can I hold her?" She asked hoarsely, wanting a chance to hold Amelia.

"N-no, not yet. " He felt terrible that he was denying her that right. She was weak and he wasn't sure she could even lift her hand without shaking. "I still have to stop the bleeding."

"I'll be fine." She insisted, still looking at Amelia, "I really want to hold her..." She whispered, her hands were shaking though she was unaware.

"I know... I know. But it's important that I make sure you're okay first." He examined her with the ultrasound. "I-it looks like you ruptured an artery..."

"W-What does that mean?" She asked, her teeth chattering.

"It means you're going to bleed out if I don't stop it soon" His head was pounding, but he was able to think straight enough to get medicine. It was clear fluid in a large syringe.

"What is that?" Her whole body was visibly trembling now, she closed her eyes, "Promise me you'll take care of them. Promise me they'll be safe, and nothing will happen to them."

"River, you are not going to die." She couldn't die. He'd seen her die and though that day was still coming, that day was not today. "I promise they'll be safe and I promise you'll be there to see that. This... this should stop the bleeding." He hoped.

"You're going to be the best father in the universe, do you know that?" She looked up at him, smiling weakly.

"But I can't do it without you. I won't do it without you." He glanced down, relieved that the bleeding had begun to slow.

She reached for his hand, squeezing it lightly, "If you had to, you absolutely could do it without me. But you don't have to worry because I have no intention of leaving you just yet."

"Ever. Don't leave me ever." He pulled her into a hug, not realizing that there were tears on his cheeks.

"It's alright, my love." She whispered, seeing the tears on his cheeks, "I promise, I will never, _ever_ leave you." Of course she knew nothing about the Library and that one day, she would break her promise.


	15. My corner of the sky

**CH 15**

He held her close, hoping that perhaps doing so would somehow prevent that day from ever happening. She kissed the side of his head, the color starting to come back to her skin. "I love you." She murmured, holding him as tightly as she could.

"I love you, too. More than my hearts can hold." He pressed their forehead together, wanting it to stay like that. His family safe and Rive alive.

She smiled, kissing the tip of his nose. "You know, as much as I love sitting her and cuddling with you, I would really like to hold my daughter now."

"Oh, yes. Right." He hopped off the bed and retrieved Amelia and Freya who were starting to wake up. She held her arms out to take Amelia, though her hands were still a bit shaky. He handed her off to River and sat next to them, holding Freya.

"She was worth the trouble."

"She certainly was" River smiled down at Amelia, running her finger along the baby's cheek, "Hello there, little one."

Amelia made a sleepy sort of noise and yawned, still tired from her nap. _Hello, mumma. _

She looked up at the Doctor, beaming, "She's absolutely beautiful."

"I can hardly tell them apart. I bet they'll take advantage of that when they're older." He chuckled. "Though Amelia does have your eyes. At least we can tell them apart that way."

"And she has your nose." River kissed her forehead, cradling Amelia a bit tighter as she nestled into her chest.

"I presume that's a good thing?" At least they didn't have his chin.

"Yes it's a good thing! It's better than getting this!" She teased, poking his chin.

"Oi! It's not that bad! Is it?"

She laughed, leaning in for a kiss, "Well, I think it's quite adorable, but I don't know if they would think so if they inherited it."

He smiled against her lips. "I'm glad she has your eyes. I love your eyes."

She looked up at him, her eyes sparkling, " You do? I didn't know that."

"Of course I do! Did I not mention that? They're like the ocean after a storm. They're absolutely beautiful."

"Thank you." She beamed, pressing another kiss to his lips before looking down at Amelia. "Did you hear that, my love? Daddy thinks our eyes are like the ocean after a storm."

_Will you take me and Freya? I've never seen one, what does it look like?_

"Of course we will, but not until you're just a bit older." She looked down at her tiredly. "I think maybe you and Freya should go down for a nap, you've had a very busy day"

_So have you. I heard you yelling. Are you okay?_

"I'm perfect now that you're here." She whispered, then smiled up at the Doctor.

He smiled back at her. "You need to get some rest."

"Can I stay in the nursery? I can sleep in the rocking chair, that way I can stay with them."

"I'd rather you in here. You still have to recover. But if you really want, they could sleep in here with you."

She nodded, "That would be lovely. You'll stay too, right?"

"Absolutely. I wouldn't be able to sleep without you."

She looked back down at Amelia as the newborn drifted off to sleep, "Do we have any extra blankets? It's a bit cold in here."

"Yes, I think so." He pulled a couple blankets from the closet, handing one to River and putting the other one the couch next to the bed where he was going to sleep.

"Why are you going to sleep all the way over there?" She moved over a bit so there was some space beside her, "You can sleep in the bed with me. There's enough room for both of us as long as we squeeze."

He lay down next to her on his side so they both fit perfectly. She smiled, practically glowing with happiness with her whole family surrounding her. "Well, will you look at that. We did it. We made a family."

She laughed, looked over at the two babies whom had been placed back in the small beds, "We certainly did." Her smile faltered for a moment, "Do you think my parents would have been proud? Do you think they would have been happy to have grandchildren?"

"Absolutely. Though, I think Rory would've tried to come at me with his sword." He said, moving his arms around her.

Her smile slowly returned, "Don't worry, I wouldn't have let him touch a hair on your head." She kissed him softly, nestling in his arms.

"Amy would've been ecstatic."He chuckled at the thought of the squealing red head.

She smiled sadly, "I bet the would have loved to be here right now." He thought back to the day they lost Amy and Rory. He remembered the note.

"River... the note, it said they never saw me again..."

"I know, my love, I know." She soothed, pulling him closer to her, kissing the top of his head.

"No, Riv. It said they'd never see _me _again It didn't say anything about not seeing you."

"Haven't we already talked about this?" She whispered, not wanting to get her own hopes up, "How am I supposed to get to them? We can't bring the TARDIS back there and there is a good possibility that if I tried to use my vortex manipulator it would end...unwell to say the least."

"We can't bring the TARDIS to 1939. But they lived years after that. I could drop you off anywhere in their timestream after that year. Think about it, River. It could work!" His face was lit up with excitement about the idea.

She stared at him, still so afraid to get excited about something she wasn't sure could work. "Doctor...I-I don't know." He rubbed her arm, his tone a bit more gentle.

"We could at least try. I mean it's worth a shot."

She hid her face in his chest, breathing shakily, "I don't know if I can..." She whispered. He moved his hand to her back, making circles.

"You don't have to if you really don't want to. How 'bout you sleep and we talk more in the morning?"

She nodded slowly, "I think that's a good idea." He pulled the blanket a bit tighter around them, enjoying her touch.

She fell asleep soon after, cozied up in his arms. However, several hours later she was awoken by the screaming cries coming from first Freya then Amelia. The Doctor was already jumping up and picking up Freya when Amelia started wailing. River stumbled out of bed, almost collapsing on the floor due to her still weak legs. She quickly pushed herself up, moving to pick up Amelia. "It's alright, darling. Mummy's got you, you're alright." She murmured.

"You okay?" He asked, making sure she wasn't hurt. She nodded quickly, more concerned about the children than herself.

"How is she?" She asked, nodding towards Freya, while still trying to calm Amelia. He bounced her up and down a little.

"She's okay. Just a little upset." He glanced at Amelia "Probably hungry."

"Amelia probably is too. Alright, my loves, alright." She breathed, sitting down on the cot and adjusting her top so she could feed Amelia. He shifted his weight, still bouncing Freya, her sobs had turned into quiet whimpers. "Now...umm...I don't really know what I'm doing..." River murmured, cradling the infant to her breast. He came over next to her and looked down at what she was doing.

"Here. It's like this." He readjusted both of them until Amelia latched on.

She watched in silent amazement as Amelia nursed, "Oh, Doctor..." She breathed. He could help but chuckle at the fact that she was amazed by such a little thing.

"It's easy once you get the hang of it."

"Yeah..." She murmured, still looking down at Amelia lovingly. Freya's whines grew a bit louder.

"I think someone wants their turn." He smiled.

She looked up at Freya as Amelia finished, handing her off to the Doctor, "Will you burp her for me while I feed this one?" She asked, taking Freya from his arms, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

"Sure." He patted Amelia's back, not really noticing that he was bouncing. She looked up once Freya had begun to nurse.

"Doctor! You're going to make her spit up if you bounce her like that." Amelia let out a soft whimper, then a noise that sounded very much like she was going to spit up.

"Bounc-...? Oh." He stopped moving his knees. "I didn't realize I was even doing it."

She shook her head, "It's alright, I just don't want her to get sick." Amelia made another whimpering cry. He continued lightly patting her back, careful not to bounce this time.

"Why is she upset?"

"I-I don't know..." River looked a bit concerned. Amelia made a few more cries before letting out a tiny burp, settling down right after.

He giggled, "Such a fuss you make." He lifted her up holding her above his head and beaming before holding her back in his arms. Amelia gave him a toothless smile, gurgling happily. River smiled as she watched them, gently rubbing Freya's back.

He looked back at River, happiness radiated from his expression. He was so glad that They were okay after the complications. "How are you feeling?"

"Better." She whispered, even though she was still incredibly sore and completely exhausted. "Holding these two makes _everything_ worth it..."

"So... about what we talked about last night. What do you think?" He asked, hopeful.

Her smiled faltered, "Doctor...I really don't know. I know it seems like a wonderful idea, but it would mean just having to say goodbye all over again..."

"I know. You're right..." He recalled the many tears shed that day. "What'd she say? When you went to her to get the book published, I mean."

"She asked a lot about you, how you were doing and all..." River tried her best not to be bitter about it all. She hadn't actually seen her mother since Manhattan and had to get the book published through someone else. Her parents had left the afterword for the Doctor, but nothing for her. "She said she missed you, but they were happy with their new life too."

He smiled, imagining Amy and Rory laughing together in a coffee shop. It hurt less and less when he thought about them now. "I'm glad. Shame they won't be able to meet these two, but I guess that's just how the universe works."

"Yeah...I guess so..." She whispered, unable to pull the sadness out of her tone, not matter how much she tried.

He crouched down in front of her, still trying to maintain the happy mood. "Hey... What's wrong?"

She shook her head, trying to recover her happiness, "Nothing, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" If something was bothering her, he thought it best to be said now and not later. Thankfully for her, Freya started fussing in her arms, giving her an excuse not to answer his question.

"What's wrong, my love?" She asked, stroking the baby's curls, trying to hush her.

_My tummy hurts. _She whined.

"Alright, it's alright." She breathed, gently rubbing Freya's belly, trying to sooth her.

She hummed happily. _That helps._

She pressed kisses to her tummy, happy to hear that she was able to make her feel better. "We should get you and your sister washed up."

_A bath? I want bubbles! _She said excitedly.

She laughed, "Alright, come on then." Freya waved her arms about eagerly. The Doctor followed behind her. River was a bit unstable on her legs as she walked down the hallway to the bathroom.

He snaked an arm around her shoulder, steadying her a little. "You alright over there?"

"I just feel a bit...lightheaded." She leaned against him, holding Freya close. His expression quickly turned more concerned.

"You should take it easy." She almost laughed, not one to 'take it easy.'

"I'll be fine, sweetie. Could you start running their bath for me?"

"Sure." He slipped into the bathroom, hesitant to leave her if she wasn't feeling well. She leaned against the wall for support, her face a bit paler than usual as she bounced Freya in her arms. The sound of running water filled the halls and the Doctor reappeared in front of her. "Are you sure you're okay? He came of over to her, putting a hand on her arm.

She nodded, pressing her burning forehead against his chin, "I'm fine..."

"River, you're burning up!" He pulled a bit away from her, pressing the back of his hand to her forehead.

"Am I?" She quickly handed Freya to him, not wanting her to get ill if she was contagious. "Take her."

He took her a bit awkwardly with Amelia and his other arm, still wanting to tend to River. "Why don't you lie down? I'll come check on you after."

"But I want to help." She protested, "It's their first bath, I don't want to miss it."

"But you could be contagious. And it won't make you better any faster. You need to rest."

She grumbled unhappily, but stumbled off to her room, collapsing into bed. The TARDIS hummed around her, telepathically soothing her swimming mind. She lay awake for several minutes, worrying about how the Doctor was handling the twins on his own, among other things. As the hum of the TARDIS grew stronger, she finally fell asleep in a pile of warm blankets and pillows.

The Doctor was there when she opened her eyes, bouncing the girls on his knees and humming a little tune. She smiled sleepily, staying silent for another few minutes so she wouldn't disturb the scene before her. He finished the tune, smiling like the goof he was and glanced over to River. "Oh! You're awake!"

"Mmm." She hummed, radiating up at him, still looking rather exhausted. Giving birth to the twins had certainly taken a toll on her health. "How are my girls?" She asked, looked at the two babies on his knees, "I bet they didn't even miss their mummy."

"They missed you very much!" He told her. "I'm surprised you didn't hear them, they were being very loud about it. Though bubbles did make them feel better." He sat on the edge on the bed. "You feeling better?"

"Yes, a bit." She smiled a bit more, "So they did miss me then?" She held her arms out to take one of them.

"Absolutely." He handed Freya to her, letting Amelia explore the space in front of him. He checked her forhead again with his hand. "You're still quite warm."

"I'll be fine." She murmured, pushing his hand away as she settled Freya in her lap.

"And I don't doubt that for a second, but I'm still going to make you take your medicine." He bopped her playfully on the nose.

She raised an eyebrow, looking slightly amused as he bopped her nose, "What medicine? I'm really alright, I don't need medicine."

"Yes you do, River. You've got a small infection. Nothing major, but you still need some antibiotics." He got up, retriving them from the cabinet. She rolled her eyes, watching him get the medicine.

"Fine, but I'm not going to stay in bed all day."

"Fair enough." He handed her the pills and a glass of water. She quickly took the pills and downed the glass, going back to playing with the girls. He smiled, appreciating that she didn't resist taking the medicine. "You'll have to take them again before bed." He took his place back on the bed, smiling at Amelia's babbling.

She nodded, not really listening to what he was saying. "Could you get some of the toys you made for them?" She looked very eager to show the girls.

"That's a brilliant idea!" He jumped up and went to the nursery. He picked up the mini TARDIS, the Dalek plushie, the Adipose doll, and a few other thing. He came back, arms full of the toys.

River beamed as she saw him reappear in the doorway, "Girls, look what daddy has for you." Freya waved her arms excitedly and Amelia clapped her hands with a happy squeal. River smiled at the girls excitement, "Daddy made these just for you two." She kissed both of them on the top of the head. He set the toys down at the end of the bed, cheeks in a wide grin. They immediately reach for the toys, Amelia going for the Adipose and Freya choosing a Ood. River took the Doctor's hand, pulling him down on the bed beside her before leaning in for a long, loving kiss. His hand caressed the sides of her face as they kissed, loving the feel of her soft silky skin.

"You are a wonderful thing, River."

She beamed, pressing her forehead to his, "I could say the same to you, sweetie." He stroked along her cheek, allowing his eyes to wonder over face. Her blissful, loving look was disturbed by a loud wail from Amelia. He glanced down at Amelia to see her face scrunched up and tears running down her face.

He scooped her up. "Sh, sh... it's okay."

"What's wrong, my love?" River murmured, looking a bit worried, though there was probably nothing to worry about at all. She wasn't used to things crying for no reason. She just snuggled into the Doctor's chest, not saying anything, but being semi comforted by his touch.

As soon as Amelia started to calm down, Freya burst into tears. "Don't cry, darling, it's alright." River whispered, scooping her up. He patted her back, enjoying the sight of River holding their child.

"Twins is going to be tricky isn't it? Soon they'll be plotting against us."

She smiled weakly, still a bit worried about the twins, "I certainly hope not."

"At least they don't out number us." He joked, sniffing the air. "Oh. I think I know why they were crying."

"Why?" She asked, kissing Freya's forehead as she continued to sniffle in her arms.

"They need a diaper change." He lifted Amelia up a to make a confirmation sniff, he recoiled a little at the smell.

"Oh...umm...alright." She pushed herself off the bed, immediately having to sit down again after feeling lightheaded after getting on her feet. He came over to her side of the bed.

"Why don't I do it this time?" He moved to lift Freya from her arms.

She shook her head, holding Freya a bit tighter, "No, no we're both their parents, it isn't right of me to leave you with all the work."

"Yes, but you are also still recovering from giving birth and a fever." He insisted, not wanting her to push herself harder than necessary.

"I promise I'll be fine." She would feel terrible if he had to do everything, even if helping out meant pushing herself harder than she should be.

"Well..." he kissed her forehead. "Fine. But if your temperature goes up again, I want you resting."

She rolled her eyes, "Alright, fine." She carried Freya back to the nursery, changing her diaper. He followed, changing Amelia's while managing to keep a straight face. River smiled as she watched him, her love only growing as she watched him parent their children. She pressed a kiss to his cheek once he was finished. "Did I really do that well of a job? I think it might be crooked." He looked at the diaper, deciding whether it was crooked or not.

"It's perfect, don't worry about it." She smiled, her cheeks a bit flushed with heat. "Very well."

He smiled. "You're turning all red."

"I am not." She denied, though her cheeks felt like they were on fire. Come to think of it, her whole body felt like it was on fire.

He frowned, "Are you okay?" He moved to put a hand on her forehead.

She quickly pushed his hand away, not wanting him to feel how hot she was, "Yes, I've already told you that I'm fine."

"I'm just concerned about you, River. Absolutely sure?"

"I don't want you worrying about me." She said, avoiding the question.

"It's my job to worry." He insisted. "And that wasn't an answer."

"I just need to sit down for a few minutes and I'll be good as new. Really, I don't want to be a burden on you."

"You aren't a burden." He told her as she sat in the rocking chair.

"Well I feel like one..." She grumbled, still cradling Freya.

He kissed her forehead. "I can assure you that you're not. You're my wife and it's our job to take care of each other."

She smiled weakly, "Thank you."

"It's my pleasure. Would you like anything?" He wanted her to be comfortable.

"A blanket and pillow would be nice." She murmured, leaning back in her chair.

"I thought as much. Back in a moment." He said, leaving the room.

"Take your time." She yawned. He took her advice and strolled down the halls to the linen closet. He hummed the tune to he was humming earlier, dancing back into the room. She giggled as he danced into the room, finding him to be very amusing.

"Your requested items, madame" He said in what fancy voice he could muster and made effort to bow forwards.

She laughed again, taking the things from him. "Thank you, kind sir."

He smiled his childish smile and continued dancing to his little song. Holding Amelia in his arms as a dance partner. River smiled tiredly as she watched them. Freya let out a squeak of jealousy, wanting a turn to dance as well. He glanced over at them when Freya made and angry tone.

"What's she saying?"

"I think Miss Freya wants a turn, don't you sweetie?" She bounced Freya in her lap. Freya waved her arms above her head.

_Up! _

The Doctor chuckled and switched so River was holding Amelia and he was holding Freya. She smiled, cuddling Amelia close to her. Her forehead was burning hot and her face had become clammy.

He slowed is waltz. He could see that her fever had clearly gone up, but if he pointed if out she'd probably deny it. He tried to put it casually "You know, you could go lie down for a while. Take a little rest."

Of course, she shook her head, "I'm sitting, I'm fine."

He sighed. "River, you're pale and clammy. I don't need to feel your forehead to know that."

She huffed angrily, but agreed, "Fine, but I'm telling you right now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with me."

"I'm just taking procautions." He told her and helped her out of the chair. She shook him off of her, not wanting his help.

"I really do hate you sometimes."

"No you don't. And you'll thank me when I make your fever go away." She rolled her eyes, a scowl on her face as she gave Amelia to him. He took her in in right arms while Freya was in his left, and followed her to their bedroom to make sure she actually did lie down and wasn't tricking him.

She glared at him once back in their room "Did you really feel the need to follow me?" She crossed her arms.

"I.. er... sorry" He apologized. "I was just... making sure you were comfortable."

She narrowed her eyes, "Really? Were you now?"

"Yes..." He looked down at the floor. "I just.. go then." He shifted his weight on his feet before turning around.

Being ill had soured her mood and she slammed the door behind him, locking it so he wouldn't be able to get in. He jumped a little at the noise and looked behind him at the closed door. He sighed, but knew making her rest was for the better. She paced around the room for a good half hour, refusing to give into sleep. Finally, she decided to sleep, curling up in bed.

The Doctor knocked on the door, but she must've been asleep or too upset to answer him, so he left her medicine and a sandwich outside the door. He went back to the nursery in time for Amelia to start wailing. He picked her up, but she wouldn't calm down.

River woke at the sound of Amelia's wailing. She waited a moment, thinking the Doctor would calm her, but once several minutes had passed and the crying continued, she pushed herself out of bed. Nearly tripping over the things he had left outside the door, she rushing to the nursery.

"Sh, shh. It's okay." The Doctor soothed but Amelia still didn't stop. He turned, seeing River had come in. "She won't stop." He explained, still patting her back.

"Alright, give her here." She held out her arms to take Amelia from him, forgetting that she was mad at him. Amelia clung to her blouse, letting her sobs slow down. "It's okay, sweetheart." River murmured, stroking her back, rocking gently, "It's alright, I've got you."

_You weren't there. Daddy was, but you weren't. I didn't want daddy, I wanted you._

"I'm here now, sweetie. Don't worry, I'm right here." She kissed her forehead, a part of her very happy to hear that Amelia had wanted _her_ instead of the Doctor. He seemed a bit stunned that River's efforts of calming their daughter had been more effective than his. He opened his mouth to say something, but closed it as Freya woke up whining.

River didn't noticed his stunned expression, her attention fully on Amelia. She was still busy calming her when Freya awoke. He scooped her up, again trying his best to get her to be calm.

She finally looked over at him, watching as he did his best to comfort their daughter. It worked slightly better this time, but only because her was holding Freya so she could see her mother. She moved closer to him, holding out her finger for Freya to hold onto, "Don't cry, my love." She soothed, kissing the back of her hand.

"How can you do that? I can try my hardest to make them happy, and they're happy just by looking at you."

"Sometimes they just want to see their mummy." She smiled at the two babies. "Don't trouble yourself over it. I'm sure there will be times when they're happy by just looking at you too."

"I doubt that. You are more lovely to look at than I am."

She laughed weakly, "Oh stop it, that's not true. Daddy is very handsome, isn't he girls?" Freya tried to look up at him, while Amelia giggled.

_His chin is funny. _

_"_Well I think he's very handsome, and I certainly wouldn't mind looking at him all day." She kissed his cheek, "And mummy isn't as lovely as him, now is she." She added in an effort to make him feel better.

"You _are_ lovely." He insisted. "Just look at these two. I bet they got all of their looks from you."

"Now that's not true, they got their looks from both of us." She smiled, bouncing Freya, "Do you think mummy's lovely?"

_Absolutely! _She nodded her head. _Mummy is the bestest and most loveliest. _

She beamed, kissing her forehead and cuddling her a bit closer, "Now aren't you just the sweetest."

The Doctor beamed at them. "You both are adorable."

River smiled over at him, "So are you two." He glanced down at Amelia who is reaching up to him and smiling.

"Daddy's face isn't so bad after all then, eh?"

River smiled, "I told you that you were handsome."

"Yes but I wanted her to think it, too." He and Amelia simultaneously giggled as he bounced her.

She laughed, seeing the two of them giggle. "She does..."

"Wonderful!" He exclaimed. "Are you feeling better, River?"

She nodded, "Yes, I feel absolutely fine now." Of course her fever was still present, and she still looked absolutely awful, but she was in fact feeling a bit better after her nap.

"Did you take the medicine I left you?" He asked. He knew she must've at least seen that it was there having left the room.

She shook her head, "No, I was in a bit of a rush to get in here I didn't really stop to take the medicine." She looked back down at Freya, "She was crying so much I thought something was wrong."

"Well, she's just fine." He smiled a little. "You should take your medicine, though."

"Really, sweetie, I don't need medicine."

"It's either that or I make you go on bed rest again." He stood his ground. "Please?"

"Now that I'm not pregnant you can't _make_ me do anything." Her tone was a bit sharp.

"I..." He didn't exactly know how to respond to that. He didn't make her do anything when she was pregnant, or at least he didn't think he did. But she was right that he couldn't force her to do it. "Sorry. I just want you to be healthy."

She frowned slightly, "I can get well on my own. It's better if I just fight this off anyway, it will help build my immune system." She wasn't exactly sure this was true, but she didn't want him worrying about her.

"Alright." He kissed her forehead. "But please listen to your body and rest when you need to."

"Of course, my love." She whispered.

"Good." He put his forehead against hers before pulling away. "Right. Lunch then? I made you a sandwich..." He rambled a bit as he usually did after they got into a disagreement.

"Yes, I saw. That was very sweet of you." She smiled, moving a bit closer to him.

"I could make you another one." He scratched the back of his head. "I mean, it's been sitting there for a while, you might not want it." She shook her head, kissing his cheek, then pressing her forehead to his in an effort to show that she wasn't angry with him.

"It's alright, I'm not that hungry anyway. I may just have some fruit or something..." He enjoyed her soft and gentle tone, getting her message of not being mad anymore. And he couldn't help himself from bringing her into a passionate kiss. She hummed in appreciation, kissing him back deeply.

"Maybe we should put the girls down for a little nap." She purred, grinning at him.

"I certainly don't mind, but they might." He pointed out. "They just woke up."

She frowned slightly, "You're right...And besides, I'll need to feed them soon anyway..."

"After lunch, then?" He asked, still hoping the offer was open.

"Hmmm, maybe, if you're a good boy." She smirked, her hips swaying as she walked out of the room to the kitchen. He grinned to himself, watching the swing of her hips before realizing that he was just standing there. He quickly followed her to the kitchen. "Do you want anything?" She asked, looking through the cabinets for something to eat.

"Some jammie dodgers if we have any. I do love jammie dodgers." He said childishly. She rolled her eyes, finding the jammie dodgers and handing them to him, taking nothing for herself.

"You know, you should probably have something more substantial than that." She looked down at Freya in her arms, "What about you? Are you hungry, my love?"

Freya nodded and the Doctor asked through a mouth full of cookie. "Like what?"

"I don't know, like a sandwich or something. Cookies aren't the best lunch you know..." She unbuttoned her shirt so she could nurse the baby. His face went red ever so slightly when she undid her shirt. He wasn't exactly awkward or embarrassed, but River nursing was still something he had to get used to.

"Right. Sandwich. I'll.. er.. make that." She noticed the slight change in color in his face,

"Are you blushing?" She raised an eyebrow.

"No. I'm not." He said, turning to face the counter and make the sandwich. She watched his back as Freya nursed, readjusting her clothes once she was finished. He came back over to his chair, plate in one hand and Amelia in the other.

"Would you like some? It's roast beef." He asked, trying to ignore his previous awkwardness. She shook her head, afraid she might throw up if she ate anything. Amelia started to whine hungrily. He handed Amelia to River and took Freya to burp her, blushing a bit as River unbuttoned her shirt again.

"If you want, I could go somewhere else..." She stopped unbuttoning to look at him.

"No, It's okay. It's just going to take some getting used to that I'm not the one you're taking off your shirt for." His ears went pink realizing he said that last bit out loud.

She giggled, "Jealous are we?"

"No." He said defensively. "Well... maybe a little..." It sounded childish to admit it, but he did any way.

She laughed again, " There's no need to be jealous."

"I know. I really shouldn't be, it's just something I have to get used to." He reached for his sandwich. Once Amelia had finished, River buttoned up once again, rubbing her back gently. She was exhausted, leaning back in her chair, her eyelids heavy.

"Maybe the twins aren't the only one's who'll need a nap after lunch." He joked.

She smiled tiredly, "Mmm, but I need my special Doctor time."

He laughed softly. "'Special Doctor time' doesn't have to be sexy time. It can just be cuddling and still be special."

She hummed in agreement, "And you know, you're quite a good cuddler."

"If I do say so myself." He added. "Come on. Let's put these two down for their nap." She nodded, pushing herself out of the chair, carrying Amelia back to the nursery. Freya and Amelia didn't make a fuss going to sleep, and after a lullaby, were dreaming peacefully. River smiled as she looked on at her babies adoringly. She leaned against her husband, sighing contently.

He brought his arms down, wrapping them around her waist. "We made two whole other people." He whispered. "I don't know about you, but I call that" He kissed her cheek. "Brilliant and amazing." He kissed the other.

She beamed, leaning against him a bit more, "I still can't believe it..." She breathed, "I never thought I'd have children, and especially not twins."

"Really? Never? I always pictured kids in my life." He said, leaning his head against hers.

She shrugged, "We never talked about it, so I wasn't sure if you wanted them. I didn't even know if _I_ really wanted to have them..."

"I probably would've changed you mind sooner or later." He said smugly.

She raised an eyebrow, smiling, "Oh really? And how exactly would you have done that?"

"Er.. well.." He pondered this. "I'm sure I would've found a way."

She smiled, hugging him tightly, "Come on, I want my special Doctor time now." She whispered, tugging him towards the door. He followed her to the bedroom quietly closing the door behind them.

She smiled as she pulled him along behind her, jumping onto the bed. He fell to the bed with her, landing neatly on top of her. He smiled, using the opportunity to kiss her. She giggled, kissing him back, "You're ridiculous."

"Ridiculous?" He bopped her on the nose. "How is being madly in love with you," He kissed the same spot, "ridiculous?"

Her nose scrunched in amusement as he kissed it, "Madly in love with me?"

"Yes. Madly in love with you." He said rather proudly. "It's ridiculous the amount I love you. That's what makes me ridiculous, I suppose."

"Well you know what?" She murmured, pressing her forehead to his, "I'm madly in love with you too..." She nuzzled her nose against his.

"Good." He chuckled. "Because it was that or you've been misleading be for the past few centuries." He joked.

She giggled again, pulling him to her for another kiss. "I'm sorry to tell you this, but I'm afraid you're stuck with me forever."

"No complaints over here." He ignored the thought in his head about the Library, glad she was here now.

"Good." She purred, smiling up at him. "There better not be." He returned the smile, rolling over on side so he was still facing her.

"You still want your cuddle?"

"Of course." She whispered, her eyes sparkling. He wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to him. Her body fit perfectly with his. She beamed as she cuddled into him, her head resting in the crook of his neck. He whispered in Gallifreyan in her ear as sleep started to take them both. She finally fell asleep curled into him, the last bits of her fever breaking as she slept.


	16. Magic Words

**CH 16**

If you have not seen the mini-episodes "First Night" and "Last Night" YOU NEED TO WATCH THEM NOW! They are only about 4 minutes each but very crucial to the plot. This chapter and the next will involve them so you need to see them. (You can find them on YouTube or click the links)  
First night- watch?v=3-6TF2Uyzm4  
Last night- watch?v=BPVZEQQUnu8

The Doctor loved being a parent more than he ever imagined he would. He especially loved seeing the twins' 'firsts'. Their first non telepathic words, their first steps. Even the first that were more frightening, like their first cold or when they learned to crawl and were almost impossible to find. Months turned into years. The Doctor was starting to feel like it would be like this for ever. Him and his family in the TARDIS, adventuring through the universe and dodging those who wanted them dead. At least until River decided it was time to resume work at the university. It was at least half a year before she started going on expeditions again.

"Doctor!" River called, wandering around the halls of the TARDIS searching for him. She had been feeling rather ill for the past week, and of course he had tried to make her stay in bed, an offer that she refused. She called for him again, peering in the girls' room. They were playing with each other, not noticing their mother in the doorway. It was some sort of pretend game they made up.

"Okay, I'll be the pirate and you be the captain." Said Freya, getting up to look for an eye patch and an a captains hat in the chest on dress-up clothes they had. River smiled, leaning against the door frame, momentarily forgetting her search for the Doctor as she watched them play. She couldn't believe how fast the girls had grown. It seemed like just yesterday they were little newborns. "Argh, ye matey!" Said Freya when she had found the proper pirate attire.

Amelia giggled and noticed River. "Mummy, do you want to play with us?" They had acquired British accents from learning their parent's speech patterns.

"I would love to, but I'm trying to find your father, do you know where he is?" She asked, kneeling down so she was eye level with them. Amelia wrapped her tiny hands around her neck, giving her a hug as she usually did.

"No. He was here a while ago and said something about a termacup. Thermocuppa? Thermocupple?" She had trouble pronouncing the word 'thermocuplinks'. River hugged Amelia tightly, kissing the side of her head and smiling as she tried to figure out the correct pronunciation of the word.

"Alright, I'll find him. You two keep playing, alright?" Amelia nodded, re-donning her captains hat. They laughed and giggled as she left the room.

The familiar sound of zaps, annoyed grumbling, and small 'Ow's coming from down the hall caught River's attention. She walked briskly down the hall and into the console room. She quietly went down the stairs, to where she knew that Doctor was working on the TARDIS. Since his back was to her, she crept up behind him, wrapping her arms around his neck, she pressing a kiss into his hair, purring, "Hello, sweetie."

He jumped a little, dropping the wire he was holding. "River, you scared me!" Though he wasn't really complaining as she purred into his hair.

She laughed, giving him another kiss, "I'm sorry, my love. I thought you'd be happy to see me." She teased, bending over and picking up the wire he had dropped, holding it behind her back so he couldn't get to it.

He slid his goggles on to his forehead. "I am happy to see you. Extremely happy, in fact." He stood up and kissed her, snaking his hands behind her back and reaching for the wire.

She quickly pulled away, taking a few steps away from him, "Sneaky!" She cried, unable to hold back a laugh. "If you want it back, you'll have to tell me the magic words."

He grinned playing along. "Expelliarmus?" He was always a big fan of Harry Potter.

She laughed again, "I don't think so, my love. Try again. Word_s_, plural." He pretended to think. "May I please have the wire back?" She shook her head, "Wrong again." She knew it was a bit mean to tease him, but she couldn't resist.

"Accio wire?" He tried another known spell, growing a little impatient.

"I believe that the correct words were 'I love you, River.'" She handed the wire back to him. He blushed a little, cursing himself for not thinking of that. He set the wire down and leaned in close to her ear.

"And I do. I love more than I thought I could ever love someone. And I won't stop loving you until the day I die."

She smiled, rewrapping her arms around his neck and hugging him again, "I have some exciting news." She whispered, remembering the reason why she had been looking for him in the first place.

"It's not another archeological exposition is it?" There had been a few expeditions she's been on since she resumed her role at the university. Each time she told him she was going on one, he was afraid she'd say it was the Library.

She frowned slightly, smacking his arm. "It is, but if you're not ever going to _pretend _to be excited for me then I won't tell you."

He put on his best smile for her. "I am excited. See? Theses expositions make you happy, so they make me happy too."

She smiled back at him, "Good, and I think you're going to like this one. I have been invited to lead my team on an expedition of the Library planet!" She watched his face, waiting for what she was sure would be an excited reaction from him. An expedition to a planet full of books and learning, how could he not love the idea…

He tried to smile. Or at last act happy for her, but he must've not because River's smiled faltered. He tried a little harder, forcing a big smile. "River that's wonderful." He pulled her into a hug, mostly so she wouldn't see his expression change to sadness. Why was the universe so cruel? Why couldn't things just stay the way they were, all four of them simply living how one does with their family? He wanted to at least stay positive for River, but right now he wanted to kick and yell and cry. He wanted to scream that the universe and ask why it wouldn't leave him alone. But for now, he hugged on to River, wishing she could stay in his arms forever.

She was a bit alarmed by his reaction, wondering why he was acting so strangely. "Doctor?" She asked softly, holding him tightly, "Is there something wrong?" Whenever she announced that she was going somewhere, he would act a bit odd up until she told him where she was going. She knew he worried about her, but what could go wrong on an archeology expedition? It wasn't like she was going to die or anything…

"I... No. Nothing's wrong." It took his whole will power to keep his mask of happiness on. "Tell you what. You might be there a few days, why don't I take you and the girls out tonight? I always promised you we'd go to the Singing Towers of Darillium." He recalled her telling him that's where they went that last time she saw him.

Her whole expression lit up, "Really? I've been wanting to go there for ages!" She paused, something still felt off, "Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes." He insisted. "I'm absolutely fine."

She stared at him for a moment, knowing she wouldn't get anything out of him. "Let's go tell the girls then." She knew they hated it when she left, but hopefully the idea of a trip would make it better. He nodded, putting an arm around her waist walking back to the girls room.

Freya burst into the hallway holding a plastic sword, Amelia close behind, "Avast ye stowaways!" They said together.

River let out a pretend gasp, "Oh, no! Sweetie, it looks like the nasty pirates caught us!" The Doctor chuckled slightly.

"Stowaways must be cast overboard!" Declared Captain Amelia. She pulled out a rope and proceeded to tie River and the Doctor together.

"What happened to our sweet little girls? I hope the pirates haven't hurt them." River mused, trying to hold back her laughter as Amelia tied her to the Doctor. The twins exchanged glances and smirks.

Freya pointed her sword at them and in her best pirate voice said "We've got your 'sweet little girls' all tied up, just like you. And they'll stay that way unless you hand over all your gold."

"Well we don't have any gold, and that's too bad because I had an extra special surprise to tell them about, but if they're all tied up...I guess they'll never know."

Freya and Amelia's eyes went wide with excitement. They huddled their shoulders together, discussing something the adults couldn't hear before turning back to them. "We'll let you and your precious children go _if _you give us cookies." They seemed to think this was a fair trade.

River smiled, then looked over at her husband, "What do you think? Should we give them the cookies?"

"I'd say it was a good deal if I ever saw one." He told her.

"Alright, one cookie each." She instructed, "And don't try and sneak any more or it will be no cookies for the rest of the week." They nodded in understatement and began to untie them.

"Mummy, what's the surprise?" Asked Freya, dropping her pirate voice.

She paused, wanting to get the bad part out of the way, "Well, girls I'm going to be going on another expedition, so I'll be away for a few days."

"Aww! But Mum!" Amelia complained. "Why can't you just stay here?"

She smiled weakly, kneeling down to their level again, "I wish I could, my love, but it's for work. I have to go."

"No fair!" Amelia pouted.

"Can't you just tell them you're not going? Pleaseee?" Freya piped in. The Doctor wished River would listen to them and not go, he wanted to be part of the begging her to stay.

She sighed, "I'm sorry, but I already promised I would go and it's not nice to back out of a promise, you know that." She held her arms out to them, "Besides, it's only for a few days, I'm not leaving forever." Of course, she didn't know that this was a lie.

"But a few days _is _forever." They complained. "And we'll miss you so much. Daddy get's really sad, too." She gave the Doctor a pleading look, the more they pleaded, the harder it was to say no.

He tried to give her an assuring smile. "Why don't you tell the about the surprise?"

She bit her lip, "Actually, I think you should tell them. I'll be right back." She stood up quickly, running down the hall to the bathroom. She shut and locked the door right before getting sick into the toilet.

He was a bit surprised at her sudden rush to the bathroom. Still glancing at the door where she had disappeared a moment ago, he bent down to inform his daughters of the special evening he had planned. Happy squeals erupted from the girls and they jumped up and down exuberantly.

River spent a rather long time in the bathroom, absolutely miserable as vomited at least three times. Though it was comforting to hear the excited squeals of the girls. At first the Doctor thought that maybe she was just taking a long time, but when he heard the retching from the bathroom, he went to check on her. "River?" He softly knocked.

"I'm fine." She answered quickly, her stomach finally settling. She went to clean herself up, finally opening the door.

"You didn't sound fine" He didn't recall her being sick at the Library.

Amelia and Freya peered out from behind the Doctor's legs. "Mummy, you are you sick? Does this mean we can't go to Dillimum?" Amelia again mispronounced the word.

"I'm not sick, I'm fine." She assured them all. "We can still go to Darillium, don't worry." They smiled, seeming to forget the noises they heard before., but the Doctor still raised an eyebrow.

"I heard you being sick into the toilet. Are you sure you're okay?"

"Yes, yes I'm fine." She smiled weakly, taking his hand and giving it a light squeeze, "I promise."

"But that's not an explanation as to why you where vomiting." He put a hand to her forehead which felt perfectly normal.

"I probably just at something that upset my stomach. Please, I'm fine." She insisted. He nodded, letting it go.

"Why don't you help the girls get changed changed? I'll meet you int the console room." He wanted her to spend as much time with the twins. He couldn't even think about how he was going to have to break it to them that their mummy wasn't going to come home.

She nodded, "Of course, come on you two." She took both of their hands, leading them back to their room.

"Can I wear my green dress?" Freya asked, tilting her head up to River.

"Of course my love. You can wear any dress you'd like." She smiled.

"Then I want to wear my yellow one." Said Amelia. "The one that swirls when I spin."

"Alright." She retrieved both dresses from the closet, helping them both dress.

The Doctor was waiting for them in the control room. He was wearing a top hat and a coat with tails.

She pressed a kiss to Amelia's forehead, then Freya's "Now you two go and meet your Daddy in the console room while I get dressed, alright?"

" 'Kay, mummy. Mia, do you wanna race?" Freya often called Amelia 'Mia' for short. Amelia nodded and in a flash they were sprinting down the hall. River smiled, picking up a few things in their room and putting them back in their rightful place. She certainly would miss them a lot, even if she was just leaving for a few days.

Soon, she was all changed and ready to go, meeting up with them in the console room. "Ready?"

He beamed at her. "You look absolutely stunning." He swirled his cane, swaggering over to her and giving her a kiss.

"And you look very handsome." She purred, kissing him back. "I can't wait to get my hands on you later."

His face reddened. "River... not in front of the kids." He glanced at the twins who had made grossed out faces at the sight of their parents kissing.

She laughed, amused by the children's disgusted expressions. Grabbing the lapels of his jacket, she pulled him flush against her, planting another sloppy kiss on his lips just to get a few more squeals out of their daughters. He flailed his arms a little because of Freya and Amelia's laughs and squeals, but decided he didn't care and rested his hands on her hips. She pulled back looking very pleased, "I'll be looking forward to more of that later."

"I'd better make it good, then." He said so the girls couldn't hear. If this was going to be his last night with his wife, he wasn't to make it count. He wanted to make it special.

"Mmm, you'd better. I need something to hold me over while I'm gone."

He hid the falter in his smile and turned his head to look at the girls dresses. "You two look like princesses." He said. "Ready everyone?"

River beamed at the little ones, then nodded, "We're all set."

"Geronimo, then!" He went back to the controls and started to flip levers and push buttons. River walked over to the console, turning on the stabilizers and turning off the brakes while she thought he wasn't paying attention.

"Oi! I like the noise!" He whined moving back over to turn the breaks back on.

"Yes I know, but the TARDIS doesn't like it when you leave the breaks on." She turned them back off, then stood in front of the lever so he couldn't get to it. He grumbled , but remembering it was the last time she was going to be here to scold his piloting he leaned forwards and kissed her. He didn't notice that the action accidentally pressed a button.

The TARDIS silently landed and he pulled away. She grinned, "So many kisses today, what's gotten into you?" She was only teasing, she loved his kisses and she certainly wasn't complaining.

"You're just so iresistable." He commented. The girls were too excited to wait for their parent to stop flirting with each other. They started to run a head and out the door to see the new world.

Out of the corner of her eye she noticed them run out the door. "Girls! Wait!" River called, running after them, the door shutting behind her.

He stood there for a moment, a little confused then ran after the three. Out side was not, in fact Darillium. He recoginized it almost imitately. It was where he took River on their first date as a married couple. In just a few minutes, the sky would have more stars in the sky than in any other point in history. That meant he had a few minutes until his younger self got here. "River! Wait!"


	17. One last dance before the song ends

**CH 17**

She was still running after the girls, trying to catch up with them as they split up. She hadn't heard him, still shouting for the girls to come back to her. He finally caught up with her, breathing very heavily. River was much better at running in fancy clothing than he was. "Er, you go after Freya and I'll find Amelia?"

She nodded, running off in the other direction, "Freya!" She shouted, just as another TARDIS landed behind her.

Freya giggled as she made her way to the top of the enormous tree. "Mummy mummy! Look!" She called River, staring up at the sky. River looked up, the stars that had started to appear lighting the sky.

"Yes, my love, it's beautiful. Now will you please come down from there? We're not going to get to go to Darillium if you don't." She was already starting to follow her to the top.

"But it's so pretty, mummy!" She was hypnotized by the dazzling sky. She leaned close to the railing, reaching her head up thinking she could put a star in her pocket. A smile spread across River's face as she reached the top. She swooped Freya up in her arms, holding her a bit higher in an effort to help her reach the stars.

"Do you want to know a secret?" She whispered.

"Yes." Freya's eyes sparkled from the reflection of the stars.

"Your daddy took me here once. A long, _long _time ago. It was one of my very first adventures with him." She kissed the top of Freya's head.

"How long ago?" She asked, wondering less about how many years ago for her it was and more about the date they were here.

"Oh, I don't remember exactly, it was the night of our wedding." She sighed, "Well, come on. We have to go back to the TARDIS so we can go to Darillium." They started to make their way back down.

"Mummy, will you tell me about your wedding?"

"Well...it's very complicated, sweetie." She wasn't sure exactly how to explain the mess of events to her little daughter. The twins were very smart for their age, probably to Time Lord part of them, but it was still a rather complicated thing to explain to a child.

"Will you tell me when you get back from your trip?" She asked. They reached the bottom of the tree where the Doctor and Freya were waiting.

"Yes of course." She promised, helping her down from the tree and brushing off her dress.

"Cross your hearts." She insisted.

"Cross my hearts." She repeated, making the motion over both places on her chest.

"Good." She smiled showing the empty space where a tooth had fallen out just a week ago.

The Doctor came to her side looking out of breath from chasing their daughter around. "Now that that's sorted out, let go." He gave River a look saying that they should get out of here before they showed up. She nodded, walking over to the TARDIS and opening the doors.

The Doctor's eyes widened and her ran in after her, leaving the girls out side. "No River, wrong TARDIS!" He came up be hind her. "We're parked around back. Younger version." He looked up at his younger self who seemed relieved that he didn't have to deal with a third River alone.

Her eyes grew wide with delight as she looked at the other version of him, "Two of you. Oh the mind races, does it not." She looked back at the doors for a moment, making sure the girls hadn't come in.

"Come on, River. We'll be late." He hoped she'd get the message that their children where waiting unsupervised.

"He's taking me to the Singing Towers of Darillium. He's been promising for ages." She said as she walked out, going to check on the girls and shoo them back into the proper TARDIS.

Both Doctors smiles' disappeared as they heard the TARDIS door shut. He didn't know if he could keep himself together when the younger one asked if this was the Darillium she referred to in the Library. He managed to keep composure, taking a moment to himself when he left to make sure he wasn't cry before going back to the right TARDIS.

"Doctor?" River asked softly, something in his expression had changed, "Is something wrong?" Every thing was wrong. He felt lost and hopeless and helpless. They light and joy of his life was slipping through his fingers and disappearing forever. He wanted to tell her and never let her go to the LIbrary, but he smiled.

"Nothing's wrong, dear." River stared at him for a moment, knowing that there was something and wishing he would tell her.

After a moment, she sighed, "Alright...Are you ready to go then?"

"Yeah. Um, I think you'd better fly her this time. We don't want to end up running into ourselves again."

"Okay..." She murmured, walking to the console and setting the coordinates, turning the breaks back on hoping that the noise would make it at least a little happier. He sat on the pilot's chair, looking up at her at the familiar noise.

"I thought you hated the breaks on."

She smiled over at him, "It makes you happy, so therefore it makes me happy."

"All I need to be happy is you and our children." He replied, coming up behind her and giving her a peck on the cheek.

She breamed, "Well I'm happy to hear that." She turned to the twins, "Are you girls ready to see Darillium?"

"Yes!" They told her. They had started jumping around the console singing a little rhyme: 'Dillium, Dillium, we're gonna see Dillium!' Neither could quite properly say Darillium.

She knelt down and pulled them into her arms, "Now, what are mummy and daddy's rules for adventures?"

"Stay close to you." Said Amelia.

"Run." Freya added. There tended to be a lot of running when they were on adventures.

"Anything else?" She asked, looking at the two of them.

Amelia thought a moment before saying "No fighting."

"And no playing hide and go seek without telling you first." Said Freya remembering once when they forgot to tell them their parents that they where hiding and they spent the entire afternoon looking for them.

She nodded, "Yes, yes I like those ones, but there's one you're forgetting one very important rule."

Freya and Amelia looked at each other, but neither could think of any more. "What is it, mummy?"

"No talking to anyone you don't know unless one of us says it's alright. Understand?"

They nodded simultaneously. "Can we go to Dillium now?"

"Alright, give your mummy kisses first." She smiled, knowing how excited they were. They kissed her cheeks at the same time and then it was a blur of tiny feet out the front doors, but they knew to stay close to the TARDIS this time. River stood, walking over to the Doctor and taking his hand. She rest her head against his shoulder as they walked out the doors.

The melodious sound of the singing towers greeted them before they could take in the sight of the tall silver coulombs on top of beautiful mountain peaks. The valley they had landed in gave the a full view of the mountains. Since the atmosphere was altered, the sound waves from the towers gave off brilliant magentas, indigos, and lavenders. River let out an amazed gasp, looking out at the beautiful scene displayed before them. "Oh my...Doctor, it's beautiful." She whispered, gripping his arm a bit tighter. "Really, _really beautiful_."

He looked over at her taking note of how the purple light illuminated her face. He wanted to remember this moment. Her expression was so much happier than it would be tomorrow when she looked into his eyes and he wouldn't know who she was. Thinking about the inevitable made his eyes threaten to spill over, but he held back the tears as best he could.

She glanced up at him, noticing the tears in his eyes. "Doctor..." She whispered, her expression suddenly filled with concern. She cupped his face in her hands, stroking his cheeks with her thumbs.

He reached up to put his hand over hers. "I-I'm sorry. I don't know what's come over me." He lied, no longer able to keep his tears at bay. He let them fall, running over River's thumbs.

She pulled him in closer to her so his forehead was pressed to hers. "It's alright, my love." She murmured, brushing away the tears with her thumbs, pressing soft kisses to his cheeks. He pulled his lips to hers and kissed her for a long while before pulling away. He never though he'd be the one kissing and crying. Amy and Rory yes, but him not so much.

"You know that I love you. More in each heart than I could ever hold in two."

"Yes, of course I know that." She smiled up at him, "And I love you, more than anything in the universe."

Every cell of his body wished this wasn't his last evening with her. He returned the smile reaching his hand in his pocket. He fingered the sonic screwdriver, wondering if he should give it to her now or later.

"Actually, all of this reminds me, I have something to tell you..." She looked up at him, thinking that now was as good a time as any to tell him her news. Plus the girls were still busy looking around, she didn't have to worry about them hearing. He pulled his hand away from the sonic, giving her his full attention.

"What is it?" His voice was still just a little shaky from crying.

She hesitated, "Maybe I'll tell you later..." She didn't want to risk upsetting even more.

"No.. it's okay. You should tell me now." Because there won't really be a later, though he said that last part in his head.

"Are you sure?" She asked, taking his hands in hers. "Because it's alright, I can tell you later if you want..."

"River, I'm good. Really, I promise I won't cry again." He was getting a little anxious. Surely there was nothing she could say so make him more sad than he was now.

"Well...um..." She smiled up at him, "The past week I've been feeling a bit odd, and...well...I've figured out the cause." She was both nervous and excited at the same time. "I'm pregnant."

His face grew into a childish smile, seeming to forget that he would not see her her grow or give birth. He would not see this child grow up and play with it's sisters. But he didn't think about that, he thought about the fact that he was going to have another child. "P-pregnant?"

She beamed and nodded, her eyes sparkling. "Surprise." She whispered.

"Another one?" He looked at her flat stomach. Though the grief of River's death was still present, he pushed them down and let the feelings and excitement of new fatherhood show.

She laughed, "Yes another one! What else would it be?" She looked up at him, searching his eyes for any sign of unhappiness, "Are you happy?" She asked.

"I couldn't be happier. We're having another baby River!" He picked her up and spun her around, wearing a big smile. She let out a laughing yelp as he lifted her, drawing the attention of the girls.

"Careful!" She giggled as he spun her, giving him another kiss.

"Sorry" He apologized, but still kept his smile. How could he let his wife slip from his life so easily? How could he just let her go to her death? And it wasn't just her life that was going to end now. He knew then and there that he had to do something. He couldn't stop her from going, but he was determined to find a way to save her and their child.

"It's alright." She beamed, "I want to keep this just between us, at least until after I get back, then we can figure out how and when to tell the girls." She whispered just as the twins came bouncing over to them, wanting to know what was going on.

"Mummy, daddy? Why are you smiling so much?" Asked Amelia wondering if it would make her smile too.

"We're just very happy to be here." She smiled, "Isn't it beautiful!"

"Purple is my favorite color now." She decided. "Can we come back here for my birthday?"

"Purple? I thought green was your favorite color." Amelia changed her favorite color constantly. "I think that's a question you'll have to ask your daddy."

"Well now it's purple." She turned to the Doctor. "Can we daddy? Pleeease?"

The Doctor nodded his head. "If that's what you and your sister agree on."

River smiled up at him, leaning over to whisper in his ear, "You're a wonderful father."

"And you are an amazing mother, River." He whispered back, kissing the edge on her ear. She looked up at him, her eyes filling with tears. Somewhere, in the back of her mind, she knew that after this trip, things would never be the same. She didn't know why or how, but she could feel it.

It was his turn to comfort her. He cupped her face like she did before wit him. "Hey, it's okay. What's wrong, River?"

"Nothing...Nothing it's just baby hormones." She whispered, quickly finding a passable excuse. He smirked. It had been quite a while, but he remembered how hormonal she was with the twins.

"Do you know how far along you are?" He asked, wiping away her tears.

She shook her head, "I-I don't know. I only did the test a few hours ago..." Tears continued to slip down her cheeks as she unsuccessfully tired to stop them. He concluded that that must have been why she was so long in the bathroom earlier.

"Mummy?" Amelia tugged as the bottom of her dress. "Why are you crying?"

River scooped her up, holding her tightly as she tried to think of what to tell her. "I'm thinking about how much I'm going to miss you when I leave." She answered.

"You'll only be gone a few days." She repeated the words River had told her earlier hoping it would make her feel better. She looked up at the towers. "And you're here now."

River nodded, kissing her forehead. "I know, my love, but that doesn't mean I'm not going to miss you a lot."

Amelia kissed River's cheek and nuzzled her head into her shoulder. "I'll miss you to. Promise to come right back?"

She smiled weakly, rubbing her back, "I promise. And I always do, don't I?"

"Always." She yawned and slipped her thumb into her mouth.

The Doctor picked up a sleepy Freya. "I think it might be time to get these two to bed."

She nodded, carrying Amelia back into the TARDIS and into the nursery. "Come on, sweetie. Let's get you changed." Amelia made a tired noise that was somewhere between a 'yes' and a murmur. The Doctor followed behind them. River gently changed Amelia out of her nice dress and into her pajamas, handing Freyas pajamas to the Doctor. He mimicked River's actions and soon the girls were both tucked in and sleeping soundly.

River lead him out of the room, backing up against the hallway wall and pulling him to her, "Now I do believe you promised me something earlier." She purred.

"I believe I did." He echoed.


	18. The Darkness Before the Dawn

**CH 18**

His lips were drawn to hers in an instant and his hands explored along her curves. She melted against him, lightly nipping at his lower lip as she kissed him back, her arms wrapping around his neck and in his hair. "We should do this every time you go on expeditions." He half whispered, kissing down her neck.

She rolled her head back, exposing her neck, "Mmm, I like that idea." She murmured, He bit lightly with his teeth, enough to leave a mark but not enough to hurt. "Doctor..." She whispered, pushing off his jacket, kicking of her heels. He left the disregarded coat and shoes in the hall as he started directing them to their bedroom, still keeping his arms around her. She clung to him, trying not fall over herself but rather successfully.

Halfway back to their bedroom, she fell backwards, pulling him down on top of her. He braced his self so he didn't hurt her or the precious cargo she carried. Though she didn't seem to be affected much by the fall, he still asked. "You okay?" Her hand immediately moved to her belly, not answering him for a moment.

"I think so...Are you?"

"Just fine." He answered, eying the hand on her belly. "Baby okay?"

"I don't know..." She looked up at him, "I landed on my back, so the baby should be fine.."

"Would you like me to check?" He wanted to be thorough and he knew it would probably bother him all night if he didn't.

She nodded, "Yes, please." He helped her of the floor and they went to the medbay, trying to be quiet so they wouldn't wake the girls. He helped her off the floor and they went to the medbay, trying to be quiet so they wouldn't wake the girls. She held onto his arm tightly, a little too tightly.

"River, I'm sure they're fine. There's no reason to be so nervous." He told her as they walked in.

She smiled weakly, "I know, it's just with all the complications I had with the girls...I can't help it..." He placed a kiss to the side of her head before detaching himself from her hold on him.

"Well there are more risks with having multiples, but I can safely say it's not likely for us to have twins again." He tried assuring her as he brought over the ultrasound.

She nodded, sitting down on the cot. "Well, it wasn't likely for us to have twins the first time either." He chuckled, squirting the blue gel on her stomach.

"I wouldn't call it unlikely. We both have time lord DNA so it was technically and 50-50% chance." He rambled. "Though I suppose you're right since there's hardly any books on time lord pregnancies, we wouldn't know the possibility of conceiving twins."

She shivered a bit as he spread the gel on her stomach, "I can't believe I'm going to be huge again..." She murmured.

"Neither can I." He lied. He didn't know if she was going to be able carry out this pregnancy. He wanted to find a way save her. He _would_ find a way to save her, but would he be able to save this child, too?

It had been a while since he'd used the ultrasound on her. Although he had done it so many times with the twins, it still felt new and exciting. "Is the baby alright?" She asked quietly, glancing over at the screen even though it was tilted away from her.

"They're perfect." He beamed. He clicked a few buttons to freeze the image before showing her the screen. "See?"

"Oh Doctor..." She breathed, staring at the screen, her hormones threatening to get her to start crying again. He sat next to her and wrapped an arm around her waist.

"It looks like you're about 3 or 4 weeks along. It's to early to tell what sex." He pondered a moment. "Do you think we should make it a surprise this time or not?"

She curled into him, resting her head against his shoulder, "Whatever you want." She whispered, nuzzling her nose against his neck.

"Maybe we should let the girls decide." He suggested.

She nodded, "But I don't want them to know until after I get back, alright?"

He nodded too. "And why's that?" He could help but be curious about these things.

Her gaze drifted away from his, "Well...It's still very early on in the pregnancy and that means the chance of having a..." She trailed off, squeezing her eyes shut.

He didn't say anything, just held on to her hand tightly. "It'll be okay, River. That won't happen."

"But it has happened, before we had the girls." She squeezed his hand, "What if I just got lucky the last time."

"Then we got lucky. Very lucky." He sighed, not wanting her to be sad. "We have two beautiful children. So maybe we don't have another and maybe we do. But either way, we are still the luckiest parents to have Amelia and Freya." She wrapped her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly so he wouldn't see the silent tears that rolled town her cheeks.

"You're right." She murmured, pulling herself together, "Thank you. I wouldn't have them without you."

"I could say the same to you." He was always amazed at how brave River was and how brave she'd have to be tomorrow. "Plus, you should take more credit than me since you have to do the hard part." He tried to lighten the mood.

"Well you saved my life if I recall correctly." She smiled, pulling back to press a kiss to his cheek.

He grinned, glad for the appreciation. "It's part of the job."

She nodded, "Just as I would give up anything and everything if it meant saving you or the girls." She didn't realize the irony of her words. He did, though he tried not to show it. He was about to suggest that they resume their evening, when they heard

"Mummy?" From the doorway. Freya was standing there with her stuffed adipose.

River turned, looking a bit surprised as her eyes fell on Freya, "What is it, love?" She asked, walking over to her.

"Had a bad dream." Freya rubbed her eye sleepily.

River picked her up, "Do you want to tell me about it?" She asked, running her fingers through Freya's little curls.

"The dark got you." She said. "It took you away. You said you'd come back, but you didn't." She seemed to be on the verge of tears.

"Shhh, it's alright." She soothed, rocking gently and letting her rest her head beneath her chin, "I will _always _come back to you, darling. Nothing could keep me away from you." She kissed the top of her head lightly, still stroking her curls.

"But mummy, the shadows..." She whimpered, still not convinced that the shadows were safe.

"Don't worry about the shadows, my love. There is nothing scary about the shadows." She didn't know how wrong she was.

Freya looked back at the dark hall way. "Do you promise?"

River nodded, "Yes, I promise."

Freya turned her head back to her mother's chest and snuggled close. "Tuck me in?"

"Of course, Freya." She murmured, glancing back at the Doctor before carrying Freya back to the nursery.

He did move to follow them. He couldn't if he tried. How could Freya have dreamed about it if she didn't know? Was her dream real? Would River never come back even if he tried to save her? His panic rose inside of him so quickly that he practically jumped up and ran into his and RIver's room just to make sure tomorrow hadn't come early.

River gently placed Freya back in bed, tucking her into the covers and kissing her forehead. "I'll see you in the morning before I leave, alright?" She whispered, careful not to wake Amelia.

Freya nodded sleepily holding onto River's finger with her tiny hand. "Alright, mummy."

She smiled softly, "I love you."

"Love you , too." She lulled as sleep began to take her again. River stayed until she was sure Freya was asleep, then stood, quietly leaving the room.

The Doctor didn't really notice her come back in since he was too wrapped up in his thoughts. She could tell that something was troubling him, "Hey, what's the matter?" She asked softly, sitting down beside him.

He was pulled out of his thoughts by her voice. "Huh? Oh... nothing. Just Freya's nightmare." He admitted.

"Oh, Doctor." She sighed, "It was just a silly nightmare. Do you really think I'm not going to come back?"

"Of course not. I just think it was... curious. That's all." He couldn't risk letting her know of tomorrows events.

She narrowed her eyes slightly, not believing his response, "Maybe I should just cancel since you're all making such a big deal over a silly little expedition."

He wanted to say 'yes, please, please cancel it.' but he knew it had to happen. "I thought you said it wasn't nice to break promises to people."

She glared at him, "So now you want me to go?"

"No..." The world slipped from his mouth. "But then again, I never want you to go." He said trying to cover it up.

"Well than that settles it, I won't go. I'll just tell them that I'm ill or something." She huffed, getting up and leaving the room. He felt quite relieved before he felt panic again. This was one of the most important moments in their timeline. Re-writing it could re-write their entire history. If she didn't go now there wasn't really telling what could happen.

"River." He caught up with her. He didn't think he would ever find himself trying to convince River to go to the Library.

"What?" She snapped, already picking up the telephone and dialing the number she had been given.

He shrunk away a little. "Er... Don't you want to think this through a bit? I mean...Uh... Books! A planet that is practicality made of books. If you ask me, that's a once in a life time offer."

"Well how am I supposed to enjoy the opportunity when I know that it's upsetting my entire family." She cursed under her breath as she messed up the number, slamming the phone down, only to pick it up again to redial the right number.

"I.. um... Think of how happy we'll be when you come back. And the girls are always upset when you go on expeditions." He talked quickly, trying to get through to her before she could talk to her archeological team.

"Freya's having nightmares. She's never had nightmares about me leaving before..." Someone picked up on the other end of the line.

"It's just a coincidence, River." He lied. "That doesn't mean you have to cancel this."

She put a finger to his lips before turning her attention to the phone.

"Luna university." A woman answered. It was Anita, one of her colleagues for the exposition.

"Hello, Anita." River replied, recognizing the woman's voice. "This is Professor Song." She glanced over at the Doctor.

Anita smiled through the phone. "Professor Song. It's nice to hear from you. Is everything alright?"

"Yes, everything's fine. I'm just calling to confirm what time we're leaving tomorrow."

"We'll be leaving at 9:30. Don't forget to pack lunch." She joked. She always reminded her team to pack food before a trip.

She managed to smile, "Yes, I won't forget, chicken and salad. I'll see you tomorrow." "Looking forwards to it, Professor Song." She said before hanging up.

River hung up as well, turning back to look at the Doctor. He stood there rather awkwardly thinking she'd snap at him if he tried to say anything.

"I'm going to bed." She mumbled, brushing past him. This certainly wasn't how she envisioned the night going. It had started off quite nicely, but was beginning to end in shambles.

"I..." He started but stopped when she gave him a look. He didn't want her to be sad, especially because of all the emotions tomorrow would bring. She'll probably be pissed with him when she realized that he _encouraged _her to go the Library. But he wasn't going to leave thing on a bad note.

He climbed into bed next to her. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" She asked, rolling over so her back was to him.

"For messing up our special night. And making you so upset."

"It's fine." She mumbled, her back still to him.

"I don't think it is. I don't ever mean to make you upset, River. And I feel terrible when I do."

She glanced back at him, turning slightly, showing that she was listening.

"I wanted to make you feel extra special tonight. Not like what you were doing upset your entire family."

"Well I'm sorry things didn't work out the way you planned." She whispered, looking away from him.

"Is... is there anything I can do to make it up to you?"

She shrugged, "I don't know, you tell me. How exactly do you _think_ you can make it up to me?"

"I think..." He thought a moment, trying to word himself carefully. "I think that it might help if I tell you how much I love and respect you. If I tell you how brave and strong I think you are and that I think you are going to have a wonderful time on this trip because you love archeology. And you know... I love it too, because it makes you happy and I love it when you come home and tell be all about it." He in fact hated archaeology right now because it was going to get her killed.

She tried to hide her smile as she rolled over to face him.

He was thankful to see it was making her feel better. "You have the best smile when you tell me about your trips." He continued. "And you seem so happy, almost like you're reliving the moment you found what you were looking for or found the missing piece of information you needed."

She smiled weakly, "Really?" She asked, pulling him closer to her.

"Really. And I can't wait to see your smile when you come back from the Library." Though he knew if would most likely be a frown.

Her smile widened, "And I can't wait to tell you about it." She stared at him for a moment, her smile faltering for just a second, "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too." He thought now was as good a time as any. "Wait here a moment." He got out of bed to retrieve his disregarded jacket.

"Where are you going?" She asked, sitting up as he got up.

"I have a present for you." He said from down the hall. He came back a moment later with a sonic screwdriver in hand. It wasn't like the one he currently owned, but a bit altered with dampers and other such things.

She looked confused as she noticed the screwdriver in his hand. "Why are you giving that to me?"

"I was going to give it to you the last expedition you went on." He lied. "But it wasn't ready yet. And besides, I thought it would be quite useful."

"Are you sure you want to give this to me?" She asked softly, "I know how much you value the screwdrivers you make..."

"I'm very sure." He insisted. "I still have mine, anyways. This one is for you."

"Thank you." She whispered, "That's very sweet of you." He took his place back in the bed and handed it to her.

"I think you'll quite enjoy it." He grins.

She smiled, placing the screwdriver on the nightstand then took hold of his collar, pulling him against her, "Come here, you." He was surprised by the gesture, but leaned into the kiss, happy he was doing things right for once. She kissed him deeply, pulling back and pressing her forehead to his. There is nothing that needs to be said in that moment. There is just the sound of their hearts beating together and the warmth of each other's minds.

She was breathing rather heavily, pulling him back against her lips. He ran a tongue over her bottom lip as they resumed their 'special evening'. They eagerly undress themselves, their breaths coming quicker in anticipation. She rolled her body up towards his again, kissing him roughly. Their mouths crashed against each other's and he brought a hand down between her thighs, teasing lightly.

She whimpered as her hands tangled in his hair, her hips bucking towards his hand. He circled her entrance before moving his finger slowly inside. She moaned softly, moving her hips begging for more. He went deeper, pressing on her inner walls. She groaned, kissing down his neck and lightly sucking on his collarbone. A light red mark was left where she had sucked. He hummed her name. "River..."

"Hmm?" She murmured as she moved to the other side of his neck, nipping and kissing back up to his jaw.

"You..." He slightly lost his train of thought from her kisses. "Are gorgeous. Did I mention that?"

"Mmm, maybe once or twice." She panted, her hands roaming along his chest.

"I should say it more often" He said between kisses placed along her collar. She hummed in agreement, her eyes fluttering shut. He moved his head lower to suck at her breasts. She pushed harder against him, a soft moan escaping her lips. He smirked against her skin, loving that he could unravel her by the touch of his fingers. She tried to move her hips down towards his hand again, growing needier with every touch. He pulled his hand away and before she could protest he pulled her hips onto his, slipping his length in to her.

She sucked in a gasp, her forehead pressed to his shoulder as her fingers found their way to his hair. He moved slowly to start. Enough that the pleasure could build, but slow enough that he could saver to feel of her beneath him. Her moans were muffled by his lips as she kissed him deeply and lovingly. His tongue brushed against the roof of her mouth, hips hip automatically moving faster.

She clutched onto his biceps, sucking on his lower lip. He groaned out her name, tracing his mouth down her jaw then back up again. She rolled her hips to meet his, murmuring about how much she loved him, her voice breathless. He couldn't help but let his mind wander. He thought about tomorrow and how sad she would be. Her moans brought him back to the present. She certainly wasn't sad now. He focused on her happiness, pushing the lIbrary to the back of his mind. She slowed their pace for a minute, noticing that he seemed distracted. "Doctor?" She breathed, worry replacing that happiness in her expression.

"Yes?" He replied, immediately masking his distracted look.

"Am I not entertaining you enough?" She teased, though she was truly concerned about him. "Trying to visualize some other woman?"

"I don't need to visualize any one else." He defended. "You are more stunning that any woman that could imagine. I was just thinking."

"Thinking?" She raised an eyebrow, "About what, hmm?"

"About your welcome home party." He said quickly.

She frowned, "I'm not stupid, I know that's a lie."

"Not entirely. I was thinking about you." He kissed her neck. "And how amazing you look with your hair spread out on the pillows."

"Why don't you just look at me instead of thinking about it?" She sounded a bit annoyed, though she turned her head to expose more of her neck.

"Because when I'm kissing you my eyes are closed." He trailed back up to her mouth again. "And you don't want me to stop kissing you, do you?" He teased.

"No." She grumbled, "But I'm sure you wouldn't like it if I seemed distracted."

"You're right. I'm sorry." He kissed her cheek. "From now on I will only focus" He kissed the other one. "On you."

She smiled weakly, "Good, that's what I like to hear." He kissed her lips and resumed his steady pace. She moved her hips towards his, practically begging him to move deeper and faster. He obliged to her wishes, grunting at he grew closer to his release.

She moaned loudly, her nails digging into his arms. "River..." He said breathlessly. "You'll.. wake the... kids..."

"Then...then you'd b-better find a w-way to keep me quiet." She let out another loud cry of pleasure. He covered her mouth with his as their pleasure grew and grew. She moaned into his mouth as she was sent over the edge, her whole body shaking with her orgazm. He followed right after her, groaning loudly. His movements slowed and he pulled out and flopped down on the bed next to her. She stayed where she was, not curling up against him as she usually did.

"You okay?" He asked, turning his towards her. She nodded slowly, glancing at him for a moment. "You don't seem okay." He rolled on his side to face her. She was happy just a moment ago. What could change her mood so fast?

"Why do you say that?" She asked, staring at the wall across from the bed.

"I don't know... it's just that we usually cuddle afterwards..."

She moved over to him, resting her head on his chest. "Happy now?"

"You're not..." He couldn't help but point that out. "River, what's wrong?"

"Nothing..." She whispered, closing her eyes, "I'm tired, it's been a long day." He sighed, but knew better that to push her. He wrapped his arms around her to let her know that he was there for her and let his eyes droop. Within minutes she was fast asleep in his arms, her eyelashes damp with unshed tears. He didn't know why she wouldn't tell him what was wrong, but he could guess that it was more than just hormones. Maybe she knew that tomorrow was not something to look forwards to. Maybe she knew...

He should've done a better job at hiding it, but how could he? He drifted to sleep trying to figure out the source of River's grief.

She awoke suddenly in the middle of the night, gasping and shaking. "Riv..." He mumbled, still half asleep before he realized when was going on. "River!"

"I-I...It was a nightmare." She whispered, pushing out of bed and grabbing her bathrobe, wrapping it around herself as she ran out of the room.

He ran after her. "River...?" He didn't really care if the floor was freezing or that he was in his pants. "River?"

She ran down the hall towards the girls' bedroom, throwing open the door. Amelia groaned at the sudden noise that awoke her. She sat up rubbing her eyes. "Mummy?" River stood in the doorway for a minute, just staring at the two girls.

Then she went over to Amelia's bed, "It's alright, love. I'm sorry for waking you, go back to sleep." Tears rolled down her cheeks and she quickly tried to brush them away.

"Mummy... You're crying." The young time lady didn't know why her mother was upset or why she'd come bursting into her room, but she knew that she needed comforting. Amelia shimmied out of her covers and hugged River.

River let out a small sob before she could stop herself, holding the little girl tightly, "I'm sorry, sweetheart. I'm sorry..."

"It's okay Mummy. Everybody's sad sometimes." Her tiny hand rubbed her arm.

She pulled herself together long enough to pull away from her and kiss her forehead, "You should go back to sleep, okay?"

"Not until you're not sad." She insisted. Though she was more shy than Freya, she had developed her mother's stubbornness.

"I'm alright now, sweetie, you've made me feel much better. It's very late, go back to sleep." She did her best to smile at her daughter.

"You're still crying." She brought her hand up to brush away the tear on River's cheek. "I have something that would make you feel better."

Her smile became a bit more genuine, "And what's that?" Amelia reached to the end of her bed and retrieved a coloring book with a blue marker in it.

"Here." On River's arm, in her messy 4-year-old handwriting, she drew the Gallifreyan symbol for 'Happy'.

River watched Amelia draw the word on her arm. "Mmm, I feel much better now. Thank you. And you're Gallifreyan is getting very good."

Amelia beamed and snuggled back under her covers. "Thank you, mummy." River gave her another hug before putting her head back down. "Love you."

"I love you too, Amelia." She smiled, kissing her forehead and fixing the blankets around her.

"Goodnight." She hummed, already half asleep.

The Doctor was leaning against the doorway and smiled at the scene. She stood up, walking back over to the Doctor, staring at the word on her arm.

"Her handwriting is getting better." He noted. He didn't need to ask about what her nightmare was about.

She nodded, wrapping her arms around his torso and burying her face in his chest. He automatically moved his arms around her, moving them up and down her back in a soothing motion. "I promise nothing will happen to them while you're gone. I'll keep them safe."

"I know...I know..." She held him a bit tighter, "I'm sorry."

"Shh... It's okay. You don't need to be sorry." He rested his chin on above her head. She began crying again, silent tears spilling down her cheeks and onto his chest. He rocked back and forth with her a little. He didn't know if they stood there for minutes or hours.

"I'm so sorry..." She whispered again, clutching tightly onto him.

"River, it's okay. Really, you have nothing to be sorry about." He said softly. She quickly dried the rest of her tears, letting out another shaking breath.

He knew she probably wouldn't want to talk about it so he just suggested she rest. "You should sleep. You've only got a few hours before you have to be up again." She nodded weakly, but didn't make an attempt to move or go back to bed. He kissed the top of her head, holing her tight. He wondered if she would be able to sleep on her expedition.

He gently urged her to move. She slowly began to walk back to their bedroom, still clutching onto his arm. He kept his arms around her, not daring to let go of her. Even when they climbed back into bed, he still had ar arm around her waist. She put one hand on her flat stomach, her hands trembling as curled up against him. Her back was pressed up against his chest and he placed his hands over hers to steady them. "You know there is no safer place for that child but inside you. They'll be okay, Riv."

"I know." She whispered, "It's just...my dream...it felt so real."

"It wasn't. They're safe River. They're safe." He repeated. She rolled over so she was facing him, nuzzling her nose into his chest. He reached into the nightstand beside the bed and pulled out a blue marker of his own. He thought it might make her feel better so right above Amelia's symbol, he drew the word for 'Safe' much neater than she did.

She smiled weakly, "My team is going to be wondering what all these drawings on my arm are."

"They're archaeologists. I'm sure they'll be fascinated by Timelord culture. You can tell them all about it."

"Mmm, I thought we agreed that I was supposed to keep my family life a secret from my team."

"Well... you don't have to tell them about your family. You could say... that you stumbled on a book or something." He allowed his finger to trace the ink marks. "Besides, don't have have to wear those space suit things with long sleeves?"

She watched him trace the marks on her arm, "Space Suit things?" She smiled, "Yes, we do."

"So there's nothing to worry about. " He said, making an effort to smile. She nodded, pressing a kiss to his chest.

"I love you." She murmured.

"I love you, too." He pulled close to him, hoping that she'd be able to sleep better now. She nuzzled into him, her eyes closing, much more relaxed now. "Sweet dreams." He hoped, closing his eyes as well.


	19. The Library

**CH 19**

Though it was only a couple of hours of sleep, it felt quite refreshing. River awoke tangled up in her husband's arms, smiling softly as she sat up, rubbing her eyes. The Doctor slept soundly, undisturbed by her movements. Less than a second passed when the pitter-patter of tiny feet and small giggles came from down the hall and closer to her room. River smiled as she heard the girls coming down the call. She opened the door to let them in, beckoning them over. "Go wake up Daddy." She whispered, pointing to the bed where the Doctor was still sleeping.

They nodded, but didn't get the message to be quiet and graceful. They jumped up and down on the bed, half landing of him, squealing "Daddy, Daddy! Wake up!"

River covered her mouth to muffle the laughter. "Gentle girls, don't hurt him!"

The Doctor let out a tired groan. "To late." He pushed his self up of his arms causing the girls to fall in a heap on top of him and push him back down.

River moved to the side of the bed, still giggling, "Are you alright?" He flipped over with a bit of a wince, the twins toppling to the side in a fit of laughs. He propped himself up and gave her a thumbs up before rubbing his neck. "Oh, sweetie..." She murmured, sitting on the side of the bed, massaging the base of his neck, "I'm sorry, I should have known they would jump all over you."

"No it's fine. I'm fine." He closed his eyes. humming happily at the touch of her hands. "I thought I was supposed to be giving you neck rubs." She pressed a bit harder, working out the knots in his neck and shoulders.

"Mmm, not until I get a bit bigger." She smiled, kissing his ear lightly.

"Looking forwards to it." He glanced at the girls who still seemed to be laughing at their wake up call on him.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her chin on his shoulder, "So am I." She whispered, kissing his cheek. Freya and Amelia giggled harder. Apparently the sight of their parents flirting was the funniest thing they'd ever seen.

"What are you two little monsters laughing at?" River smiled, wrapping her arms around her two little girls and attacking them with kisses. Giggles turned into laughs as they tried to escape and move to the other side of the bed. "I don't think so!" She laughed, pulling them even closer to her. They squealed as the Doctor joined in on the kiss attacks which soon became tickles. River laughed as she secured Amelia in her arms, tickling the bottoms of her feet.

"Mummy!" She tried her best to get out of her grasp, but wasn't able to. After another minute River finally let go of her, letting her catch her breath. Though she was breathing hard, she jumped up and placed her arms around River giving her a big hug. "Morning!"

"Good morning, my darling." River laughed, hugging her back.

"Mummy, will you make your special pancakes before you go?" She leaned in to whisper in her ear. "Daddy doesn't make them right."

"Of course." She murmured, kissing her forehead, "But we'd better get started, there isn't much time before I have to go."

Amelia nodded excitedly, taking her sister's arm. "Mummy's going to make pancakes!" River smiled at the girls, pushing up out of bed before shooing the girls out of the room and down the hall.

The Doctor slipped his hands around her waist and kissed her cheek. "I could help you pack so things go faster." He glanced at the clock. Even though there wasn't technically a specific time in the TARDIS, they liked to have it to keep track of things.

She nuzzled her nose against his neck, humming softly, "Yes that would be very helpful, thank you."

"Alright." He gave her another kiss and moved to the wardrobe. "What do need?"

"Just some nice pants and shirts. Nothing too tight in case I start to show." She smiled softly, her hand lightly touching her stomach.

"You'll only be gone a week..." He said, pulling a few loose blouses a a mix of trousers from the closet.

"I know, but still...I don't want anyone to even suspect." She pressed her cheek to his shoulder, glancing up at him. She took a deep breath, "Do we have anything that I should take with me in case something happens to the baby while I'm away?" It was a horrible thought to think, but she wanted to be prepared and take the proper precautions.

"Here." He rummaged through one of his drawers and pulled out a syringe. He had kept the medicine there when River was pregnant with the girls and had put it back when she told him that they were expecting another one. He placed it in her hand and closed her fingers around it. "But nothing will happen. You'll be fine."

She smiled weakly, "I know, I just want to be prepared, that's all..." She kissed him softly.

"Well I hope that this will not be empty when you get back." He offered a smile.

"What is it exactly? What does it do?" She looked down at the syringe, rolling it over in her hands.

He looked up at her a bit hesitant. "It... You know how basically all medicines are dangerous for infant timelodrs?" It wasn't really a question since he had explained it to her last time she was pregnant. "...Well this one isn't entirely safe either. It's designed to take all of the stored energy around the fetus, like from the placenta, amniotic fluid..." He paused, "And you... It turns the stored energy into chemical energy and supplies it to the fetus."

She swallowed, nodding slowly, "And umm...when should I take it? If I have to take it at all that is..."

His tone became more serious. "The baby would have to be dying. Like absolutely no question... dying. Because... River once you take it, it will drain you. You won't even be able to walk." He stepped close to her and put a hand to her shoulder. "Don't unless there's no other alternative."

She nodded, wrapping her arms tightly around him, "I promise, I will only use it as a last resort." She stepped back after a moment, placing the syringe in her open bag, "I should go make those pancakes for the girls."

"I'll make sure you're packed." He mentally made a list of the things she had with her that day. Diary, lunch, squareness gun…

"Thank you." She smiled weakly, "I'll tell you when breakfast is ready." She walked down to the kitchen, beginning to make the pancakes.

Amelia and Freya clung to her legs as she cooked. They looked up at her with big smiles. "Mummy? Can we go to the zoo when you get back?"

"The zoo? If your daddy says it's alright." She beamed, trying to maneuver around the kitchen with the girls practically attached to her. "And which animals would you like to see at the zoo?"

"Gastavis! I want to see a Gastavis!" Said Freya.

"And what about you, sweetie?" She asked, looking down at Amelia. "What do you want to see, hmm?"

"A Mantaphant." She told her. "They're the prettiest."

"Yes, I agree. The Mantaphants are my favorites." She smiled, flipping the pancakes and grabbing a serving plate. They both detached themselves from her legs and scurried to sit at the table. River turned off the stove, setting the girls plates on the table in front of them before dishing out the pancakes and calling for the Doctor. He scrambled, all arms and legs, into the kitchen. His smile was wide at the sight of the golden pancakes. She laughed, sitting down in her chair to start eating.

She had only taken a bite when her face went pale and she stood, rushing out of the room. The girls exchanged suspicious glances as their father chased after her. "River?" She ran into the bathroom, barely making it in time to be sick into the toilet. He pulled her hair back so it wouldn't get any vomit on it. He reached for the medical cabinet which he had stored saltines in for this very purpose. He offered some to her. She shook her head, pushing them away before turning and throwing up again. He rubbed her back, wincing at her obvious discomfort.

"Can you lock the door please?" She asked softly, leaning heavily against the toilet, not wanting the girls to come in.

He nodded and shut the door. "Can I get you anything?"

"Some water would be nice." She murmured, glancing over at him. He picked up a glass on the side of the sink and filled it up about half way. He handed it to her going back to rubbing her back since it was really the only thing he could do. "Thank you..." She breathed, taking a sip of the water, leaning against him.

"I packed you some saltines for the trip. I thought you might need them." She nodded slowly, closing her eyes to rest for a moment. She could hear the girls coming down the hall wondering what was going on.

Small knocks came from out side. "Mummy? Are you okay? Is daddy in there too? What's wrong?"

She glanced up at the Doctor, "Should we tell them?" She asked quietly.

"I thought you wanted to wait." Though he had no problem with telling them now, she was right that there were still risks of losing the child before the end of the trimester. He couldn't guarantee them both making it out of the Library.

She hesitated, "I don't know...what do you think?"

"I... I think maybe you're right in waiting. At least 'till after the trip." He concluded. The Library was about the riskiest part of this pregnancy. If she could get through that, then she could probably get through the whole thing.

She nodded, "Okay. I-I don't know what to tell them for now though."

Neither did he. "Tell them... er... that there was something in the pancakes...?"

She made a face, "Well then they'll make a fuss and they won't finished their breakfast."

"Than tell them... uh..." His thoughts seemed distracted by the banging on the doors. "They didn't hear you, did they?"

She nestled back against him, groaning slightly, the pounding giving her a headache, "I don't know..."

"I don't think they did. Tell them you forgot to brush your teeth or something. Do you want me to do it?" She didn't look like she wanted to move.

She nodded weakly, "Yes please." He got up slowly as not to disturb her to much. He stepped out of the room. His voice was muffled behind the door, but the banging stopped and feet headed back to the kitchen.

He popped his head back in. "We're just going to finish breakfast. You're free to join us when you feel better."

She smiled weakly, "Thank you, sweetie..." He nodded and slipped his head back out to head for the kitchen, hoping he wouldn't find a sticky mess everywhere when he returned. She stayed in the bathroom for another few minutes, then cleaned herself up and headed back to the kitchen where quite a bit of scolding could be heard. The Doctor had a wash cloth in hand and was helping the girls clean up their syrupy faces when River came in. The plate of pancakes was down to only a few, soggy with syrup. The sticky substance had made it's way all over the table.

"What happened in here?" She asked, wetting another washcloth to help clean up.

"Well the girls discovered where the syrup bottle lives." He said, his tone a bit cross.

River sighed, "Girls, I'm very disappointed in you. You know better than this. This is the sort of thing that little babies do, are you two babies?"

"No.." "

Sorry mummy." They looked down at their feet.

"Yes, you should be sorry, both of you."

The Doctor looked between River and the twins. He said in a low voice "River, maybe you shouldn't be to harsh on them..."

"No! They need to learn that they can't do this!" She was getting a bit worked up.

"They have. I mean look..." He glanced at the girls who looked very ashamed of themselves. "I just don't think yelling is the best way."

She glanced over at the girls, sighing, "You're right...I'm sorry." She whispered, kneeling down and holding her arms out to Amelia and Freya, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have yelled at you two like that." They immediately clung into her, glad the the 'scary mummy' was gone. "It's still not alright that you two made a mess, but I shouldn't have shouted like that. I'll forgive you as long as you forgive me." She held them both tightly, feeling guilty after what had happened.

They nodded. "We're sorry, mummy! Very sorry."

"We forgive you..."

She smiled, "Alright, I want you to say sorry to Daddy too."

They turned and bowed their heads a little. "Sorry daddy."

She nodded, "I need to leave soon so let's clean the rest of this up, hmm?"

"Kay, mummy." They chippered up a bit and went to clear the plate.

She washed the rest of the syrup off of the table, looking over at the Doctor, "I'm sorry for yelling."

He kissed the top of her head. "It's fine, just remind me never to get on your bad side."

"Oh shut up." She pouted, hitting his arm.

"Not a chance." He teased right back.

She looked up at him for another minute, smiling softly, "I should get going..."

He sighed. "I suppose you should..." He gave her another kiss before going to fetch her bag and jacket.

River took the girls down to the console room, smoothly flying the TARDIS to the grounds of Luna University. The Doctor came back in, sneaking up behind her and surprising her with a kiss. She jumped a bit, melting against him after a moment. "I left a special note for you in your diary. Don't worry, I didn't peak at anything, It's on the last page." He told her.

Her smile faltered, "The last page? You mean there are no more pages left?"

"There are a bunch of pages left." He assured her, though he knew it was really only more like one or two. "I don't know how many though because I didn't want to risk seeing any spoilers."

She nodded, understanding now, "I love you." She whispered, pulling him in for another kiss.

He hummed against her lips. "Don't read it until you get to the Library." He murmured in her ear.

"I won't." She promised before turning to the girls, "I'm going to miss you two so much."

"I'll miss you too, mummy."

"But we can go to the zoo when you come back!" Freya said, hoping she was looking forwards to it, too.

"Of course." She smiled, "I can't wait to go to the zoo! Be good while I'm gone, alright?"

"We will!" They clobbered her with more hugs.

She laughed, squeezing them both tightly, "I love you both _so_ much."

The Doctor could help but wrap his arms around all three (well, three and a half) of them, managing to kiss river over the heads of Freya and Amelia. "You're going to be late."

She beamed as she kissed him back, "Mmm, yes you're right, but one more thing before I leave." She took a marker out of the front pocket of her suitcase, then knelt down and drew the Gallifreyan symbol for love all of their arms, doing the Doctor's last. "Just in case you need a reminder while I'm gone." She whispered to him, kissing his cheek softly.

"I won't forget." he promised. He watched her go, his face immediately falling. He wasn't going to let her die, he knew he was going save her, but that didn't mean she didn't have to go through everything that was yet to come. He could remember her tears and how sad she was when he didn't recognize her, and the signed smell of her flesh as he sat chained to a poll, staring at the spot where she sacrificed herself. She turned to look at him one last time, smiling and blowing him a kiss before heading into the university, completely unaware of what was about to happen.

Anita, Ms. Evangelista, Mr. Lux, and the Daves' were all waiting for her. They had already changed into their suits and other Dave held out her's to her. "Professor Song. We're ready to go. You should get changed."

River nodded, "Thank you Other Dave." She smiled, taking the suit from him, "I hope you all brought lunches!" She called as she left to change. While in the back, she was rather tempted to see what the Doctor had written in the back of her diary, but she had promised that she would wait until they got to the Library.

"Professor Song! Hurry up, we're going to be late!" Called Mr. Lux.

She rolled her eyes, already knowing that she wasn't going to like him, "I'm coming! I'm coming!" She huffed, going back in to join the group.

He handed her a form once she got back. "You have to sign the contract." He insisted.

She raised an eyebrow, taking the form from him and reading it over. "I don't think so." She laughed, tossing it back at him.

"Professor Song!" He said, getting angry. "The rest of the team has already signed the contract, I'm afraid I have to insist."

"And _I'm _afraid I have to decline." She smiled, "Now, weren't you saying that we're going to be late?"

He sent a glare at her. He could tell he wasn't going to like her very much. "Come on." He waved his hand for them to follow him to the ship. She glared at his back before following in onto the ship with the rest of her team in tow. "We are going to be in here for at least a few days, everyone. So you'd better get comfortable." Mr. Lux announced before going to the pilot's chair.

River settled in one of the chairs, making sure she had her Diary and the syringe closest to her. Four long days in a ship with people like Mr. Lux and Ms. Evangelista was not at all a fun experience. Mr. Lux tried to avoid River as much as possible, the few words exchanged between them had an edge and general dislike in them. Anita was quite nice to her though and they often found themselves bonding over a game of cards. Though she enjoyed talking to Anita, her true thoughts were elsewhere, on the Doctor and the girls.

As the time passed, she imagined them playing their silly little games, having dinner which she hoped was something reasonable, then washing up and getting ready for bed. As much as she loved her expeditions, she longed to be with her family again.

The ship landed with a thud, jostling everyone inside. "Hey! My coffee!" Other Dave complained as he reached for something to clean up the spilled drink.

"Alright, helmets on everyone." She commanded as the team gathered their things. When they had all got their suits airtight, Ms Evangelista having some difficulty, Mr. Lux stepped outside. There was a large door about 20 feet tall in front of them.

"Alright everyone, listen up. There is a seires of gates and I have to codes to unlock them. We only have about 30 second to get through each one before it automatically closes."

"Or we could just use this to get through them all." River held up the sonic the Doctor had given her.

"What is that?" He questioned looking from the paper of numbers to the device in her hand.

"It's a sonic screwdriver." She smiled, responding as though it were obvious, knowing it would annoy him, "It can get you in or out of anything." She began sonic-ing the gate, the doors sliding open, "See."

"My family spent generations trying to break the codes to this thing. I spent months trying to find these numbers and you just mention this now?!" He raised his voice as he spoke.

She shrugged, still smiling, "You never asked. Come on you lot, these doors won't stay open forever." They all filed in the first gate, Mr. Lux grumbling to himself about family dishonor and such. She lead them through the rest of the gates, grateful that the Doctor had given her the sonic since she was able to open the doors with ease.

The hall they entered was rather dim. "That's odd... The light's aren't supposed to do that." Mr. Lux seemed to forget his anger towards River.

River pulled her flashlight out of her bag, handing it to Other Dave. "This planet has been empty for a hundred years, you don't think the lights would dim like that? Keep moving everyone."

"This planet is designed to generate electricity." He explained. "It can produce enough light to power three suns for centuries. It's impossible for the lights to go out."

"Well then I guess that's just another thing we'll have to figure out." She turned, following the rest of her team down the hall. After a great deal of thought, she send a message to the Doctor, coordinates for the Library signed with a kiss. She could use his help in figuring out what was going on.

"Hey guys!" Proper Dave called. He was further down the hall and pressing his head to the wall. "I think I hear something." River quickly moved to where Dave was, listening. The voices of the people on the other side were inaudible but clearly that of a man and woman. She smiled, knowing it had to be the Doctor, there was no one else there. But a woman? It was a bit odd...She tried to open the doors, only finding them to be sealed tightly. Finally, she managed to blast through the doors, smoke sweeping into the room as she stepped inside, waking up to the man she recognized to be another version of the Doctor, "Hello, sweetie."

"Get out."

* * *

River pulled her diary out of her bag, glancing up at the Doctor as she flipped through it. "You're doing a very good job of acting like you don't know me, I assume there's reason."

"Yeah, a fairly good one actually."

"Shall we do diaries then? Where are we this time?" As she began to list the places from their early days.

He eyed the diary. 'Shall we do diaries' what was that suppose to mean? He didn't have a dairy. She looked so casual as she did this, like it was a regular normal thing for them to do. Was it? She stared at him for a moment, almost in awe. "Look at you...You're so young."

"I'm really not." He scoffed.

"But you are. You're eyes...you're younger than I've ever seen you." She was a bit scared by this, he was difficult in the early days, not always agreeable and not always trusting.

"So you've seen me before then?" It wasn't really a question. Her heart stopped, he didn't lean into her touch, he leaned away...he never did that.

"Doctor...please tell me you know who I am..." A part of her already knew the answer, the answer that would surely kill her.

He didn't quite like being the one who didn't know everything. "Who are you?" The question seemed like the simplest one in the world, one you ask every new person you met, and yet her face fell like her whole world just got taken away.

She felt like she was being stabbing in the chest over and over again, she wanted to cry, or scream. How could he not know who she was? How could the man that she loved more than anything in the world have no idea who she was? It was the first time he was meeting her, so...this would be the last time she saw him... As an alarm went off and he jumped away from her, she just stared at him for a moment, before flipping to the last page of her diary to the note that the Doctor, her Doctor, had left.

_River-_

_If you are reading this, I'm probably there at the Library with you and you just did diaries. Or tried to at least. I hope you can forgive me for making you do this. For making you come to the Library and face me, but you understand why now. This is the first time I met you it's one of the most important parts of our timeline, you made a very good impression by the way. But River it's important you know I'm still here. The me who knows you and our children. I'm here. And I promise that it's not over, I promise that you'll make it out of this. I need you to listen to whatever I'm about to tell you to do without question or else things could go very wrong._

_-I love you. So, so much._

_The Doctor._

She red the last part over and over again, fighting back against her tears. She didn't want to be here anymore, she wanted to turn and runaway, but rule 7, never run when you're scared. She wanted her Doctor, her husband, to be there. But he wasn't...and so she would just have to trust his words, trust that she would see him again and trust that he did love her. Another few minutes and she managed to pull herself together, hiding all the pain she felt inside, hiding her broken heart. She walked over to the rest of the group, trying to stick to the mission.

* * *

The Doctor woke, handcuffed to a pole. His head hurt from the blow delivered to it by River. He looked over to River to see that she was... "Oh no, no no! River!" He tried to get up but was held back by the handcuffs "No, what are you doing, that's my job!"

Just minutes before he had awaken she had injected the contents of the syringe into her body, in hopes that some way, some how, the extra energy would be enough to save her baby. She could already feel her energy starting to drain as she worked with the wires, "And I'm not allowed to have a career I suppose?" She tried to sound playful, tried to keep the tremble out of her voice, "One last chance to save the Doctor..."

He reached for his screwdriver, but it was too far away. He lat out an angry noise. "Urgh! Don't do this, River! It'll kill you! I have a chance you don't have any!" He begged.

"You'd wouldn't have a chance and neither do I! You wouldn't regenerate. No, I'm not letting you take my place." She shook her head, "I'm not going to watch you die, not today, not this young... If you die here it'll mean I never would've met you. I'm timing it for the end of the countdown. There'll be a blip in the command flow. That should improve our chances of a clean download."

"River..." Why did people always have to sacrifice themselves for him? People he barley knew and people he had just met. But she hadn't only just met him. "River please…"

She shook her head, spoilers...she couldn't say, no matter how much she wanted to. "Funny thing is, this means you've always known how I was going to die. All the time we've been together, you knew I was coming here. The last time I saw you, the future you, I mean, you took me to Darillium to see the Singing Towers. The Towers sang, and you cried." As she spoke, she thought of the girls...oh god the girls...She had promised them she would come home. They were supposed to go to the zoo once she got back. She wasn't going to see them grow up…

"River you knew my name. There's only one time I would ever tell anyone my name. There's only one time I could..."

She her energy was too drained, she didn't have the strength to hold back her tears anymore. She could hear the countdown starting, this was it, her time was ending and she was going to die, alone and afraid. "Hush now, spoilers."

His pleads were useless. The countdown was complete and there was nothing he could do but shield his eyes from the blinding light emitted as River sacrificed herself for him. He was left looking at the empty spot where River had sat just moments ago. Even when he found Donna, he was still thinking about her. Who was she? She knew him so well, how could he let her just die? And of course he didn't. Of course his future self had found a way to save her. He was breathing hard and smiling like a madman when he downloaded her into the computer.

River looked around, it was impossible. How...the Doctor. Oh he was impossible. She didn't know how he did it, but he did, he had saved her. To the biggest data core in t the universe.

The Doctor materialized in the lower levels of the Library. Her Doctor. The kids had been put to bed and he locked the door behind him. He had a little over an hour before the Vashta Nerada would swarm the place. That's what he had promised. One day to get everyone out, then the Library would be consumed by the shadows forever. He hurried over to where River had sacrificed herself. It was just how he remembered it.

Empty.


	20. Your arms are my castle

**CH 20**

River was outside, walking along the edge of the river. It wasn't a real river of course, just on the computer had generated. Thoughts of the Doctor, Freya and Amelia filled her mind. He had promised in his note that this wouldn't be the last time she saw him, but maybe that had been a lie just to give her hope. After all, rule one, the Doctor lies… She didn't know what had happened to the baby. She hadn't checked yet, not wanting to risk more bad news on what already was a long, emotionally draining day.

"I can't" CAL replied for a third time.

"What do you mean you can't?! You downloaded 4,022 people into a physical form! All I'm asking is just one and a half more! Please!" The Doctor wouldn't take no for an answer.

"They are not compatible."

It was beginning to rain, well...more like pour. River's teeth chattered as her white gown began to cling to her body, already soaking wet. She had put the three virtual children to bed earlier, and it had reminded her of how she used to put her own children to bed. She wasn't aware that the Doctor was there, trying to save her.

The Doctor ran a hand through his hair. Not compatible. Not compatible. Okay. Not good, very not good. Outraged, he kicked the wall fell to his knees. He let fall the tears he had been trying to keep back for the past week. This couldn't happen. He couldn't lose her now. CAL could make humans because she was human. She had human DNA. "DNA! That's it!"

Something didn't feel right, something was off. It was getting harder to see, the rain coming down in buckets. River couldn't see the house where the others were, not with all this rain. She collapsed under a tree which provided at least a little shelter from all the rain. She would have to wait out the storm before going back home. She was trembling, her dress soaked.

CAL needed Time Lord DNA to download River properly. He looked around for anything to cut his hand with. There were a few metal fragments from the explosion River had caused that sliced his hand easily. He let out a yelp and presented the bloody hand to CAL. "Please."

Her body tingled, her head pounded and she felt like something was tugging at her, pulling her somewhere. There was a bright light and she shielded her eyes…

The Doctor stared at the spot where River's body had started to appear. "Please… Please..." He repeated under his breath, not bothering to look away from the bright light. "Please work." As the light started to fade, her eyes fluttered open. It wasn't raining anymore, and she wasn't wet anymore. Her gaze fell onto the Doctor, she couldn't move all she could do was stare at him.

"River!" He ran up to her and threw his arms around her, holding her very tight. "Oh, River. My River. " He couldn't believe this was real. He had spent so long figuring out what to do when she was gone that having her in his arms again felt almost impossible.

She pushed him away from her, holding him back so she could look at him. After a moment, she slapped him, hard. Then, grabbing the lapels of his jacket, pulling him to her and kissing him. There were so many emotions running through her head, she was furious, happy, upset, relieved. He didn't care that she slapped him. He would've slapped him, too. He pressed his forehead to hers, still crying. "River, we have to get out of here. We don't have much time." He didn't really want to move though. He wanted to just sit there and hold her and kiss her and tell her how much he loved her.

She didn't move either, her whole body shaking as she started to sob, clutching onto him. She couldn't find the right words to say in order to properly convey how she was feeling. "River..." His tears mixed with hers as he brought her into another kiss. "We have to go." He said again. He didn't know how much time they had before the Vashta Nerada returned. Probably minutes.

She was still sobbing, not having the strength to do anything else. The TARDIS was only steps away, but she didn't have the energy to move. He hooked his arm under her shoulders and legs. "I've got you." He whispered. "I've got you." She was still clutching onto him, relaxing just slightly in his arms. She let him carry her into the TARDIS, still sniffling and shaking.

"I-I thought I was never going to see you a-again." She finally managed to say.

"I promised you would, didn't I?" He set her down in the sickbay. "I will never break a promise to you."

She smiled weakly, reaching for his arm, not wanting him to leave her side, "I know, I know." She whispered, "Where are the girls? Did you tell them anything? Do they know?" She bombarded him with questions.

"They're asleep. They... They were asking where you were. It's been over a week. I told them your ship needed some repairs."

She nodded, glad to hear that they didn't know what had really happened to her. "What about you?" She asked softly, "How are you?"

"I.." He shakily reached for her hand. "I thought I was going to lose you. Forever."

She took his hand, pulling him down to her and holding him tightly, "But you saved me." She whispered, "You managed to find a way to save me."

"It almost didn't work, River. And you could've glitched or the baby could've been lost..." He took a breath to keep from crying again. "I was so scared."

Her heart stopped, the baby... "A-are you sure the baby's alright?" She asked, her voice shaking. "Doctor, I don't know if the baby really is alright..."

"I asked CAL to save them but... but you were only a few weeks." HIs voice was quiet. "River, the energy signature probably wouldn't have been great enough for CAL to register the baby as a life form." He put his head in his hands. "I'm so sorry."

She stared at him, shaking her head, not wanting to believe what he was saying. "No...no, no, no, no." She whispered, tears filling her eyes again.

"I'm sorry, River. But there would've had to be a bigger energy signature. You would've had to-to ingested something or-or.." He didn't quite believe it either. There had to be something, someway this could change.

"What about the medicine you gave me? I-I used that before...before..." She couldn't bring herself to say 'died'.

He looked up at her. "You... you what?"

"The syringe full of medicine you gave to me before I left. I took it..."

He could barely form words. "You..." His heart pounded in his ears. Maybe the universe wasn't so cruel to him after all. He jumped up and grabbed the ultrasound. "River... you may have just saved our baby's life." She couldn't breathe, like really truly couldn't breathe. Her heart pounded and her head was spinning. She prayed that the baby was alright, she would be beside herself with grief if it wasn't. His eyes were glued to the screen. He raised a hand to his mouth. "But that's..." The cornered of his mouth curves up into a smile. "That's our baby! Oh, you mad impossible woman. You saved them!"

She stared at him for a moment before breaking into tearful laughter, wrapping her arms around him and hugging him tightly, "Everything's alright?"

"Yeah... Yeah, I think so." He looked down at her belly then back up at her face, wiping away a tear from her cheek.

She smiled up at him, brushing away the rest of her tears, "I love you."

"I love you, too. Don't ever do that again. Don't ever leave me."

"I won't." She whispered, kissing him softly. "Can I see the girls?"

"They're sleeping, but I'm sure they wouldn't mind. Can you stand?"

She nodded, though as soon as she was on her feet, she collapsed onto the ground. He was by her side in an instant. "River! Are you okay?"

"I-I'm fine." She murmured, trying to push herself back up onto her weak legs.

"Let me help you." He took her arms, letting her use them as full support. She nodded her thanks, moving as fast as her drained body would allow, eager to see the girls since just hours before she believed she would never see them again. "Take it slow, River. Your body has been through a lot today and the medicine you took still has some effect you."

"I have to see the girls." She whispered, pushing herself even harder, nearly collapsing a second time.

He kept her up right in his arms. "And you will. But there's no rush, they are not going anywhere. It won't hurt to slow down a bit. Just take it easy. Please."

She huffed, slowing down just enough so she wasn't putting too much strain on her body. "Thank you."

They walked in to the girls room. He didn't bother to turn on the light. He helped River sit down on Amelia's bed. She smiled weakly, stroking back Amelia's curls gently as she began to stir. "Hello, sweetie." She murmured.

"Mummy?" She gasped realizing that she wasn't dreaming. "Mummy!"

River smiled, "I missed you." She whispered, kissing her forehead.

"Mummy, you came back." She threw her tiny arms around her.

"Of course I came back." She held her tightly, "I promised you I would, didn't I?"

"Promised." Amelia nodded. She was overjoyed that her mother was here. She didn't fully believe that River's ship needed repairs.

River kissed her face all over, knowing that it usually made her squeal. She glanced over at Freya, who was still sleeping in her bed. "Will you help me get her?" She asked the Doctor. He nodded. Their beds were pretty close together so he could practically lift her.

"Mummy?" Amelia asked. "Why can't you walk by yourself?" River looked over at Amelia, trying to think of an answer to give her, but she couldn't think of anything but the truth. She glanced up at the Doctor for help.

"Er... Mummy's just tired. She had a long trip." He covered for her.

She hoped that the answer was acceptable enough for Amelia. She gently woke Freya the same way she had with Amelia. Freya didn't question that her mother was in front of her. She almost immediately attacked her with a big hug. "Mummy, you're back!"

She beamed, squeezing her tightly, "Yes, I am. I missed you so, so much." She whispered, kissing her head.

"I missed you, too. Daddy was acting really weird without you." She nuzzled her head into her lap.

River glanced up at the Doctor, "He was, was he?" She murmured, stroking her hair.

Freya nodded. "Don't ever be gone that long again."

"I won't, my love." She soothed, her hands trembling as she continued to smooth back Freya's hair.

"Mummy?" She looked up at her. It didn't take much to see that River was full emotion besides happiness. "What's wrong?" She shook her head, trying her best to mask everything other than happiness.

"I'm just happy to be home again." She managed a smile. Her head was spinning, she felt as though she didn't have enough energy to keep sitting up straight.

The Doctor came over and put a hand on her shoulder. "Mummy is also very tired and should be getting to bed." He hinted.

She nodded slowly, "It's time to go back to bed, alright?" She whispered, kissing Freya's forehead.

"Will you still be here in the morning?" She asked sleepily, lying her head down on the pillow.

She smiled, "Yes, I'll be here." She tucked the blankets around her again, then tried to push herself onto her feet.

He was by her side, supporting her again. "I want you to sleep in the sick bay tonight." He whispered. "Your body needs a day or two to get used to everything."

She groaned, "Doctor, do I really have to? After everything that's happened, I would really like to sleep in my own bed.

He was hesitant, though after the day that they had, he was thinking the same thing. "...Fine. But I want you to wear the portable fetal monitors. Your body is not completely stable and I want to be able to monitor things."

"If that would make you more comfortable, then I'll wear them." She agreed, glad that she would be able to curl up comfortable in her bed, rather than in the cold, rather dreary sick bay.

He smiled. "Thank you."


	21. Baby Bird Don't Fly Away

**CH 21**

The Doctor helped River to their bedroom with minimal difficulty before going to get the fetal monitor, leaving her for a moment. She was afraid she was dreaming, everything was suddenly alright again… The room was rather dark, and a few shadows were cast around the room, quickly but carefully she pushed out of bed, turning on all the lights in the room, avoiding the shadows and leaning against various objects in order to keep from falling over.

He came back in the room and instantly set down the equipment. "River? What are you doing?" He moved closer to her incase she were to fall.

She jumped, a bit startled by his voice, "I-It was too dark."

"Oh..." He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. "River, you know you're safe now. I won't let the shadows take you."

She did her best to smile, trying to hide how scared she really was. "I know, I know. I'm alright."

"Why don't you get rest? We can leave the lights on if you want." He suggested. He didn't mind sleeping with them on if it made her feel safer.

She nodded, "Do you want to put the monitors on me first?" She asked, which was responded to with a nod.

"Sit." He went to pick up the monitors. He wrapped the elastic around her waist with the monitor attached to it. "It should keep track of the heart rates and such." She sighed, pressing her forehead to his shoulder.

"Do you think something is going to happen to the baby?" She asked.

"... I don't know. It's hard to say... but I think we have a fighting chance." He cupped her face in his hands. "Hey, it's gonna be okay."

"Doctor...I don't know if I can do it again. I don't know if I can handle having another miscarriage..." She looked away from him, her gaze fixed on the ground.

"River..." He didn't know what to do . He couldn't promise her that wouldn't happen, no one could assure that. He pulled her in close to him. "The risk of that happening gets smaller and smaller the longer you carry our child. In a few weeks, that won't even be a possibility. I can't promise you nothing will happen... but I can promise I'll do everything it my power to make sure it doesn't."

She clung to him, burying her face into his chest, "I'm so sorry." She whispered, "I shouldn't be putting pressure on you like this. Especially not after everything you've done for me." She had opened up to him, and was now starting to regret it, feeling as though she had told him too much, "If-If something happens, I'll cope..."

"No River, it's okay. You should have every right to be sad and upset. It's my job to take care of you when something traumatizing happens to you. You don't have to bundle it up." He held her tighter.

She shook her head, "I'm fine." She whispered, sealing her feelings off from him. "Really, it's fine. Let's just go to sleep." They settled in quickly. Neither of them had thought that they'd ever have the chance to cuddle up together again, which made all the more special.

"River. You know I'm here for you? What ever you need. I'm here."

She forced a smile, "Yes, I know..." She whispered, still clutching onto him as if she were afraid to let go.

"Do you want me to keep the lights on?"

"Are they bothering you?" She asked quietly, hoping that they weren't so she could keep all of them on. The room was really bright, but she didn't really care.

"No. Not at all." He pulled her closer wanting her to feel as safe as possible.

"Then I'd like to keep them on." She nuzzled into him, closing her eyes after another few minutes.

"Mummy?" Freya tugged on River's arm in the morning. "Mummy, wake up."

River groaned quietly, rolling over on her side away from Freya, not completely aware that it was her daughter trying to wake her up.

"Mummy, please!" Freya made her voice louder as she climbed up onto the bed. She tugged at River's arm. "Mummy wake up!" Her voice wasn't excited and happy like it normally was.

"What? What is it?" River asked sleepily, still exhausted from the events of the day before. Her eyes were still closed as she responded to whoever was pulling on her arm.

"Mummy, please! It's Mia!" She said urgently, close to breaking into tears.

The frantic tone in what River finally realized was her daughter's voice finally registered in her mind. "What's wrong?" She asked, this time fully waking up, already pushing back the covers.

"M-Mia... She's gone. Mummy, she's not there!" Freya sobbed. "I can't find her anywhere!"

"What?" She practically fell out of bed, adrenaline being the only thing keeping her from collapsing as she ran down the hallway to the girls room, "Amelia?" She called, running to her bed and pulling back the covers. There was nothing there.

Freya hugged River's leg. "Mummy..." She said between ragged breaths. "Where's Mia?" River collapsed onto the bed, ignoring the little girl at her feet as she screamed for the Doctor.

There was a surprised yelp and a lot of scrambling noises before he came running down the hall, all arms and legs, wielding his sonic. "Wha- is everything alright?!" He looked around the room, his stomach twisting. "...Where's Amelia?"

"I don't know, s-she's not here." River whispered, trying to hold herself together, though it wasn't working very well. The Doctor picked up Freya whose cheeks were stained with tears. With a spare hand, he scanned the bed.

" River… it's-it's them. It's the Silence." She shook her head, not wanting to hear what he was about to say as she clutched onto the sheets.

"No, no, no!" He ran a hand through his hair as anger and panic filled him. He probably would've kicked something if he hadn't been holding his daughter.

River continued shaking her head, jumping off the bed, running back to her room to get her blaster, then to the console room. She tried to think of places where her daughter might have been taken, frantically typing in bits and pieces of coordinates she only partially remembered. Tears slid down her cheeks and the fetal monitor she was still wearing began beeping wildly, but she barely even noticed.

The Doctor didn't realize his wife had gone from the room until the TARDIS lurched into motion. He went fast to the control room, doing his best to comfort Freya. "River?" She didn't hear him. He put a hand on her shoulder. "River!"

She shook him off of her, her mind only on finding Amelia. As she ran towards the doors. She had no idea what lay on the other side, already forgetting what coordinates she had but into the TARDIS. All that mattered to her that she had her blaster in hand, ready to shoot anyone that got in the way of her finding her daughter.

"River!" He couldn't leave Freya alone, not when she was at risk of being taken, too. "River, wait!" He followed her out the doors, holding Freya tight to his side. Any one who tried to take her would have to wrench her from his cold dead fingers. The monitor was still beeping wildly, the beeps becoming louder and more frantic.

She should have been trying to stay calm, but she was no where near calm, she could barely see where she was going as she ran out the doors, tears blurring her vision. It seemed to be an abandoned warehouse of some sort. They must've been far away from any cities or people because there were no sounds of cars or anything outside. The place was very dark and scuttling of small rodents echoed through the place. "Amelia!" River shouted, running further into the empty room, the sound of both her voice and the monitor she was wearing echoed off the walls. "Amelia!"

Very distant whimpers became audible, turning into crying as River ran further into the place. The Doctor tried to keep up, but she was much faster than him. He couldn't let her go so far from the TARDIS when the baby was in distress. She needed medicine, not to be running around a warehouse.

"Amelia!" River shouted, hearing the whimpers and running towards the source of them. "Amelia! It's alright, my love. Mummy's here, Mummy will save you!" She was shaking as she ran further away from the TARDIS, her still weak body under an immense amount of strain.

"Mum- Ahh!" Amelia screamed at the top of her lungs. "MUMMY!" She cried. He cries started to become distant again, like someone was moving her further away.

"NO! Amelia!" River screamed, pushing herself and trying to run faster. "Don't touch her! Don't hurt her! Please! She's just a child!" From around the corner, the blue light of electricity crackled. A doorway collapsed and from behind the rubble was a laugh. An evil and cold laugh of a woman. River screamed in fury and frustration, collapsing onto the ground, shaking and sobbing, the monitor wrapped around her waist almost beeping a flat line.

"River!" The Doctor's voice was still far behind her. He was running as fast as his legs would take him to get to his wife, but time was ticking. It was ticking the minute they left the TARDIS and it was ticking now, he had to get her back there. "River!" He breathed seeing her collapsed form. "No!"

She couldn't breathe, the sound of that horrible, horrible laughter ringing in her ears. "Amelia!" She used her last few breaths of consciousness to scream for her daughter, though it was pointless by now, she was gone again.

Freya had started sobbing again. Not only because for her sister, but because she didn't know why her mother had stopped moving. "River, River! Oh no no no no! River!" The Doctor set Freya down and fell to his knees in front of her. "River, wake up!" She didn't hear or respond to him, completely unconscious on the warehouse floor. "Freya, do you remember the special button on daddy's screw driver?" She nodded. "I want you to use it to summon the TARDIS." He had no idea how far they had run, but he knew there was no way he would be able to carry River back there in time. He handed Freya the sonic and moved closer to River, turning her so she was lying on her back. Her hands and knees were all scraped up and there was a large, bleeding gash running from her forehead to her temple where she had hit her head when she collapsed.

Everything was a big blur when the TARDIS materialized around them. The Doctor was dragging River's limp body to the sick bay and Freya was watching, terrified and sobbing. She retrieved the needles and equipment that the Doctor had asked her to get off the shelf with shaking hands. He wasn't much calmer than Freya was. Neither of them stopped crying for hours. Even when they finally got River stabilized, they sat crying. And they waited. They waited and waited, sitting on the couch in each other's arms, for River to wake up.

Several hours after she had been stabilized, River started to wake again, moaning in discomfort and shifting slightly. Her eyes opened slowly, and she looked up at the ceiling, trying to reorient herself. The Doctor had fallen asleep, but Freya looked up at the woman in the bed. She climbed off the couch and reached her little hand up to River's. "Mummy?" River felt Freya's hand take hers, and she turned her head, her gaze falling onto the little girls.

She didn't respond, but squeezed her hand lightly. Freya smiled for the first time that day. "Daddy said you'd be really really tired when you woke up. He said you might go right back to sleep." She managed to get up onto the side of the bed. "Please don't go back to sleep."

River tried to smile, but didn't have enough energy. "Freya..." She breathed, still holding onto her little hand. "L...Lay...down...w-with Mummy..." She was exhausted just from talking since it took so much effort.

Freya knew enough to be very gentle. She carefully placed her self by River's side, curling up into her side. "Mummy? When will Mia come back?" Hearing that seemed to trigger something inside of her, she immediately became tense, her breathing becoming heavier.

"Amelia..." Her eyes darted around the room and she tried to sit up, "Amelia...!" She nearly fell off the bed.

"Mummy!" Freya exclaimed. The noise woke the Doctor up.

"Wha- huh..? River!" He got to his feet. "River you have to stay in bed."

She stared at him, motionless for a moment, tears filling her eyes, "Doctor...my baby...Amelia..." She tried to get out of bed again, not wanting to lay around while he daughter was out somewhere in the universe alone and afraid.

"River." He held her shoulders firmly. "The medicine I gave you is making you very weak. You couldn't even make it to the console room. Please, I need you to stay in bed."

"Please, Doctor..." She clutched onto his shirt, though her grip was very weak. "Amelia... I-I don't want her to end up l-like me. Please...save her..." She begged, tears running down her cheeks, "Th-They're going t-to hurt her..."

"I won't let them." He pulled her in close. "They are not going to hurt her River. I've been running a scan for her for the past hour. There's nothing yet, but there will be soon. I promise." She cried harder when he held her.

She could only think of her poor little girl, in the same situation that she had been in all those years ago. She didn't want Amelia to have nightmares every night, she did want Amelia to have the same emotional problems that she did. She had promised to protect her girls and now she had let one of them down, and probably traumatized the other with the what had happened.

He sat there holding her for what felt like hours. He soothed his hand down her back. "River, I know how much you want to get up and find right now, but you have to promise to stay in bed. It's not just our baby's life that's on the line, it's yours too."

"I-Is the baby okay?" She asked, her voice still shaking. She ignored his last request, not wanting to promise him anything.

"For now, but it's you I'm more concerned about. I gave you some more medication, the same one as before, but the amount I had to administer it dangerous for you. It's draining your energy too quickly. I'm trying to replenish it." He pointed to the IV bag she was hooked up to. "But it's still draining rather fast."

"I don't care..." She whispered, "If it keeps the baby alive, then that's all that matters. And if I help, then we could find Amelia faster."

"River, it's straining your life force! If you take that IV out, you'll be dead in minutes." Before either of them could say anything more, Freya tapped on River's leg.

"What baby?" River bit her lip, glancing up at the Doctor, not knowing if she should tell Freya the truth. "What baby?" The girl asked again after a few moments of silence.

"Do you think we should tell her?" Asked the Doctor in a low voice.

"Well I don't know what else to tell her..." She whispered, too tired to think of a lie to tell Freya.

"I think maybe we should..." He looked back at Freya who was getting rather impatient.

River hesitated before turning to her daughter, "Freya, Mummy and Daddy have something to tell you..."

She put her full attention on her mother. She was on her toes to know what it was. "What?"

"Well, sweetie...Mummy's going to have another baby..."

Her eyes grew wide with excitement, momentarily forgetting that her twin was missing. "Like... 'nother sister?"

River nodded, coming very close to a smile, "Or a little brother."

"W-where?" She looked around the room as if it would appear there to play with her.

She laughed this time, just for a moment, "In my belly, love. The baby needs some time in there to grow and get big and strong so they can come out and play with you."

Freya looked at River's stomach in wonder before placing her hand there. "How long?"

"Eight months." She brushed back the curls on Freya's forehead, "Do you think you can wait that long?"

"Not without Mia to keep me company." She pouted. "Is that why you fell down earlier?"

She nodded slowly, "Yes, sweetie, that's why. The baby is going to make me very very tired for a while."

"Bad baby." She glared at River's abdomen and shook a finger at it. "No making mummy tired. She has to help find Mia."

"The baby doesn't mean to make me tired. And I'm perfectly capable of helping find Amelia whether I'm tired or not." River shot a glare of her own up at the Doctor.

"River..." He begged again. "You can help plenty from where you are. Please. Stay in bed."

"Doctor...I can't just sit here and wait for something to happen. I have to find her. I'm not doing any good just sitting here!"

He knew he couldn't keep her in the bed even if he tied her down. It would be like trying to convince her to not pick a locked door or not follow him into a dark corridor. She'd just go ahead and do it anyway. At least this way he would be able to keep an eye on her. "Fine, fine." He gave in. "But you're not walking." He popped up a brought a wheel chair over. "You have to use this."

"Alright, fine." She agreed, already moving out of bed, eager to be up and looking for Amelia. She had quite a bit of difficulty just sitting herself up straight, never mind getting out of bed. He let her lean on his arms, supporting her fully.

When she was settled in the chair, Freya tapped River. "Can I sit in your lap?"

She held open her arms, "Of course, darling. Come here." Freya climbed up into River's lap and settled in her arms. She didn't full understand everything that had happened that day but she understood that her sister was taken by bad people. That her parents were the most frightened she'd ever seen them and the baby in her mum's tummy was making her ill enough that she couldn't walk. She was comforted by River's warmth and searched for any more reassurance she could get.

River knew that Freya was frightened by everything. She held her a bit tighter than normal, kissing her head, "It's alright, my love. Everything will be alright." She rubbed Freya's back soothingly, tracing Gallifreyan words lightly with her fingers.

"I miss Mia..." She told her as the Doctor started moving them to the console room.

River sighed, holding her a bit closer, "I know. I miss her too, but we're going to bet her back. I promise."

"When?" She asked, hoping it wasn't as long as it would take for the baby to get there.

"I don't know. Soon..." She glanced up at the Doctor, trying to keep the distress out of her eyes. He gave her a kiss on the top of her head, hoping it would be at least a little reassuring.

They reached the console room and he parked the chair right next to him to she could see what he was doing. He pulled the scanner over to see if it had found their daughter yet. River was shaking as he pulled over the scanner, praying that Amelia had been found.

"There!" He suddenly said after a moment of tense silence. "She's been taken to asteroid belt of the Proestea solor system!"

"What are the coordinates?" She demand, typing things in.

"Z37-R17-HE07" He said quickly. He pulled as much information of the place that he could. She quickly typed the coordinates in before going about pulling levers, landing the TARDIS. "Wait, wait!" He said before she could run out the door like last time. "River, it looks like they pulled out all the stops for this. There's force fields a-and a huge amount of security a-and a lot of guns! You can't just run out there, there's no telling what could happen to you!"

She gently let Freya off her lap, "Doctor, my daughter is out there and I'm not going to let her suffer alone any longer." She pushed herself out of the chair, "I don't care what dangers are out there I'm going to- Ah!" She doubled over clutching her stomach.

"River!" He ran over to her. "River, oh god, River!" He held her and helped her lie down on the floor. He didn't care that they were in the middle on the console room.

"Doctor...What's happening?" She asked, biting back another cry of pain. He let her squeeze his hand while he did a quick scan with his sonic. His eyes went wide as he read the scan and he dropped the screwdriver, putting all of his attention on her.

"River, I need you to stay calm. Everything's going to be okay..."

"Doctor..." She hissed, still clutching onto his hand, as she disregarded his words, complete terror in her eyes, "Tell me what is going on."

"The baby i-it's..." He could barley get the words out, though the faint glow from River's torso gave a hint. "I-it's trying to regenerate."


	22. Take my hand

**CH 22 **

"T-That's a good thing, right?" River looked up at him, not thinking about the fact that her entire body would probably burn if the baby regenerated inside of her.

The Doctor shook his head. "Not for you. Not at all for you." His face quickly became panicked. He didn't have any reassurance that she would be okay. Everything that happened to her before, he always knew she wouldn't die because she hadn't gone to the Library yet. But now he was at the hand of whatever fate would decide.

She let out another yelp of pain, her hands shaking as she clutched her stomach. "Is...Is there any way to stop it?" She asked, glancing over at Freya.

"N-no..." No one could stop a time lord's regeneration cycle without killing them. "Oh god, River." His eyes began to mist over. He held her close, noticing that her skin was very hot to the touch. He wasn't going to let her go without a fight. "Freya! Go get some ice packs from the freezer. Quickly!"

"D-Don't yell at her like that..." She whispered, "You're going to frighten her..." She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to find something other than his hand to hold onto. "I'll be fine, go and get Amelia."

He couldn't image that Freya could be much more scared than she was now. "I'm not leaving you." Freya ran as fast as her feet would carry her and in half a minute brought the ice to them. "Thank you." He immediately put the ice at the source of the heat.

River looked up at him, desperation in her eyes, 'Doctor, please. You're just wasting your time sitting here with me, there's nothing you can do. Go and get out daughter. Bring her home, I'll still be here." She begged, caring more about Amelia's safe return than her own.

"Nothing I can do to stop the baby regenerating." He corrected, ignoring her pleas "But there's plenty I can do to stop it from killing you. I'm not bringing Amelia back to home to her dead mother. I'm not leaving you here to die, River." The ice pack was melting quickly, making a large wet spot on River's cloths. One hand keeping the ice in place, he moved to genitally pick River up. River clutched onto his jacket, her nails digging into the skin on the back of his neck as she felt the pain grow a big stronger. So much had happened over the past few days, she didn't know what to do. She glanced down at Freya to see how she was doing.

The girl had not let go of her special blankie since her sister had gone missing. She was long past the point of tears and it was simply fear in her eyes. Fear that her mum was dying, fear that her sister was gone forever, and fear that four and a half was about to become two. River squirmed in the Doctor's arms, "I think it will be alright if you just bring me back in the wheelchair." She whispered, wanting to be able to hold her poor little girl.

"River, we have to get you somewhere cold. You're going to burn up if we don't and I mean that in the literal sense." He was extremely serious as he passed the medbay and kept going until he reached a metal door.

River's forehead was drenched with sweat by now, "Doctor, I just want to be able to comfort Freya. Look at her." She glanced back at the little girl who was trailing behind them. She then glanced up at the metal door, "Where are we?"

He threw door open with his foot. "Somewhere cold." Inside was what looked like an engine room, with large containers that looked like water heaters everywhere. Almost everything in the room was connected to a pool like crevasse in the middle of the room. He placed River in the cool water. "You have to stay in there. Freya can keep you company."

"Where are you going?" She asked, shivering a bit when he first put her in the water. "Are you not staying in here?"

"I'm going to find our daughter. She's scared and alone. River, you're going to be okay... I think. As long as you stay in there. Freya, keep mummy safe. Don't let her leave the pool." He instructed. He bent over and kissed River before going back to the door. His mind raced with thoughts of his lost little girl and River. Though she'd recover from the regeneration with a few day's rest, he had no idea how this would affect the baby's growth. Would it accelerate it? Or have no effect at all?

"Stay safe!" She called after him, praying that both he and their daughter would return safely and soon. She looked over at Freya, leaning back in the pool. "Are you alright, my love." She asked softly, kissing the back of her hand.

Freya shakily responded the only thing that had been on her mind for a long time. "P-please don't die mummy!" She hugged River hard. "I don't want you to die!" "Shhh...Shh..." She rocked her gently, wrapping her arms around her daughter, "It's okay, I'm not going to die. It's alright..."

The few tears Freya had left in her escaped her eyes. "You promised. You promised you wouldn't leave me and Mia again."

"I know, sweetie, I know..." She whispered. River felt horrible that all of this was happening, and that poor Freya was terrified. She pulled away from her, brushing the tears from her eyes, "I'm not going to leave, alright? I'm going to be just fine. It's a bit chilly in here for you, isn't it..." She murmured, wrapping the special blanket around Freya's shoulders so she wouldn't get too cold.

"I'm okay. You're nice and warm." She rubbed her eye, finding the corner of her blankie she like liked. She put her thumb in her mouth and held it close to her face.

River kissed the top of her head, still holding her close. "Are you tired?" She asked quietly, rubbing her back gently. She tried to hide the pain in her expression every time she felt her abdomen burn more.

"No." She told her mother. "I'm awake." She timidly reached for River's hand. "Mummy? What did daddy mean when you would burn?"

"Don't worry about what daddy said, I'm not going to burn." She didn't want Freya to worry, the girl had already been traumatized enough. "Why don't you tell me what you did while I was away, hmm?'

"Daddy took us to ice cream on Krhogen. Mia got cteer tracks and I got chocolate." She recalled the happy memory of her and Amelia. "Daddy made really funny faces. An' he spilled some on his bowtie."

"That sound like lots of fun." River smiled, brushing hair out of Freya's face, "Do you want to have a little brother or another sister?" She was trying to distract her daughter with questions so to try and get her mind off of all the bad memories of the day.

"I like having a sister." She pointed out from her experiences with Amelia. "But I've never had a brother before, so I think I want to try that." She concluded. A question occurred to her. "How did the baby get in there, anyway?"

River hesitated, "You'll find out when you're older, sweetie." She whispered, the glow around her abdomen had become much, much brighter. She did her best to hide the rather intense pain she was feeling, her face pale and the rest of her body weak and tired of fighting.

Freya wanted to protest and say that she was, in fact, old enough to know, when the glow caught her eye. "Mummy... you're glowing."

She nodded weakly, "Yes, my love..." She was having a bit of trouble talking, and breathing…

Freya looked taken back at her sudden change of tone. "...It's hurting you"

"No...I'm okay..." She whispered, her eyes fluttering shut.

"Mummy...?"River had seemed fully awake just a moment ago. "Mummy?"

She didn't have the energy to respond, trying to focus on getting air into her lungs.

"Mummy?...!"Freya tried again, this time shaking her shoulder. She promised she wouldn't die. Promised. "Mummy wake up!"

"M-Mummy...Mummy's sleepy, Freya..." River breathed, her insides burning.

"I know the difference..." She said quietly. She could see River hiding her pain, but she did know why. "The glowing is hurting you. Isn't it."

River shook her head slowly, "No...no I'm..." She couldn't finish.

"You're hurt. Like when I scraped my knee on my bike, but much much worse." Freya looked down at her mother's bright abdomen. This wasn't something you could put a band aid on.

River didn't answer...she couldn't manage it. She needed the Doctor, but she had no idea where he was, and besides, he was doing something much more important.

"How do we fix it?" Freya was determined to help her mother keep her promise. And to keep her talking and conscious.

"You can't fix it, sweetie..." She opened her eyes just a little bit, enough to see Freya.

"I can." She insisted, not wanting her mum to have to suffer. "I can fix it!"

"Freya… t-there's no w-way to fix it..." She closed her eyes again.

"Yes there is!" She stomped her foot, absolutely refusing to believe it. It was obvious to her that River wasn't going to make it if she didn't do something. "Please... I don't want to be alone..."

River choked back a loud cry of pain, "I don't know how to fix it...o-only D-Daddy knows how to fix it..." She forced herself to stay awake, for Freya.

"But daddy might not come back." Tears started to fall from her eyes. She was scared of that. That her sister and daddy might not come home and her mum might die. Then she'd be left all alone .

"I promise Daddy will come back." She looked up at Freya, holding her arms open so she could pull her into a hug, "It's okay, darling. I'll be okay." It may have been a lie, but she would say anything to comfort her daughter.

"I don't want you to die." She could feel the heat from River's skin like the oven when she peaked in to see if the cookies where done. "I can save you."

River shook her head again, "No...no. It'll be alright. You don't have to do anything." She brushed Freya's hair back, kissing Freya's forehead softly, which felt cold compared to her own skin.

"You won't." She sniffed. "The glowing's going to take you away from me."

"Nothing will _ever_ take me away from you." She soothed, stroking her hair. "I love you."

"But the glowing..." She sobbed. She didn't understand what it was, but she could see it was hurting River.

"Shh, the glowing is coming from the baby. It's helping make the baby stronger." She tried to explain, not wanting her daughter to be afraid of the regeneration energy, although she was right, it probably was killing her.

"But it's making you weaker. I don't want a new brother if it's going to kill you!"

"I..." She didn't know how to respond to that, her heart breaking.

"Why doesn't it make you strong too?" It didn't make sense that the light could weaken her mother whilst strengthening the her, what she assumed was a brother.

"It can only help one parson at a time. And besides, it's the baby's energy." She needed the Doctor, it was getting harder to breathe.

"Why does the baby have energy? Why don't you have any?" Freya demanded.

"It's a long story...One that I don't have the energy to tell right now..."

"Could... Could I give you the energy?"

"No! No, absolutely not." Her tone changed immediately, completely rejecting what she had just said.

"I have some, don't I." She ignored River's protests. If she had the light, she could save her mum.

"Freya, you can't use your energy for me. You'll get very sick if you do...I'll be alright without it. I just need to stay cold." She moved a bit further into the pool so Freya couldn't reach her, just in case…

"If I have it, and baby has it, why don't you?"

"Because I used it all." She answered softly. She was so tired, she wanted to sleep…

"Well what if I only use a little? I promise not to use all of it." She begged. Seeing her mum's eyes droop made her hearts quicken.

"I said no, Freya." Her tone was a bit sharper than she had meant it to sound, but if she used a single drop of her daughter's energy she would never be able to forgive herself.

Freya huffed and dipped her hand into the water, immediately pulling it out. It was warm. She looked up at River in shock. River barely registered the shocked look of Freya's face. Her brain wasn't functioning correctly, she suddenly couldn't even tell Freya was in the room.

"No! It has to be cold!" Freya darted her head around, looking for something, a button maybe, that would cool down the water. "It has to be cold!" River let out a quiet whimper in pain, her skin starting to turn bright red like a sunburn. "Mummy!" Freya cried. She started to run around the room, looking at walls and machines, anything to save her mother. "Has to be cold. Make it cold!" She yelled at the TARDIS.

River suddenly felt the temperature of the pool drop again as the TARDIS hum filled the room. Freya breathed hard as she raced back over to the pool, clinging to the side and staring at River. "Mummy..."

"It's alright, love...Mummy's f-fine." She was unable to suppress another moan of pain.

"It's still hurting you..." She bit her lip when River moaned.

"It's alright..." She repeated, her abdomen glowing brighter than ever.

Freya cried out in surprise and fear. "Mummy! What's it going to do to you!?" "Nothing...nothing..." She murmured, her eyes closing again, "It's helping the baby..."

"You said that last time..." She didn't want to watch her mother die. She couldn't stand there and do nothing and she couldn't run away either. "Mummy I'm scared."

She didn't know how to respond because in all honesty, she was scared too. River moved back to her side, wrapping her arms around her again, "It's going to be alright. You don't have to be afraid."

"And you don't have to die." She hugged River tighter as she willed herself to emit a yellow light of her own.

"Freya! No!" She shouted, quickly pushing out of her arms, and moving as far out of her reach as she could get. It faded as she pulled away, though some of the energy had already touched her skin.

"Mummy... Why won't you let me save you?"

"Because it will hurt you if you try to help." It could possibly kill her, but River didn't want to scare her even more.

"But only used a little!" She claimed.

River still shook her head, "I said no." She suddenly heard a bang from the console room. There was another and another until the sound of a door bursting open and then slamming shut was heard very clearly by the both of them.

River quickly jumped out of the pool, shielding Freya in her arms in case the person who had just entered the TARDIS was an unwanted intruder. "Melooodyy. Melody Pooond" A sing song voice rang out.

"No no no..." River whispered, scooping Freya up and holding her tightly.

"You have to stay cold. Daddy said to stay in the tub." She whined.

"Melody, come out, come out whereever you aaaree"

"We're going to play a game now, Freya. We have to stay very very quiet and hide." River could feel tears start to burn in her eyes. She would _never_ let anyone get Freya. She quickly looked around for a place to hide.

"Did you really think you could hide your little family from me forever?" The voice grew closer.

"Mummy, who is that?" She whispered.

"No talking." River repeated, running towards a door at the other end of the room.

The clicks of heels searching for them stopped outside the room they had just left. "Melody, you know we are going to find you sooner or later."

She had to stop running for a moment, pressing her lips together to muffle the whimpering sound she made as she clutched her stomach.

"River, run!" It was the Doctor's voice followed by a loud slap and a cry of pain from him.

"Doctor!" She shouted, wanting to run to him, but knew she had to get Freya as far away from her as possible. She only ran a few steps before she moaning much louder, squeezing her eyes shut.

"River!" Another slap.

"Tisk tisk, Melody. You were much better at hiding and keeping quiet when you were a child. Perhaps motherhood has softened you." River was shaking violently, still holding Freya as tightly as she could. She knew she couldn't run forever, but she wouldn't give up. Her heart pounded and she felt like she was on fire.

Freya squirmed in her arms and managed to get back on the ground. She took the hand of her mother's that wasn't holding her belly and lead River away from the scary voice. "Come on mummy." She whispered.

She squeezed her hand, running with her daughter as fast as she could manage. It was getting hard to breath again, she could barely keep on her feet. The TARDIS corridors twisted and turned, trying it's best to lead them away from Madame Kovarian, but she was just as quick.

"Melody, stop playing games. I don't think you want to find out what happens if you don't."

"Come on, sweetie." River whispered, trying to run faster with her. There was a room, a very special, secret room that nobody could get into. If she could get Freya there, then she would be safe from Madame Kovarian. Her legs suddenly gave out from beneath her and she collapsed.

"Mummy!"

"Oooh. 'Mummy, mummy.' You really are a disappointment, Melody."

She could see the door she was trying to get to just at the end of the hall. "Freya! I want you to run to that room and not come out until I say so, alright? Everything's going to be alright, you'll be safe there, I promise."

"I can't leave you!" She reached down for her mother's hand, and tugged it.

"Please, Freya..." She begged, gently pushing her in the other direction, "I'll be just fine, just go, please."

Before Freya could protest again, a woman in a black suit with maybe a dozen creatures behind her, two of them holding the Doctor tightly be his arms, came into the hallway. They shot electricity from their hands and Freya bolted, running as fast as should could to the room and locking the door behind her.

She felt a rush of relief once Freya was locked in the room knowing that she would be safe in there. There was plenty of food, entertainment and she knew the TARDIS would be able to take care of her. A few of the electricity shots hit her and she withered in pain. The glow around her belly dimmed as she was hit.

"River!" The Doctor cried out only to be hit in the face again. The spot was quite bruised at this point. He struggled against the Silence. "No! Don't touch her! Please, just leave her be! River!"

"Doctor..." River breathed, her eye lids drooping as she tried her very best to fight against the urge to just let go and sleep. She could already feel the burns forming on her back and side.

The Silence came towards her. "Keep her alive for now." They moved to pick her up, but immediately let out something between a shriek and a roar before recoiling away from her fiery skin. Their hands turned a nasty shade of red, white, and purple.

River was fairly certain that she was going to combust into flames. She was pretty sure she had tried to struggle when they attempted to lift her, but she could no longer feel her limbs. She managed to look up and see the Doctor, her eyes pained and sorrowful. He looked back at her, completely horrified that such an awful thing was happening to her, to his family. The TARDIS was working hard to drop the temperature of the room.

Kovarian glared at her servants who had fail to capture River. "What are you waiting for? Get her!" They lunged again, but were unable to touch her without getting burned. She tried to move away when they lunged for her, but she couldn't manage it. Her head felt heavy and her eyes fluttered shut.

"No! River!" He struggled harder than before, managing to get out of the Silence's grip. They raised their hands to attack him, but he prevented the electricity from leaving their fingers with his sonic. He was only thinking of his wife as he fought his way to her. He bent over her, careful not to touch her skin, but blocking any attacks made on her.

And when he opened his eyes, they had been teleported to a 'cold room'. She seemed like she was asleep, her eyes closed. The cold air around her warmed up in a matter of seconds. The glow around her belly hadn't gotten any stronger since she was hit with the electricity.

"No..." He instinctively reached to stroke her cheek, forgetting that it would burn him. He let out a hiss at her hot skin. He looked over at the cold water and back at her limp form. Taking a breath, he held her from under the arms and dragged her to the pool, his hands blistering. The water around them boiled almost immediately, but River's eyes snapped open as she started coughing.

"River!" His eyes widened not knowing what to do. He tried patting her back to help her clear her lungs. After a minute she managed to catch her breath. She stared up at him, trying to formulate words, but couldn't manage it. "Shh, shh... It's okay, Riv. You're safe now."


	23. Regret is for the dead

**CH 23**

The Doctor knew the TARDIS would keep the Silence far away from them, eventually leading them somewhere they'd never return from.

"W-Where are the girls?" River asked, suddenly noticing the bruise on his cheek, "You're hurt..." The freezing water was rapidly cooling down her whole body.

"I'm fine. And Freya's safe. Absolutely safe." It didn't burn when he touched her cheek this time, though his hands were still sensitive and stung quite a bit.

"What about Amelia? Where's Amelia." She took his hands, looking down at them, her eyes growing wide in horror when she saw the burns.

"She's..." He avoided looking her in the eye. "They've still got her." He finished the sentence quietly.

"She...She..." River took a deep breath, moving to get out of the pool, "I have to go get her."

He holds her by the shoulders. "No. Absolutely not. You are not leaving here."

She tried to push him away from her, "I have to find her. Madame Kovarian is going to hurt her...I-I can't let her be held captive for any longer."

"River, I'll find her. I promise. But you need to stay cool. Please, I can't let you nearly die again." He pushed her back down.

She shook her head, "You said that the last time and she still isn't here. I'm coming with you, I'll be fine." The glow around her abdomen was dimming.

"River, you can't." He eyed her belly. "We still don't know the effects this had on you and the baby." He changed the subject back to her.

"What do you mean?" She asked, staring up at him, "Something else could be wrong with the baby?"

"No, not wrong... It just that..." He thought a moment of how to explain it. "Regeneration energy heals. You can go from dead to living in minutes." He didn't need to repeat this, he knew she already knew that bit. "...It improves you... like when you last regenerated, you went from a young adult to a fully fledged adult... My point is, what if it grows? What if the baby goes from a five weeks to eight months because of this?"

"I-" She frowned, she had actually been looking forward to enjoying this pregnancy and enjoying being pregnant. She would be rather disappointed if the baby was suddenly eight months and ready to go. "Well I don't look eight months pregnant, do I?"

"Not now, no. But we don't know if you'll stay that way." He took her hands and squeezed them. "I'm not willing to take that chance. I need you to stay here."

"I want Amelia back." She whispered, squeezing his hands, "With Madame Kovarian somewhere in the TARDIS, this could be our best shot at getting her back."

"I'll go. And I swear on my life, this time I'll bring her back safe. But you have to promise to stay here and let the TARDIS monitor you."

"Are you sure you'll be alright by yourself? What about Freya?" She asked, "Where is she now?"

"Still in the room you sent her to." He soniced the far door and got up to open it. The TARDIS had moved the room Freya was in to here.

"Freya?" River called, watching the door closely.

Silent sobs came from inside. Freya was hugging her knees to her chest when she looked up. "Mummy...? Daddy...?"

River jumped up from where she was, running over to her and enveloping her into a hug, even if most of her was soaked, "It's alright, my love, everything's alright. Mummy's here..." The Doctor bent down to join the embrace. Freya didn't say anything, just cried quietly into her parents arms, more that relieved that they weren't dead.

After a while she shakily asked. "Why is this happening to us?"

"I don't know, sweetie." River whispered, squeezing her eyes shut trying to hold back tears, "I don't know..."

"I want Mia back!" She mewled. She had never been away from her sister for this long before.

"I want her back too." River whispered, stroking her hair, "Daddy promised to bring her back."

The Doctor stood up. "I'll be back soon. Cross my hearts."

"Please, stay safe." River whispered, standing up and pressing a kiss to his lips.

"I will." He kissed her back, just for good measure before leaving. The door diapered behind him so Kovarian wouldn't be able to find them.

She sighed as she watched the door disappear. "Do you want to take a nap with Mummy?" She asked, turning back to Freya.

The girl nodded, not wanting to go through waiting in anticipation for her sister again. She wanted to wake up, and for this all to be over. Since there was no bed in the room, River gathered up all the pillows and blankets the TARDIS had provided, piling them in a nest like fashion for her and Freya to sleep in. Freya snuggled in close to her mother. Her tears had stopped, though her breathing was still shaky and uneven. Sleep came quickly for her. After Freya had fallen asleep, River had spent a good hour crying and worrying about her husband and other daughter. She had finally fallen asleep not long before the Doctor came back, not hearing him because of her complete exhaustion.

The Doctor fell asleep, slumped against where the door would be nearly as soon as he returned. And in his lap, with a neon green cast on her leg and a few rainbow band-aids, was Amelia.

It was Freya who stirred first. She slowly opened her eyes and stretched a little bit with out really leaving the safety of River's arms. And then she spotted Amelia. "Mummy, wake up!" She loudly whispered.

"What? What is it?" River asked, snapping awake at the sound of her daughter's voice. She looked around the room, her eyes falling on Amelia and the Doctor. "Oh, Amelia..." She breathed, getting up and running over to them. Freya trailed behind her, not sure if she was still dreaming or not.

Amelia shifted a bit, but still slept, exausted from the events of the past few days. River was horrified by the sight of the cast and the band-aides. She brushed back the curls on Her daughter's forehead, not wanting to disturb her sleep too much. She quickly checked over both Amelia and the Doctor, make sure there was no other damage done to either of them. Then she realized, she felt a bit different. She put a hand to her belly which had grown just a tiny bit, enough for there to be a small curve to it. She couldn't have been more than another few weeks along, but it was a relief compared to the thought of suddenly being eight months pregnant.

The Doctor stirred, moving his head a little. "Mm... !" He opened his eyes, surprised to see River and Freya next to him. He moved to sit up but stopped, realizing it would disturb the sleeping child in his lap. He smiled at her. "Told you I'd get her back."

She smiled and nodded, leaning in to kiss him softly. "I love you, so much."

"I love you, too." He glanced down at the small swell of her stomach. "Hmm..."

She followed his gaze down to her stomach. "It's only a few weeks difference." She murmured, "I told you I would have been fine coming with you."

"Then who would've kept Freya company?" He looked at Freya who was still looking at her sister, waiting for her to wake up.

River didn't have an answer for that, looking at Freya. "Mia's very sleepy." She whispered, "I don't think she's going to wake up for a while, so why don't you go back to sleep, alright?"

" 'm not tired." She said, her lie failing when she yawned a second later.

"I think you are, my love. Come on." River moved to lift her up and carry her back to their makeshift bed.

"No." She squirmed. "I want to stay with Mia!"

River sighed, putting her hands on her hips. "If I bring some pillows and blankets here, will you sleep?"

She hesitated, then nodded. "Yes." She quickly scurried back to Amelia's side.

River brought over the blankets and pillows for Freya, helping her get settled before moving to sit on the Doctor's other side. "Are you alright?" She asked.

"...Yeah." He gently scooped Amelia out of his lap and placed her next to Freya. "What about you? How are you burns?"

She shrugged, "I haven't really been thinking about that. I've been more worried about you and Amelia."

He sighed, got up, and went to the other room. He came back with some burn cream and bandages in his hands. "Let me see."

"Doctor, they're fine. Just sit and rest, you've had a long day." She reached up to take the cream and bandaged out of his hand.

"So have you." He sat back next to her. "It won't heal properly if you don't do anything about it."

"I'm sure it's fine." She whispered, resting her head against his shoulder. "As long as it didn't hurt the baby."

"The baby's fine, Riv." He rested a hand protectively over the small bump. "Promise to take thing easy this time?"

"What? I didn't take things easy the last time?" She looked up at him, an eyebrow raised.

"Well..." He thought back to all of the things that happened last time. "Actually you did. The danger kept seeming to find us."

She nodded, "Well then I can't exactly promise you I'll take it easy this time around. Plus, you seem to be forgetting that we have two daughters that need taking care of and you know as well as I do that I'll always put them before myself."

"No need to remind me." He leaned over and kissed the top of her head. "I just think, with all that's been going on, we should be taking extra precautions to try and keep us out of harms way."

"Like what?" She asked, moving a bit more in his lap, snuggling up against him.

"No more just running out of the TARDIS. Check the scanner first." He suggested.

She frowned, already not liking the new rules, "Anything else?"

"I think I should do some more rewiring. I've been trying to improve the security so the Silence can't get in, but obviously it isn't working. Maybe you should help me."

She nodded, "And I want the girls to sleep in our room." She held onto him a bit tighter, "At least for a few days."

"Yeah. We can make their room closer to ours." He looked down at her and held her close. "It'll be okay River."

"You don't know that." She whispered, tears springing to her eyes, "Maybe having children was a mistake."

He was taken back. "Freya and Amelia were not a mistake. We knew it was going to be hard..."

"Yes we did, but maybe the decision to have them was selfish. They're always going to be in danger because of _us_. Is that really fair? Is it really fair to this other baby?" She got up off of him, walking towards the other side of the room, "I love them, really I do. But sometimes I can't help but think that it was selfish of me to want to have them."

"I don't think bringing more timelords into the universe was selfish at all." He stood up and took a few step towards her. "Yes, they are in danger a lot of the time but..." He took a second to gather his thoughts. "When I brought your parents onto the TARDIS, I thought it was selfish of me to put them in the danger I was in. They nearly died, many times, but that didn't stop them from staying with me. There was danger, but there were so many other things, too. Space Florida, Venice, pirates... They stayed through it all. River, our lives are terrifieying and scary, but it's also beautiful and exciting. And it might be worth being in mortal danger to experience the joy of our daughters."

"I want them to be happy." She whispered, "I don't want them to constantly be afraid." She turned to look at them, "I don't want to see what happened to me happen to them." She had had several nightmares about it over the years, and it seemed that with every passing day, the nightmares were going to come true. "I would give up everything for them, but I'm afraid that it won't be enough." She did her best to blink back her tears, looking away from him.

"Oh River..." He stepped closer and put his arms around her. "They won't be afraid for their whole lives. Look at them now. They're happy simply because they are home. I know I can't promise you that nothing bad will happen, but I can promise we will always be there for them. We will always protect them." She held him tightly, burying her face in his shoulder. Her body was heavy with sleep as she held onto him, completely washed out and exhausted after everything that had happened the past few days. He could feel her body sag tiredly. "Do you want to sleep?"

She nodded, "Only if you sleep with me." She breathed, looking up at him.

"Wouldn't have it any other way." He half smiled and went to retrieve the rest of the blankets and pillows. She went over to check on the girls while he was getting the blankets, kissing their foreheads. They shifted a bit and smiled in their sleep.

The Doctor placed the things next to them, spreading out the blankets to resemble something like a bed. "Sorry we don't have an actually bed." He would prefer that his pregnant wife didn't have to sleep on the hard surface of the floor, even if it was slightly cushioned by pillows.

She smiled weakly, "It's alright, I don't mind." She lay down on the blankets, turning so she could see the girls from where she was. "Though I may need someone to rub my back tomorrow..."

"That's what I'm here for." He lay next to her, turning so he could wrap a hand around her waist and rest it on the small bump. She hummed, her hand moving to cover his. "You look about nine or ten weeks now." He observed.

She nodded in agreement, "I'm glad I'm not suddenly eight months..."

"Me too. I'm looking forward to giving you foot rubs." He grinned in remembrance.

She raised an eyebrow, "You're looking forward to it? Do you remember, the last time I was pregnant you started talking to them right about now, then you wouldn't stop talking."

He chuckled. "You can't blame me. Having a baby is an exciting thing! I'm excited!"

She laughed, "You're right, it is. We still have to tell Amelia..."

"I'm sure she'll be just as excited as Freya was." He couldn't wait to see her face when they told her.

She smiled, then yawned, "What happened to her leg?" She asked, a bit sleepily.

"She had a hairline fracture on her tibia. It looked like it was from a fall." He lied. River would have panicked if he told her it was a spiral fracture from someone twisting her leg.

"How long until we can take the cast off?" She asked, her eyes closing.

" 'bout three weeks." He half yawned. He hummed a kiss into her neck. "Why don't we worry in the morning. "

"Good idea..." She breathed, drifting to sleep in his arms only minutes later.


	24. Happiness was born a twin

**CH 24**

The Doctor woke to Freya and Amelia's laughter. Slowly opening his eyes, he saw that they were giggling about the pictures Freya had drawn on Amelia's cast. River was still sleeping, completely exhausted from the events of the days before. He pressed a kiss to her hair and whispered, "Morning, love." Even though she probably couldn't hear him.

She stirred a bit, her eyes slowly opening. "Morning, sweetie." She whispered a bit groggily, her back aching as she sat up.

Amelia turned her attention to her mother. "Mummy! 's it true we're gonna have a lil' brother?"

River was a bit surprised by the question at first, then smiled, "Well...it's true that there's going to be another baby in the family, but I don't know if it's going to be a boy." She ran a hand across her slightly swollen belly.

Amelia's gaze followed River's hand. "It's in there?" She questioned.

She nodded, smiling, "Do you want to come say hello?"

"It can hear me?" The girl's excitement built. She stood up, the cast making the task rather difficult, and clumsily went closer to the swell of River's belly.

"Yes, the baby can hear you, my love. And in a few months, he or she will be able to mentally communicate."

"Really?" She would've been jumping up and down if her leg wasn't so sore. She placed her hands on either side of the bump. "...Hello. I'm your big sister. You're gonna love it here. There's games and cookies and mummy promised we'd go to the zoo, so hurry up or we'll have to go without you."

River smiled, stroking back her daughter's hair, then glancing over at Freya. "Do you want a turn too, sweetie?"

She nodded excitedly. "Hello! I'm your other big sister. I know me and Mia's voice sounds the same, but there really are two of us. Mummy said it'd be a really long time before you get here and I don't want to wait that long to see the Mantaphants. But I promise we can go again when you come out so you can see them too." She looked up at River. "Right mummy?"

"Yes, of course." She whispered, beaming down at her before looking up at the Doctor, "And I'm guessing you're going to want to have your turn too..."

"Absolutely." He shifted so his head was close to her stomach. "Hello there." His voice was a bit quieter than the girls and less rushed. "I'm your dad. Your mum and I can't wait for you to get here. We're going to have a lot of adventures, so I hope you're ready for a lot of running." He half joked and kissed the small bump.

"I love you." She breathed, leaning in to kiss him.

"I love you too." The twins squealed as their parent shared a passionate kiss.

River laughed at the sound of them. "I suppose we should get breakfast ready for the two of them."

"If the TARDIS will let us out of here..." The place where the door usually was, was still just a wall.

"Do you think Madame Kovarian is still in the TARDIS?" She asked, glancing over at the wall.

"...I don't think so... wouldn't the TARDIS have gotten rid of her by now?"

He furrowed his eyebrows and thought out loud. "Maybe she just doesn't want us to leave."

She frowned slightly, "Well why wouldn't she want us to leave? We can't stay in here for long..." She glanced around the room. There were a few cabinets full of food and emergency medical supplies, toys filled a basket to entertain the girls, a few books and a medical scanner. Other than that, the room was rather empty.

"Maybe she's just trying to keep us out of danger..." He ran his hand along the wall, feeling the hum. "What's gotten into you? You can let us out, we're safe now."

River watched as he spoke to the TARDIS, hushing the girls and pulling them into her lap. "Mummy, is Madame Kaveran the mean lady?"

"Yes, sweetie, that's Madame Kovarian." She whispered, her eyes still fixed on the Doctor.

The TARDIS made an irritated sort of droning sound before letting the door reappear. "Ah, see? Was that so hard?" River sucked in a sudden gasp as the door opened, one hand moving to her stomach. The Doctor glanced at her. "You okay?"

She let out a shaky breath before shaking her head, "Yes, I-I'm fine, sorry."

"The Silence are gone, River. The old girl wouldn't have let us out if they were still here. She's probably just paranoid or something." He tried assuring her.

She shook her head, "No, no it wasn't that...I thought I felt something, but...but it's way to early. It must have been my imagination."

Freya and Amelia bounced excitedly. "It moved? I wanna feel!"

"Well...um...no, I don't think the baby moved, it's too little right now." She was still a bit confused as to what she had just felt.

"Aww" They pouted. "When will it be big enough?" Asked Amelia.

"Not for at least another month… Now come on, breakfast time." She quickly changed the subject, leading them out of the room.

The Doctor followed, putting a hand around River's waist. "River... are you sure you didn't feel anything?"

She stopped walking for a moment, "I don't know...I mean, I couldn't have, could I?"

"It's not completely impossible. Maybe you're further along that we think."

"Or maybe there's something wrong..." She whispered, wringing her hands. "I'm sure it was nothing..."

"River..." He didn't want her to be worried again. After all of the stress and danger they were just in, he wanted her to have at least a day before she started worrying again.

"What?" She asked, looking up at him, it was obvious by the expression on her face that she was stressing and worried already.

"... Whatever happens, your family will always be there for you. We'll be here." He smiled a little. He avoided saying that 'everything was going to be okay' because by now the phrase must've been annoying her. "Everything's going to go the way it's going to go… and I think that it'll be okay."

She sighed, "I know, I know I'm sorry." She said, taking a few deep breaths, then turned to walk to the kitchen.

"No need to be." He trailed along behind her. In the kitchen, they found that the girls had managed to climb on top of the counter and were exploring insides of the shelves.

"Amelia! Freya! Get down from there!" Her eyes grew wide as she rushed over to the counter, making sure they wouldn't fall.

Freya carefully jumped down, but Amelia had a much harder time with it because of her cast. "Mummy, can you help me down?"

River nodded, lifting her with only a little difficulty. "I don't ever want to see you two climbing on the counter again, do you understand? You could fall and get very hurt."

"Yes, sorry mummy." Amelia was not interested in having another broken leg.

"It's alright, I just don't want you getting hurt." She sighed, looking up at the cabinets, "What do you two want to eat, hmm?"

"Eggs and bacon!" Freya said immediately.

Amelia made a disgusted face. "Can I have ham instead?"

She nodded, ""Freya can you get the eggs for me?" She looked back at the Doctor, "Do you want to make the bacon and ham?"

Freya got the eggs out delicately, moving extra slow as not to drop them. The Doctor reached around her for the meat and in a few minutes, the smell and sound of sizzling bacon filled the room. River had busied herself making the eggs. She had just finished and was dishing them out when she dropped the pan, food going everywhere as her face went pale.

Amelia and Freya were startled and stared down at the splattered eggs, while the Doctor looked at River. "River... are you okay?" He asked quickly, noting the light shade of her face.

"I-I...I need to check something..." She breathed, quickly running out of the room. He would've followed her if Freya and Amelia didn't look so upset over the spilled eggs. He cleaned up the mess and made some more eggs as quick as he could, eager to get to River.

He set Amelia and Freya up with their breakfast. "Now don't make a mess and come find daddy when you're done, okay?" And with that he was off the find River. "Riv...?" He called softly through the hallway.

She opened the door of the bathroom, her face still drained of all color. "Doctor...I-I need you..." She whispered.

He moved to her as quickly as he could without running. He didn't want to panic, or at least show that he was panicking, because that would just make everything more chaotic."What's wrong?"

She was trying to stay calm as well, her hands shaking, "I um...I'm spotting." She looked up at him, struggling to hold back the rush of fear and worry she was feeling, "I don't think what I felt earlier was movement, I think it was cramping… I felt it again in the kitchen but it was much stronger."

"Do you... do you think you're having a miscarriage?" He didn't really want to say it, but he had to ask. Spotting and cramping was normal in the first trimester of pregnancy, but if River felt something was wrong, he wanted to be extra sure. He didn't want to take any risks.

"I don't know..." She whispered, "This is what happened the last time I had a miscarriage." She closed her eyes, leaning towards him, "Can you check, please? Is there something you can do?"

"Yes." He said. There were a lot of things he could try, none of which were very pleasant, if she was miscarrying. "Come on." He took her hand and lead her brusquely to the med bay.

She squeezed his hand, "Doctor...I'm sorry..."

"Why?" He glanced back at her as they approached the med bay. He let go of her had and fetched the equipment.

"After everything that's happened, you don't need this stress." She sat down on one of the cots, closing her eyes.

"Neither do you." He pointed out, squirting the petroleum jelly on on her stomach.

She sighed, looking up at him, "I don't want anything to be wrong..." Her expression tugged at his hearts. She looked scared and anxious, and over all convinced she was having a miscarriage.

"You know... the risk of a miscarriage lower drastically after eight weeks." He tried assuring her, but turned his attention to the screen as an image began to appear.

"Yes, but it's not as low as it would be if I was twelve weeks..." She refused to look at the screen, terrified of what she might see...or not see.

"River..." He turned his head to her. Seeing that she wasn't looking, he took her hand. "Look. Look there." He lifted a finger to the screen, outlining the person like shape.

"Still in there." She let out a breath of relief, "Is everything alright? Why am I bleeding and cramping?"

"The bleeding is normal." He told her, pressing some buttons on the ultrasound. "The cramping I'll have to look into." He seemed to be in his fiddle-with-wires-and-recite-every-peice-of-information-you-know, sort of mood. She nodded slowly, still a bit nervous that he didn't know why she was cramping.

The Doctor started to get to work, enlarging the image, looking at the heart rate, when Freya and Amelia came to the doorway. "Daddy, we're done-" They paused and looked at their mother lying in the bed. "Mummy. Are you sick?" Freya still has some bacon crumbs on the side of her face.

She glanced over at the Doctor before responding to her, "No, I'm not sick, sweetie." She beckoned them over, brushing the crumbs off of Freya's face.

"Then what are you in bed for?" Freya recalled the last few days of River being in this bed and sick.

"An' what's daddy doing?" Asked Amelia as she climbed onto the bed after her sister.

"Daddy needs to check and make sure everything is alright with the baby." She explained, glancing over at the screen. "See right there?" She pointed to the image on the screen, "That's your little brother or sister."

Freya titled her head to the side. "Why doesn't it look like a baby yet?"

She smiled, "Because it has to grow, as it get's bigger, it will start to look more like a baby."

"Is that why your belly got round?" Amelia asked, investigating the strange gel still on the bump.

"Yes, darling, and it's going to keep getting bigger, right up until the baby is ready to be born." She glanced over at her husband, trying to see what he was doing.

"How does it get out?" Amelia puzzled. The Doctor looked very concentrated as he clicked a few more buttons then nodded to himself.

"Well...I think that's a question for another time." She pat her head, still looking at the Doctor, "What is it?"

"Your body's just in a little bit of shock from the increased growth. It's nothing to harmful, but I'm going to put you on a magnesium drip to stop the cramps before they get worse. they'll be gone in a couple of hours." He went to get the magnesium and was a little startled when he turned around to see the girls on the bed with River. "When did they get here?"

"Do we have lidocaine you can use instead? It's a bit less draining than magnesium." She smiled as she pulled the girls closer to her, "You didn't hear them come in?"

"Er... no. To be honest, I was a little, well a lot, engaged in the research..." He seemed a little embarrassed. He exchanged the magnesium for lidocaine and hooked it into and I.V.

Her smile grew a bit, "Well it's nice to know that you were so engaged. Now I know that you can't have missed anything." He smirked smugly and kissed the top of her head.

"Why does the baby have to take so long?" Freya whined.

River laughed, "I've already told you, it has to get bigger."

"Yeah, but why does it have to take so long? Eight months is forever."

"I don't know, sweetie. Some babies have to take eight months to finish growing."

"Can't you just tell it to hurry up? Please?"

"How about you ask instead." She shifted uncomfortably, feeling another cramp.

"Baby, you have to come out soon because I don't like waiting. I'm sure you're board in there too, so finish growing soon!" She said to the small bump.

"You know, I was very impatient for you two to be born too." She kissed her forehead.

"Did we take this long, too?"

"Mmm, yes you did." She smiled over at the Doctor, "And we were very excited to meet you."

"Will you tell us the story of how you met us? " She asked, wanting more details.

"Could you get the little blue box from underneath our bed?" River asked, turning to the Doctor. She would have gotten it herself, but knew that he wouldn't let her leave the bed until the I.V had finished. "You mean when you were born? Or when we found out we were going to have you?"

"Both!" Amelia piped up before Freya could respond. They both shifted to be more comfortable on the bed and looked at River, eager to hear the story.

The Doctor returned with the box and handed it to River. She opened the box which was filled with sonogram pictures, pictures the Doctor had insisted on taking of her while she was pregnant, a few of just her, a bunch of the two of them. Of course there were pictures of the girls as babies. There were very old pictures in the box too, such as pictures of Amy and Rory.

"Who's that?" Amelia pointed to the picture of River standing with a woman who had flaming red hair.

She smiled sadly, "That's my mummy. Her name was Amelia too."

"Am I named after her?"

She nodded, "Yes you are."

"...Where did she go?" If Amelia had a grandmother, she was sure she would've already met her.

"Well, she..." River shook her head, "Let's look at some other pictures."

"Mummy... she what?" Freya pushed, wanting her to finish the sentence.

She closed her eyes, sighing, "She was sent away. She's not here anymore."

"Does that mean I won't get to meet her?" Amelia pouted. She looked so happy in the picture, her smile much like River's.

"I'm afraid so." River whispered, trying not to think about how badly she wanted her parents to meet their grandchildren.

"Does that mean we have a grandpa too?" Freya asked. River nodded, not speaking. "Do you have a picture of him?" Freya asked as Amelia scooted closer to River, curling up to her in an attempt to make her feel better. She could see that the topic was upsetting her.

She held Amelia close to her, pulling a picture of Amy, Rory and the Doctor out of the box. "Right there, next to your Dad." She pointed.

Freya giggled happily at the picture. It didn't matter to her so much that she'd never get to meet met them, but that her family was more than just the four of them in their blue box. There was a new place in her mind where a red-headed woman and her husband sat on a park bench laughing like they did in the pictures. "Did you go on adventures with them?"

"All the time." River smiled, thinking back to all the adventures they had together.

"Will you tell us about them?" She asked, forgetting about her promise to tell them about when they were born.

"Maybe some other time, sweetie." She murmured, not really wanting to talk about her parents, knowing it would just make her sad.

"Mummy, if Mia's named after gran, then who am I named after?" She asked curiously, hoping to get a story out of it.

"Well, you'll have to ask your Daddy, he picked your name out." She answered, wanting the Doctor to explain the story behind her name.

"Gallifrey." He said, sitting on the end of the bed and scooping Freya into his lap. "You were named after my home planet: Gallifrey." She watched his face carefully, making sure that he was alright talking about the origins of Freya's name.

He smiled as Freya asked more about it. "Well, was a quite beautiful place. Orange skies and red grass. Lot's of little hiding places for children your age. I remember my favorite hiding place by the brook. You had to sneak behind the bridge without falling off."

"Don't give them any ideas, sweetie." River warned, smiling as she looked at the two girls who seemed intrigued by the description. He nodded, snapping out of the memory, and reached for a picture in the box before they could ask to go the Gallifrey.

It was one of the Doctor and River near the end of her pregnancy with the twins. In fact, this one River had insisted on taking: winning against the Doctor at chess for about the billionth time. River smiled when she saw the picture, "I like that one..." She whispered, moving a bit closer to him. He looked at it and blushed realizing which one it was.

"Why does daddy look so grumpy in that one?" Asked Amelia.

"Because I beat him in chess and he hates losing, especially to me."

"Will you teach me how to play chess so I can beat daddy, too?" Amelia said through giggles.

"Of course, my love." She laughed, pulling another picture out of the box. This time it was just River. She was in a dark blue dress with beads near the bottom that looked like stars.

The Doctor remembered her saying that she looked fat and him saying she looked stunning. "Told you, you looked beautiful."

"Oh please, I looked huge." Though, she would have to remember where she put that dress, since she would probably be needing it again. "Do you remember this one?" She pulled out another picture, the Doctor sitting in the rocking chair, right in the middle of the newly made nursery.

"Oh, yeah!" He smiled. Their room looked different now, though. The cribs had been replaced with regular beds and there was a chest full of dress up cloths in the corner. "That was right about when we found out there were two of you in there."

River tensed up a bit, not exactly wanting the girls to know that they didn't know that, especially not with the way she remembered reacting to the news. She quickly reached into the box to pull out another picture.

"Oh look at that! There's the two of you! That maybe a day or two after you were born. Look how tiny you were!" He chuckled.

"I think you should have stayed tiny forever!" River grinned, kissing Amelia's cheeks. Amelia squirmed a little.

Freya picked up one of the pictures of River. "So this is what you're gonna look like when the baby gets bigger? Is that why you have a bump now?"

She nodded, "Yes, I'll look like that. Since the baby got bigger, my belly did too. That's why."

"So what happens when it runs out of room?"

"Well that's when it will be born."

"How do you know when it wants to be born?"

"Well...when it's time for the baby to be born, I'll feel it." She answered, glancing up at the Doctor.

"What do you mean?" Freya persisted. The Doctor shifted a little. Many thoughts ran through his head about when the baby would be born. It would happen on the TARDIS, but they couldn't leave Freya and Amelia with a friend. Would they have to tell them and include them? They thoughts were clear on his face.

"It...It's going to hurt me, so when my body starts to hurt a lot, I'll know that the baby's ready to come." She was a bit distracted by the look on the Doctor's face. She really didn't want to girls around while the baby was being born, but there wasn't much else they could do with them.

Freya didn't like the idea of her mother in pain. "Did it hurt when we were born?"

"I'm afraid it did, but it was worth it because I got you two." Of course she wouldn't tell the girls all the details of of what happened when they were born.

"Sorry for hurting you, mummy." Amelia hugged her. Freya got off the Doctor's lap and hugged her too.

"Oh, girls...It's alright." She whispered, hugging them both tightly. "I love you both so so much and if I had to go back and do it all over again, I would." They peppered her with kisses.

The Doctor beamed. "Girls... why don't you go play. Mummy needs to rest a bit and let the medicine do it's job." She gave them each a kiss on the forehead, helping Amelia get down off the bed. Freya jumped down and they hurried off to their room to get their toys.

The Doctor repositioned himself on the bed, sitting a little closer to her. "I suppose we should talk about that..."

She nodded, "Could we have someone come and watch them? Like Martha, or maybe the Torchwood team? I really don't want them in the room with us."

"The whole team?" He half chuckled and nodded. "I don't think the whole team is necessary to babysit our children."

She smiled, "Well I don't trust Jack alone with them. And I'm not exactly sure the rest of them would be able to handle both girls."

"Well what if I let him bring Ianto? Ianto's great with kids."

She nodded, "That should be good. We need to talk to them about it. And maybe they could come spend the day with the girls so they're not complete strangers." She was obviously worrying.

"I think that's a lovely idea." He kissed the top of her head in reassurance. "It'll be fine, River. I sure they'll be more than happy to meet the girls."

"Can we talk to them today? I want to make sure than can do it as soon a possible." She smiled weakly, squeezing his hand.

"Sure. But you know there's no rush. You're not even out of your first trimester yet."

"I know..." She took in a deep breath, calming herself, "But you know that I'll be worrying about it until it gets done."

"I know. You gonna be okay here for a bit? I have to make the call."

She nodded, relaxing back in bed. "Make sure the girls aren't making a mess."

"Right." He said over his shoulder as he left the room. And after helping the girls tidy their room up a bit, he finally went to the console room and dialed Torchwood.

River pushed herself out of bed, pushing the I.V pole down the hall with her to the console room.

"Yes. Yes! No it is- I'm not going to explain this to you again: It's me!- hang on." The Doctor pulled the phone away from his ear. "River, you should be in bed!"

She shook her head, sitting down in one of the console room chairs. "Do you need help?"

It would be useless to try and get her back to bed. "Still trying to convince Jack I'm the Doctor. He hasn't seen me since my last regeneration." He turned his attention back to the phone and sighed. "Yes. No- Jack- why would you- No! Argh!" He ran a hand through his hair. "Will you talk to him?"

He asked River. She nodded, taking the phone from him, "Hello, Jack."


	25. Captain of Sass

**CH 25**

"River?...! You're not some recording are you?" Jack questioned.

River laughed, "No, I'm not. Are you giving my husband trouble?"

"Well I..." River was one of the very few people who could intimidate Jack. "You can never be too careful. And how was I supposed to know he wasn't lying?"

"Mmm, yes you're right, but I can assure you that it is him. Now did he tell you why we're calling?" She smiled over at the Doctor, satisfied that she had gotten Jack to believe her quicker than he did.

"Didn't give him a chance. What can I do for you, River?"

She bit her lip, trying to think of how to ask him, "Well, we need to ask a favor of you and Ianto. Are you aware that we have...children?"

"..." There was a very long pause that lasted longer than a long pause should last "Come again?"

"The Doctor and I have twin daughters." She explained, "Nobody is aware that they exist, it's safer for them that way."

"The Doctor would _never_ have kids." He chuckled. "Wait... are you serious?"

"Yes I'm serious." She snapped, hormones kicking in, "Why would I call and tell you that if it wasn't true?"

"...Sorry. It's just... wow. Twins, really?" He was still in disbelief.

She smiled when she pictured the girls, "Yes, twins...We were wondering if you could watch them for us?"

"Like, babysit? What, are you sick of them already?"

"Yes babysit and no we're not sick of them. Actually, well...I'm pregnant, again and we need someone to watch them when I go into labour." She spoke quickly.

"Wow. The Doctor really gets around doesn't he." He chuckled to himself. "Well you're not in labor now are you? I expected a little more notice than this."

"No, I'm not. It's still a whiles away, but we were wondering if you would come and spend a day with the girls some time. That way they'll know who you are and they won't be as scared."

"Scared of old uncle Jack? They'll love me, River. Trust me." He chuckled again. "Let's see. I'm free next week. May 11th, 2016. Hey, that's Mother's day! Happy Mother's day, River."

She smiled, "Thank you, Jack. We'll be there to pick you up. And I want you on your _best_ behavior, they're only four."

"Yeah, yeah. Got it. No buying them their first laser blaster until they're at least ten."

"Oh, you're horrible!" She teased, "I'll see you soon."

"Bye." He said in a sing-song voice, hanging up.

"Well that sounded... interesting." The Doctor commented.

"Interesting in what way, my love?" She asked, walking over to him resting her arms on his shoulders.

"Interesting as in Jack being, well, Jack. And you being you. You could sass each other out of existence." He leaned forwards for a kiss.

She laughed, kissing him. "He's coming next week on Mother's Day." She sat back down in her chair, one hand resting on her belly, "The cramps haven't stopped yet..." She breathed.

He leaned against the console, glancing at the I.V. bag. "It's not even half empty yet. You've got to give it a little more time to work. And we can try magnesium if it doesn't."

"I know..." She sighed, putting a hand to her forehead. "I just want everything to be alright."

"Me, too. And I'm going to do my very best to make sure that happens." He assured her.

She smiled up at him, "I know you will." She quickly changed the subject, "So we'll pick Jack and Ianto on May 11th, 2016 and they can spend the day with the girls preferably under our supervision."

"Sounds good. And we have a lot to catch up on anyways. I think we should wait 'till you're a bit more stable though."

She shook her head, "I think the sooner the girls meet them the better, just in case..."

"In case what?" He questioned, straightening up a bit.

She bit her lip, "In case something happens and we need them to come watch the girls."

"...Oh." His shoulders lowered a small amount. "Well, I want you to spend the rest of the day resting up. So how about tomorrow then?"

She nodded, moving closer to him and kissing his cheek. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to stress you, but I want us to be ready for anything."

He took her hand and gave it a squeeze. "We're ready." He told her. "We're quite prepared.

"Should we go check on the girls?" She asked, glancing to the door after hearing delighted shrieks coming from down the hall. He nodded, wrapping her arm around her waist.

"They probably made a mess again." He muttered.

She laughed weakly, "I'll help you clean it up, don't worry." She rest her head against his shoulder, walking down the hall to the girls room. Inside, the twins had made the best fort they could manage. Their beds were pushed closer together and a few blankets and pillows created the roof and wall.

Freya came out of their creation, wrapped in green clothes and plastic bead necklaces. "I am the princess of the forest! You shall bow before her royal highness!"

River smiled, bowing for her, "Hello, your royal highness. You look beautiful today in all those necklaces."

"Thank you mum- er, visitor. The queen will see you now." She lifted the 'door' to the fort, inviting them in.

"Can the queen come out here and see us instead?" River asked, glancing up at the I.V. pole which definitely wouldn't be able to fit beneath all the blankets without destroying the fort they had made.

"But, mum," Freya said, breaking character. "Mia's the queen because her leg is hurt. So she can sit on the throne and not have to use it. Plus I want you to see the inside."

"I'm sorry, sweetie, but I can't go in. I'm still taking the medicine and it won't fit inside. Maybe next time." She smiled, moving Freya's hair out of her eyes.

"Hmm... Oh! I know!" Freya crawled up onto the beds and as carefully as she could, lifted the blanket roof back, only knocking over a pillow or two.

"Hi, mummy!" Amelia waved to her mother from her pillow throne. The rest of the inside was strewn with toys and pillows.

"Hello, sweetie." She waved, glancing up at the Doctor as the mess beneath the blankets was revealed to them.

He snickered. "It's absolutely lovely, girls. But how do you suppose we're going to clean it?"

"We're not!" Freya chirped, "It can stay like this forever!"

"Well, it has to be cleaned up eventually... but I suppose it can stay like this for a while. If it's okay with your mother."

River hesitated, "But we have company coming over tomorrow..."

"We'll get it done before bed." He guaranteed, glancing between her and the girls.

"Well then I guess it's alright, but I want _everything _put away for when Mummy and Daddy's friends come over."

"Friends? What friends?" Freya bounced.

"Jack and Ianto. They're coming over to meet you and play for a while."

"Jack and... Yantoe?" She tried pronouncing their names.

"How'd you meet them? Amelia questioned.

"Do you want to tell them?" River asked, letting him tell the story since it was more his than hers.

"Well..." The Doctor sat down at the entrance of the fort and Freya sat with him, ready for a another story. They loved his stories. "It was a very long time ago. At least three hundred years I think. No, it must've been more. Five, Six hundred...? Anyways, I was traveling with a girl named Rose and we went to London during world war two."

"Where was Mummy? Was she there too?" Freya interrupted, thinking that River would have been with them if she was friends with Jack and Ianto too.

"Er... no. Actually, this was before I met her." He admitted, scratching the back of his head. Freya nodded, crawling into River's lap as once she had seated herself next to the Doctor. "So Rose and I," He continued. "We were following this piece of, well it was space junk but we didn't know that at the time. We thought it was something valuable." He continued that story all through him dancing and how the world almost ended. It was almost an hour before he finally concluded "...and that's how I met your Uncle Jack."

Freya stared at him with wide eyes. She had cuddled into her mother a bit more during the "scary" bits. She had giggled at the thought of her daddy dancing with whoever this lady Rose was. "I want to dance with Uncle Jack!" She exclaimed, scrambling out of River's lap and jumping around them.

He laughed at the thought. "How 'bout I give you a few lessons?" He jumped up, his excitement matching her's. "Put your feet on top of mine and hold my hands." He instructed, a goofy smile on his face.

She did as she was told, stepping up onto his feet and taking his hands, already giggling. He started to move around the space that was not taken up by the fort in a sort of waltz, humming to himself to keep the beat. River laughed as she watched the two dance, her eyes full of amusement and adoration.

"Mummy, I want to dance too!" Amelia complained, upset that she couldn't because of her leg.

"Alright, come here you." She helped her out of the fort, scooping her up and spinning around with Amelia in her arms. The girl squealed with delight, holding into River's neck. River laughed, kissing her cheeks and spinning and dancing around with her.

"Don't drop me!" She giggled as they spun. She was getting a little dizzy, but she didn't care. She love dancing with her mum.

"I won't sweetie." River beamed. She tried not to think about how heavy Amelia was and how much carrying her was straining her back.

" 'm dizzy now. Can I go down?" River nodded, carefully setting her down on a few pillows. She rubbed her back as she stood. "You okay, mummy?" Amelia asked, looking up at her. Freya hopped of the Doctor's feet, curious as to what her sister and mum were up to.

"Yes, I'm fine, sweetie." She lied, forcing a smile as she continued to rub her aching back. The Doctor came behind her, discreetly taking over rubbing her back. He kept up the smile, knowing River probably had a good reason for not telling them.

"Why don't you girls clean up your room?" River leaned back against his hands, seeking more pressure on her back. The girls nodded, Freya going about putting all the toys back in the toy box while Amelia tossed the pillows back onto the bed from where she was on the floor. "Thank you." She praised.

"Your mother and I mother have to go... discuss plans for your Uncle Jack coming tomorrow." He began to usher River out of the room.

Freya grabbed onto his pant leg, tugging him back, "Is Mummy okay?" She asked, worried that her mummy was sick again.

"She's fine, Freya. She's just a little tired is all." He explained.

"That's what you said the last time. Is she going to get sick again?"

He bent down eye level to her and stroked the side of her face with his thumb. "Not if I have anything to do with it." She sniffled, hugging him tightly around the neck. He rubbed the back of her head. "She'll be fine." Freya nodded, finally letting go and going back to finish cleaning up. He felt a little bad leaving them, but he needed to see what was wrong with River.

They made it into the hallway before he asked. "River, what is it?"

"My back is killing me." She groaned, "And I think the cramps are getting worse." She let the smile fall, the pain he was feeling finally showing on her face.

"Let's see what we can do about that." Back in the sickbay, he switched her to magnesium, even though the lidocaine hadn't completely finished. "Want me to rub your back?"

She nodded eagerly, "Please do." Her lower back ached, making her feel like she could barely move.

He lifted her shirt up to expose the skin of her back. "...oh. Erm- River..." He said calmly. "You actually might not want me to do that."

"What? Why?" She asked, unable to even turn to look at him.

"I told you this would happen." He muttered to himself. "River, your burns, from when the baby regenerated, they're infected."

She sighed and buried her face in her hands, "Infected? Is it bad?"

"Well... it looks like the lidocaine aggravated it." He examined the inflamed redness of her skin. "It must be deep if it's giving you a backache this bad."

She looked up at him, trying to shift her body in the least jostling way possible. "I really didn't want to be spending my entire pregnancy in the sick bay." He sighed in agreement, rubbing her shoulder. He was trying his best to keep her healthy, but by the looks of it, it seemed more and more likely that she would be spending most of her time here.

"Will you let me give you something for it?" He remembered her refusing before.

She nodded, looking down at her hands. "If it'll help then fine."

He geniality got up and started searching the medicine cabinet. _Not safe for pregnant women, ear aches, fevers, not safe, not safe, band-aids, not safe, allergies, stomach aches, sore throat, Ah! _"Found it." He finally said. He held up a vile of indigo-ish liquid. "This should help."

She didn't question what it was. She had been trying to stay positive, trying her best not to worry, trying to think that everything was going to be alright. But all those positive things were quickly fading. "River.." He sat next to her, handing the medication to her. He brought a hand up to stroke along her jawline. "We'll get through this."

She looked away from him, "I was so happy that we were having another baby."

"_Are. _We _are_ having another baby. Are you no longer happy about it?"

She stayed quiet for a few moments, "I don't know..." She finally whispered, "I'm worrying over everything and I'm sorry. I know I shouldn't be worrying so much, but I can't help it. Nothing ever seems to be alright, something always goes wrong. I know you said that complications with twins is more common, but it doesn't keep me from thinking that something could go wrong. Should we be concerned about when I go into labour with what happened with Amelia? Or what if Madame Kovarian comes again? What if..." She trailed off, burying her face in her hands.

"Oh, River." He wrapped his arms around her and held her tight, peppering kisses to the side of her head. "You're not wrong for worrying. You have every right to worry with the kind of life we have. The complications with that happened with Amelia, that was because you were straining your body to hard. We can easily avoid that when this one comes 'round. And Kovarian... well." He hesitated. He knew she had managed to get out of the TARDIS alive, but not without serious injuries. "She won't be coming around for awhile. And If she does, you'll be safe. You'll all be safe and I'll make sure of that."

She leaned against him, "Why are you so good to me? "

"Because I love you. And it's my job to make everything up to you."

"You don't have to make anything up to me."

"I do." He bit his lip. "Everything that's happened, because I couldn't protect you. I was even the one who insisted you go to the Library, even though I knew what was waiting for you. How can you ever forgive me for that?"

"If I hadn't gone, then we may never have met and it really wouldn't have mattered what happened after that." She brushed her lips up against his jaw, "What happened wasn't your fault, and I want you to know that."

"But all the things that could've gone wrong..." He brought a hand up to caress her face, cherishing the touch of her skin.

She leaned into his touch, "It doesn't matter. Don't you remember what I told you when we were there when you tried take my place?"

"I'll never forget it." He sighed, knowing she was right.

She knew that he was sad, and she wrapped her arms around his chest, kissing his cheek, "I love you, _so _much. There are going to be hard times, and sad times. But there will always be happy times too. When I see you and when I see the girls, I know that I couldn't imagine my life any other way. I wouldn't _want_ it any other way."

"River Song, my River Song." He fully embraced her. "How could ever have thought you were gone when you're right here in front of me?"

She smiled, "I'll always be here for you, sweetie." He pressed his forehead against hers.

"Always. And River Song, I know there are people out there who would tear the universe apart to take away our family, but don't think for one second that I wouldn't tear apart every universe to protect you and our children."

"Don't worry, I know." She squeezed his hand lightly, "You've certainly proved that to me over the years."

"And I'd do it all over again." His smile was full of love for her and love for his family. She pulled him up closer to her, kissing him again. There was suddenly a loud crash from down the hall which sounded much like shattering glass. He let out a small gasp, surprised at the sound, which was soon taken over by worry. He stood up, wondering what he might find. River stood as well, moving as quickly as she could out of the room, her eyes wide with worry. He didn't bother telling her to stay put since she probably wouldn't have listened anyways. They raced to the source of the sound which was Amelia and Freya's room.

"Amelia? Freya? What..." River trailed off as she arrived at the doorway, looking into their room.

Amelia looked up at her with teary eyes. "I... I'm sorry mummy. I was just trying to help. I didn't mean to..." The mirror that had hung on the wall had fallen and appeared to have knocked a few picture frames and a lamp.

"It's alright, sweetheart." River soothed, avoiding the glass that littered the floor as she walked over to her.

"I'm really, really sorry!" She hugged her mother, still afraid that she was in trouble.

"Shh, shhh it's okay. It was just an accident." River whispered, glancing up to see Freya on the other side of the room, about to attempt to walk through the glass. "Don't move, Freya."

"K, mummy." Freya obeyed, putting her foot back down on the clear patch of floor she was in. She seemed a lot less traumatized than Amelia was. River continued to try and calm Amelia, looking to the Doctor for help as she rocked back and forth. He looked between the glass covered floor and Freya.

"Hang on." He carefully stepped over to her. Even though he was wearing shoes, he didn't want to make it worse by stepping on the glass. He reached her and lifted her triumphantly.

"We'll clean this up, alright? It's going to be fine my love." River murmured, pressing a kiss to Amelia's head.

"Your.. not mad?" Amelia whimpered.

"Of course I'm not mad. It was an accident, you didn't mean for it to happen."

"I was trying to help. " She said, nuzzling her head into River.

"I know, I know." She kissed her head again. "I'll clean this up, you just stay put alright?"

She nodded as her tears dried. The Doctor put Freya down next to Amelia. "You stay with your sister." He went to help River clean. It didn't take long for them to clean up the mess, sweeping to make sure every bit of glass was gone.

The Doctor straightened out his back and looked over at the girls. They, well, Amelia still looked pretty stunned at the events. "Why don't you girls go to the kitchen? I'll make you some hot cocoa." Freya bounded out of the room excitedly, Amelia wobbling as she tried to get up and walk around on her own. The Doctor lifted her up, glancing back at River to see if she was coming.

River followed after him slowly, her back still bothering her. He set Amelia down in the kitchen. "Do you want one, River?" He asked retrieving the mugs from the cabinet.

She smiled tiredly and nodded, "Yes that would be lovely." She helped Amelia into a chair as Freya bounced around excitedly, very enthusiastic about her hot chocolate. He smiled as he took a third mug and set it down next to the others.

A short while later, three hot chocolates, just the right temperature, with whip cream where put down in front of the three. River raised an eyebrow, "You're not going to have one?" She asked, watching as Freya got whipped cream all over her face.

"Nah." He waved his hand. "Not really in the mood for one at the moment." He pulled out a chair next to River and sat down.

"Hm...I'm surprised. You've never turned down a hot chocolate before." She teased, leaning over to kiss him.

He blushed a little. "Well, there's a first time for everything."

"So is this hot chocolate my Mother's Day present?" She smiled, pecking his cheek, "Since tomorrow is Mother's Day."

"I suppose so. But that doesn't mean it's your only present." He winked at Freya.

She looked genuinely surprised, "Really?"

"Spoilers." He grinned at her, wanting to keep it a surprise.

River yawned, still sipping at her hot chocolate. "Try not to spill that, love." She reached over, pushing Amelia's mug further way from the edge of the table.

"Sorry." Her tone wasn't timid or upset anymore. The hot cocoa was making her feel much better. River smoothed back the little girl's curls, kissing the top of her head. " 'm tired, mummy." She said through a yawn.

"Yes, I think it's time for bed. You're going to need lots and lots of energy to play with Uncle Jack tomorrow." Amelia nodded, leaning her head against River and closing her eyes a little. She scooped her up, kissing her forehead and carrying her towards the door.

The Doctor followed with a sleepy Freya in his arms. He asked in a low voice. "You still want them to sleep in our room?"

She nodded quickly, "Sweetie, do you want to go get any of your stuffed aliens?" She asked Amelia quietly, knowing she probably would.

"The Adipose." She answered groggily. "An' the blue pillow."

"Okay." River whispered, collecting the requested items from Amelia's room, as well as her pajamas before heading to her own room.

They lied the twins down in their bed, Amelia already asleep, and Freya awake enough to mutter a "G'night" before going to sleep herself.

"Good night, my love." River kissed both their foreheads, then turned to the Doctor, "We should probably go to sleep too."

"Let me have a look at your back first." He kept his voice quite as not to wake them. She nodded, sitting down on the edge of the bed with her back to him so he could look.

He delicately lifted her shirt. "It's starting to heal. I'm going to put some cream on it, is that okay?"

"Yes that's fine. Just, try to be gentle."

He nodded, leaving the room and coming back with the bottle and a q-tip to spread it on. "It's going to sting a little."

"Alright, I'm ready." She whispered, biting her lip. He lifted her shirt up again and slowly applied the cream, as genitally as he could. She only winced once, squeezing her eyes shut.

"Sorry." He apologized, hearing her breath hitch. He finished, putting the bottle on the night stand on her side of the bed. "We'll have to apply it every night before bed until it's healed."

She nodded, kissing his cheek softly, "Thank you." She turned to crawl into bed with the girls. They fell asleep, their daughters curled up between them. River slept contently, relaxed knowing the girls were safe in the bed with her. The Doctor's thoughts were on the surprise for River. He'd have to wake up early, and he'd probably need Jack's help picking it out.


	26. Mother's Day

**CH 26**

Morning came, and the Doctor woke up early. Perfect, everyone was still asleep. He looked around the dark room and stretched his arms out before getting out of bed, trying his best not to wake anyone.

Freya began to stir when he got out of the bed, "Daddy?" She called sleepily.

He turned around. "Er... Freya. I- uh- go back to sleep, sweetheart."

"Where are you going?" She asked, a bit more awake now.

"I'm... er..." Not able to think of anything off the top of his head he decided to tell her. "I going to get your mother a Mother's Day present. But It has to stay a secret so it'll be a surprise."

She hopped off the bed, "I have a present for Mummy!"

"Shh, we mustn't wake mummy." He whispered. "What is it?"

Freya ran out of the room and returned a few minutes later, "Can I give her this?" She asked, holding up a picture she had drawn of their family while River had been at the Library.

He smiled warmly. "Absolutely. I'm sure she'll love it. Why don't you put it on her nightstand so she'll have it when she wakes up?" He suggested.

She smiled and nodded, tip toeing over and placing it on the nightstand where River would see it. He planted a kiss on her forehead. "Go back to sleep now."

"What about Mia? Can she give Mummy a present too?"

"Uh.. yes..." He looked over at Amelia who was sound asleep, curled up next to River. "But I don't know if we can wake her without waking mummy."

Freya jumped on the bed, shaking Amelia's shoulders, nearly waking her mother in the process. "Mmm, what?" Amelia groaned,annoyed at her sister for waking her up.

"Do you have a present for Mummy?" She whispered.

Amelia thought, rubbing her eyes as she became more aware of her surroundings. "Yeah, the cup with the glitter and stuff."

"I'll go get it!" Freya bounced off the bed, knowing what her sister was talking about. Amelia watched Freya go, her eyes falling on the Doctor. He was probably up for the same reason she sister was. She just yawned and lay back down, closing her eyes. "Mia! Mia! Look!" Freya ran back into the room with the cup, causing River to stir a bit, but not fully wake.

"Freya, we have to be quiet." He reminded her, scooping her up in his arms. "Amelia's gone back to sleep."

"But I brought the present." She pouted, holding it up so he could see.

"And it's beautiful." He looked at the clay cup covered in glitter, plastic jewels, beads, and macaroni as neatly as a four year old could make it. "But it's very early in the morning. We can put it next you the other present for mummy, but then you have to get back to sleep.

She continued to pout, "But I want to help."

"You've already helped lots. Plus, your mother would be very cross with me if I let you come with me to get her present."

She finally agreed to go back to sleep, "Can you wake me up before you wake up Mummy?"

He nodded. "Yes. And you can help me wake her up." He tucked her back under the covers. She nodded, closing her eyes and trying to fall back to sleep. He let out a breath of relief that River had stayed sleeping. Glancing at his watch, he saw that he was already late. Jack would be waiting. River was still exhausted from the events of the past few days, she didn't even wake at the movement of the TARDIS, though it was very subtle. The TARDIS landed without so much as a thud. The sun was just a sliver on the horizon when the Doctor stepped out. "Ah, Jack! I'm not too late am I?"

* * *

Jack, Ianto, and the Doctor reentered the TARDIS after a couple of hours of shopping for River's present. They stepped back into the bedroom, the Doctor smiling and Jack simply amazed that the Doctor had children. "Freya." The Doctor whispered, tapping her shoulder. "Time to wake up, honey."

She yawned and blinked up at him for a moment, "Daddy?" She mumbled sleepily, "Is it time to wake Mumma up?"

He nodded. "Why don't we wake your sister up so she can help, too."

She nodded and shook Amelia arm again, "Mia...Mia we have to wake up Mummy." Amelia sat up and tugged her arm away from Freya, getting pretty upset that she kept waking her up. Though her expression soften when she processed what Freya had said.

"Oh. 'm k. Who are they?" She pointed to the men with her father.

"Are those your friends?" Freya asked.

"Yes. Er, Jack, Ianto. These are my daughters. Freya and Amelia." The nodded and waved a hello, taking note of how much they looked like him and River. River was already starting to wake due to all the talking and noise in the room. "Freya, you'd better wake mummy now." He urged, seeing that she wouldn't get the chance to if they waited for much longer.

She was already bursting with excitement, "Mummy! Mummy! Wake up!" She bounced on the bed around her, landing ontop of her and drawing a groan from River. Jack couldn't suppress a chuckle at River's wild beheaded hair.

"I'm awake, I'm awake. Be gentle, my love." She murmured as Freya pounced on top of her yet again.

"Happy Mother's Day!" Amelia and Freya said together. Amelia sat closer to her legs. "Look what we made you!"

"Oh, they're beautiful!" She smiled, taking the cup and the picture off of the nightstand. "I love them."

They beamed "See? There's you. An' there's daddy, and that's Mia and me." Freya showed River.

"Yes I see." She smiled, kissing her forehead, "Thank you." Freya gave her a proud smile. The Doctor stepped up to River's bedside as it was his turn to giver her a gift. He set a gift bag in front of her, the name of the store, Talia's Armory, printed on the front.

"I got Jack's help with this one." He rubbed the back of his head. "He's better with guns than I am."

She stared at him for a moment, "You got me a gun?"

"You love guns. Plus your other ones never seem to be on you when you need them." He defended, biting his lip nervously, hoping she'd be pleased with it. He had never been to good with getting people things. "I thought you'd like it. I even had your name engraved on it."

"Oh, no sweetie I love it." She whispered, stroking his cheek. "It's such a thoughtful gift. I just didn't expect it, I thought you hated guns."

"I dont _hate_ them. I just... strongly advise against using them." He said on a matter of fact tone, giving her a kiss and smiling. "Happy Mother's Day."

"Thank you." She murmured against his lips. She finally noticed Jack and Ianto in the doorway.

Jack had his usual seductive smile on mixed with a 'long time no see' and 'wow' expression. "The Doctor kissing a woman. Volentaritly. Now that's something I never thought I'd see."

"Well I'm not just any woman. You should know that by now." Her smile matching his, equally as flirty and seductive.

"Could never forget it." The Doctor looked between the two, debating weather or not to tell Jack to stop it but decided against it since it was River's special day. "How long has it been since the betrothal?" Jack continued. The last he saw River was when the princess of Kodachi was crowned Empress.

She smiled even more. "It's complicated."

He raised an eyebrow. "Complicated, huh? Well luckily for you, you're talking to some one who does 'complicated' for a living. Come on, tell me. I'm sure I can keep up."

"Uncle Jack can will you dance with me? Daddy gave me lessons so I'd know how!" Freya interrupted. He would've came up with a whitey comment like 'buy me dinner first' but restrained himself. She was only four and he had a feeling that if he said something like that, River would be testing out her new gun.

He nodded. "You guys got any music?" River was both surprised and greatful that he hadn't said anything he usually would have. She pulled herself out of bed, turning on the music. It was a popular motown song: My guy, by Mary Wells. Jack was there when the song came out, so he knew it quite well. He hummed along to it as Freya balanced on his feet.

"Daddy will you dance with me?" Amelia asked, too shy to ask Ianto to dance. He smiled.

"Sure, darling." He picked her up like River did the previous night and started moving in beat with the song.

Freya looked over at the two of them. "No Mia, let Mummy dance with Daddy. You dance with Daddy's other friend." She instructed, forgetting how to pronounce Ianto's name. Amelia hung to the Doctor a little tighter, not really wanting to dance with Ianto, but she decided he looked friendly enough. The Doctor handed Amelia off to Ianto who took her a bit awkwardly, but smiled at her.

The Doctor then went to offer a hand to River. River smiled, taking his hand and getting up to dance with him. "Enjoying Mother's Day?" He said into her ear as the swayed to the music.

She smiled, "It's wonderful, _especially_ since Jack's here." She teased, knowing it would push his buttons.

"Oi, River!" He frowned. "I'll have you know, I could've made things just as special _without _Jack here."

Laughing, she purred in his ear, "Can you prove it?" She nipped his earlobe lightly. A blush slowly crept up his neck.

"River... we have company."

"I guess we'll just have to wait until later then." She murmured, her breath hot on his neck.

He was almost sure that he was the reddest thing in the room at this point. But attempting to keep his cool, he responded with "Are you sure you'll be able to wait that long?"

"Hmm, I don't know...Can _you _wait that long." She nipped lightly at his jaw.

He suppressed an embarrassed squeak and managed to say. "...With motivation like that, I could do just about anything."

She smiled, "Really?" She nipped at his jaw again, loving how flustered he was getting.

"I..er" He fumbled over his words, praying Jack wouldn't notice. "Really."

She pushed her body further against his, "And what if I did this?" She asked, moaning quietly in his ear, making sure it was only loud enough for him to hear.

He wondered if he was the only one who noticed the increase in temperature in the room. Or maybe it was just him. "It's a good thing the babysitters are here then."

"Yes, it's a very good thing." She purred, kissing him deeply.

"It wouldn't be that big a deal." He said, slowly regaining control if his thoughts. "If we were to pop out for a bit, would it."

She shook her head, smiling, "I don't think so." He raised an eyebrow.

"After all that, you're still going to make me wait?"

"I'm pregnant and so my moods change quickly." She was still smiling and still very in the mood to leave, though she pretended not to be, "So if you want to go, convince me."

It was his turn to pepper a few kisses along her jaw. "River..." He whispered. "Sexy and irresistible River. I couldn't exaggerate how much I want you right now." She hummed, her eyes fluttering shut and her head tilting back just slightly. Half forgetting about the other people in the room, he continued. "I want my hands all over you. I want to touch every inch of your skin and hear you moan my name." She whimpered quietly, highly aroused by his words and practically ready to pounce on him, but not wanting him to stop just yet. "I want to run my tongue down your body. I want your juices to be dripping from my mouth when I kiss you. I want you to be gasping for breath when I make you come."

"W..We need to go, now." She breathed, her chest heaving slightly and she tugged him towards the door.

"Jack, River and I are going out for a bit. We'll be back soon... ish. Can you watch the girls for us?" He said behind him and shut the door before he even had a chance to answer.


	27. Lock the door

**CH 27**

River pulled him to her, kissing him thoroughly, "Where do we go? Their in our room..." She murmured.

The Doctor could hardly think through the haze desire for her clouding his mind. "I know a place." He said, kissing her again.

She pushed her body harder into his, "Take me there then." She moaned, eager to have his hands on her.

He pushed her against the wall. "We could at least make an attempt" He said between kisses. "To go further away from our guests."

She was already tugging at his shirt, "I think...I think leaving the room was a pretty...pretty good attempt." She murmured against his lips.

"But they'll hear us." He insisted, though he didn't make any effort to stop her. He undid his bow-tie and shrugged off his jacket. He finally pulled away from the kiss and took her hand. "Come on." She growled in frustration, but let him pull her along.

They raced down the hallway and took a left in to the Doctor's 'office'. He liked to call it that anyway. It was really more like an inventing room. There were a few desks along the walls, covered in tools, papers, and tinker toys. Next to that was a fireplace and a couch. The rest of the room was mostly shelves stuffed full with nick-knacks and various other things.

River hauled him over to the couch since the desks were much too messy. She reclined back on the couch, pulling him on top of her and wrapping her legs around his waist. He was already working on getting rid of their clothes, unbuttoning his shirt and hiking up her dress. She rolled her hips towards him, helping him rip off his shirt so she could place hungry kisses across his chest. He managed to get her dress over her head, immediately dis-guarding it on the floor. His hand moved to explore her skin, sliding over her small bump and up her curves. Her whole body was flushed and begging for his attention. Her teeth grazed his skin and she whimpered a bit more.

He finished removing all of their clothes so they were both completely naked, moving his hand down and started rubbing her clit, feeling that she was already wet. She ground her hips down against his hand, trying to get more friction as she moaned rather loudly. He slipped his tongue into her mouth, sweeping it across the roof. He moved his fingers inside her, going in and out at a steady pace. His spare hand was tangled in her mass of curls. She moaned into his mouth, still trying to roll hips harder into his hand. Her hands trailed down his back, her nails scratching his skin every so often. He moved a little faster, going knuckle deep and curling his fingers. "I need you River..."

"W-W...Well the-then you'd better...better h-h-hurry up." She managed to gasp out, struggling to concentrate on anything other than his fingers inside her, her nails clawing at his skin now. He slowed his movements and pulled his fingers out of her. He brought them up to his mouth and licked the juices off. She whimpered as she watched him, her chest heaving and her eyes dark with arousal.

He smirked, pressing their mouths together again as he lined himself up with her. She bit his lip a bit harder than she usually would have, 'punishing' him for torturing her. He groaned when she bit his lip, pushing his length into her. She moaned loudly, her nails sinking into the skin of his biceps as she clutched onto him. By now there were red marks all over the Doctor's back and arms. He didn't mind though. He trailed hip lips down River's neck and he started to move faster. She was struggling to hold herself together, the added pregnancy hormones making her body ten times more sensitive than normal. She rolled her hips up towards his, her moans filling the room, it was a good thing they had moved from where they originally were. "River..." He moaned her name adding to both of their arousal.

"Doctor..." She breathed, knowing she definitely wasn't going to last much longer. "Doctor...oh sweetie..." He grunted in response, growing closer to his release.

"If you ask me" He panted. "I'm doing a much better job," He moaned "at giving you a special Mother's Day than Jack is."

"Maybe..." She gasped, still managing to tease him.

"Maybe?" He was determined to turn that into a yes. "Can he make you feel like this?" He tilted her hips up so the angle allowed him to stroke against the spot he knew she loved. She was gasping and panting for breath already, now she was practically screaming, her whole body trembling as she clung to him. "I bet he couldn't even dream of doing that." He grinned. Their bodies started to glisten with sweat.

"I...I bet he c-could..." She panted, deciding that she wasn't finished teasing him.

He increased his speed and moved his head down to nibble at her neck, murmuring "I doubt it."

She couldn't hold on any longer, coming with a loud cry of his name, shaking and clutching him. He could feel her wall tighten and clench around him, causing him to follow her over the edge, groaning her name into her ear. "God..." She breathed, her chest heaving as she tried to catch her breath, "I need to get you jealous more often..."

"Does that mean I won? He teases breathlessly.

"Well, without Jack here, you wouldn't have cause to be jealous." She teased right back.

"He didn't even do any of the heavy lifting! All he did was show up." He pointed out.

She mock-gasped, hitting his arm, "Heavy lifting? What's that supposed to mean?"

"It's a figure of speech." He defended quickly. "I just meant that he didn't even do any of the actual work." That didn't sound quite right either.

She raised an eyebrow, "Now you're calling having sex with me work? Well isn't that _sweet._"

"I-what?-No! That's not what I meant either!" He sputtered.

"I think you should stop talking before you get yourself into even more trouble that you're already in." She advised, crossing her arms.

He nodded timidly in agreement. "...Sorry." Any pride he was feeling before about being better than Jack was gone.

She hummed in acknowledgement, "It's a good thing I love you, or else you'd be in some serious trouble."

"Especially with your new gun." He added, not sure if he was allowed to speak yet.

"Mm, yes especially with my new gun, which I love. And plus, I need the practice. I haven't shot anything in a while."

"I don't think shooting the father of your children and love of your life is the wisest idea. I mean, last time you did it, time broke."

"Well technically, time broke because I _wouldn't _shoot you. But that was before you called what we just did 'work.'"

"I'm sorry." He fidgeted with his bottom lip. "Fun. It was fun and very much enjoyable."

She smiled, "That's much better. You wouldn't want your _pregnant_ wife to be upset, now would you?"

"Never." He said, kissing her cheek. "I wouldn't want you to be upset even if you weren't pregnant."

"I would hope so." She smiled, glancing over at the fireplace, "Could we start a fire?"

"Getting cold already?" He asked, untangling himself from her.

She nodded, staying where she was on the couch, "Maybe you should warm me up again." She purred.

"I thought you wanted a fire. I can't do both at the same time."

She shrugged, "Which do you want first?"

"Let's start the fire first." He smiled, pushing himself off the couch.

She nodded, "Do you need my help?"

"Nah." He lit a match. "I don't want to make you get u- Ow!" He dropped the match and stuck his burned finger into his mouth.

"Oh! Sweetie..." She jumped up, quickly blowing out the match before anything could catch on fire, then going to check on him. "Let me see..." She murmured.

"No, I'm fine..." He said around his finger. "Really, it's fine."

"Let me see." She repeated, a bit sterner this time. He reluctantly pulled his finger out of his mouth with a slight grumble and held it out for River. She examined his finger, "It doesn't look that bad." She murmured.

"It still hurt." He complained, looking back at the dark fire place.

"Do you need me to kiss it better?" She asked, taking the matches from him and lighting the fire.

"Yes please." He said shyly. He know it wouldn't numb it, he just wanted the kiss. She obliged, kissing his finger softly before settling herself back on the couch. He scurried behind her, pulling a blanket over their bare bodies. She snuggled up against him, glad to have him, the blanket and the fire for warmth.

"How long do you think Jack will survive our children?"

"I'd say another hour at most."

He laughed, wondering what they might be up to. "I wouldn't be surprised to find him covered in makeup and in a pink dress when we get back."

She laughed as well, resting her head against his chest, "That would certainly be a sight to see."

"I'd need pictures." He wrapped his arms around her waist, cuddling close to her.

She rest her hand on her bump, looking up at him, "We need to start thinking about names..."

"Hmm... I liked Eliot. For a boy."

"I like that too..." She stayed quiet for a few minutes, "I was thinking, since Amelia was named after my mother, if we had a boy we could name him William...after my father."

"I love it." He kissed the side of her head. "What if it's a girl? I like Talia. Or Phoebe." He suggested.

She nodded, "Those are nice." She thought for a few minutes, tracing patterns on his chest, "What was your mother's name?"

"She went by Terra, but that wasn't her real name. Sort of like the way I go by the Doctor." He told her.

She nodded, "What was she like?" She asked softly, "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to."

He sighed, thinking back. "It's been quite along time since I've seen her... I don't remember too much. She was an excellent cook, but she wasn't around much. She was on the high council of Gallafrey and when she wasn't working on that she was out trying to escape the pressures of her life. She didn't have a lot of time for me, but she managed to be home every night to tuck me into bed."

"I'm sure she loved you very much." She whispered, kissing his shoulder.

"I know. She sacrificed a lot for me and I..." He trailed off.

"It's alright." She murmured, not pressuring him to continue.

He changed the subject, trying to brush away the sad feeling. "You know, we didn't have a mother's day on Gallafrey. It was just always costom to be respectful to a mother. In fact, once you had kids, you automatically gained a higher status."

"Really? That's very interesting." She kissed him again, knowing that she had made him upset and trying to make it up to him.

He managed a smile. "You'd have a pretty high status, actually. People usually only had one kid. Twins were very rare let alone having a third."

She laughed, "Oh my...a third. I can't believe we're having another one."

"I can believe it alright." His hand drifted down towards her small bump. "But it's certainly a surprise."

She nodded in agreement, "We never really talked about having a third baby."

"I can't image it would be much different from the last time." He pointed out.

"Probably not." She murmured, rubbing her belly absent-mindedly.

"Well then I guess there's not much to talk about. Aside the planning, I mean. We're stopping at three, right?"

"I don't think I can handle any more than three." She smiled weakly, "To be completely honest, I don't if I can even handle three."

"I'm sure we'll be able to handle three. Freya and Amelia were tricky because they were two at once. But it's just one infant this time."

"Yes, one infant, but two messy, loud, energetic toddlers in addition to that." She noted, looking at the fire.

"I think Jack will be around more often than we think." He said, mind beginning to wander.

The sound of giggly shrikes could be heard coming down the hall, drawing nearer and nearer. "Daddy! Mummy!"

The Doctor looked at River and then down at their bare bodies, then back up again, wide eyed. "Uh, River...?"

She clutched the blanket closer to her body, "_Please _tell me you locked the door."

"I-er-..." He scratched the back of his head, trying to remember.

She scrambled off the couch, picking up his clothes and tossing them to him. "Get dressed!"

"Right!" He began tugging on his pants as quickly as he could, fumbling over himself and flailing a bit. There was a knock at the door before it flew open, just after River finished zipping up her dress. The Doctor's bow tie was crooked and his suspenders at an angle. He sat down awkwardly, hoping no one would notice.

"Mummy! I thought you were supposed to tell us when we were playing hide-and-go-seek!" Freya said over the clunking noises from her sister. Amelia was behind her, moving as fast as her leg would allow her to go which was of course the source of the clunking. Jack and Ianto were in the doorway, panting and giving River and the Doctor a look that said 'we tried to stop them but I've never met a four year old who could run that fast'.

River scooped Freya up, kissing her cheeks, "We weren't hiding, my love. Mummy and Daddy just needed to talk about some things."

"Uncle Jack said you were playing hide-'n'-seek." Freya put her arms around River's neck.

"Did he? Well, I think he was a bit confused. I would never play hide-n'-seek without telling you."

Freya gave a confused look as to why her uncle would say something that wasn't true. "What were you guys talkin' about anyways?"

"We were talking about the baby." She answered, setting her back down on the ground.

"Like where you're gonna put it an' stuff?"

She nodded quickly, "Yes, exactly. Now, are you two hungry?" She asked, quickly changing the subject.

"I'm sorta hungry." Freya said.

"I'm really hungry." Amelia told her.

"I know a place that serves a really good grilled cheese." Jack piped up.

"Would you girls like grilled cheese?" They nodded, happily.

"Er, River." The Doctor came up behind her. and said in a low voice "Are you so sure they should be going out so soon after...?"

She visibly tensed, "We can't hide forever." She whispered, "They're going to have to go out again at some point, and why not do it now when we have two extra people watching them."

"...Alright, but bring your new gun." He agreed. The Silence would make great target practice for River if they showed their faces.

"Don't worry, I will." She murmured.

The nodded, clapping his hands together excitedly as if they didn't just have the conversation. "Alright. Uncle Jack's going to help you two get your shoes on. K?"

"Daddy I want _you_ to help me with me shoes." Amelia said, not enjoying being away from her parents.

"Uh.. Okay." He looked back at River as Amelia took his hand.

"I'll go get my things." River quickly left the room. He exhaled, but Jack pat him on the back as they went to retrieve the girl's shoes.

"Uncle Jack said he's going to take us to a planet full of candy!" Freya beamed, skipping alongside them. The Doctor gave Jack a look that was somewhere between appreciation and a glare.

"Why don't you two go pick out which shoes you want." Freya knew what she wanted to wear immediately, taking only a few minutes to retrieve her plastic dress-up heels.

"I want to wear these!"

"Oh, Freya... you can't where those out to lunch." He hated saying no to her.

She pouted, "But I want to!"

He bent down eye level to her. "Freya, you can't because..." He though for a moment. "We can't let on that you're a princess. Evil bandits might try to capture you."

"Like the ones that took Mia?" She asked, her eyes growing wide.

He was a little taken back by the question. "...Yes?" He said slowly. "Like the ones that took Amelia." As long as they were playing princess, he may as well make them aware that it was a potentially dangerous situation.

She suddenly burst into tears, throwing her arms around his neck, "I don't want them to take me away!" She sobbed.

"No they won't, shh, it's okay, they won't take you." He rubbed her back. River would surely kill him if she was in the room. "Freya, I promise they won't take you. Not as long as me and mummy are here. We'll protect you, And uncle Jack and Ianto will, too."

"I want Mumma!" She wailed, still terrified by what he said, "I want Mumma! I want Mumma! I want Mumma!"

"Okay, okay." He attempted to sooth her. He lifted her up, running his hand along her back. "I'll bring you to her, it's okay. Shh, it's okay." She was still sobbing against his shoulder, her nose running and her entire tiny body shaking. He wouldn't be surprised it River made him sleep on the couch tonight.

He knocked of their bedroom door. "River?"

She opened the door, "What is-" Her eyes immediately fell on the little girl sobbing in his arms, "What happened?" She asked, holding her arms out to take her.

He handed Freya to River. "I'm sorry-she wanted-I was trying to-I..." He took a breath realizing that he wasn't making any sense.

"Oh, Freya, sweetheart...it's alright." She kissed her forehead, humming softly to try and calm her. "What happened, hmm?"

"Well, she wanted to wear the dress up shoes. And I wouldn't let her, but she was getting upset about it so I told her it was because we couldn't let people know she was a princess or the bandits would get her and she asked if it was the same 'bandits' who took Amelia and I said yes." He said all in one breath.

She glared at him, "Why would you tell her something like that?" She rubbed Freya's back, still trying her best to sooth Freya.

"I don't-I didn't mean to-I just thought-" He shut his mouth again to keep all the words from spilling out at once.

River turned her attention back to Freya who was still a mess in her arms. "Don't let them get me, mummy." She whimpered.

"I didn't want to lie to her." He began. "And I didn't think she'd make that sort of connection to the Silence."

She kissed Freya's forehead, "Don't worry, sweetheart. Nobody's going to get you." She whispered, still glaring at her husband. Freya clutched onto River's shirt tighter.

The Doctor looked at his feet. "I'm sorry."

"Why don't you, Jack, and Ianto take Amelia out to get her grilled cheese. I'll stay here with Freya." River sighed, rocking her gently.

"Alright." He said quietly moving back to the door. He glanced back at them, feeling like a rather terrible father at the moment, before leaving.

"How about you and I take a nice nap, yeah?" River smiled, closing the door and carrying Freya over to the bed.

"Not tired." She whimpered. She was too afraid to close her eyes at the moment.

"Are you sure? There's nothing to be afraid of, the TARDIS is the safest place in the universe." River soothed, sitting them both down on the bed.

"But they got in here last time and took Mia. When the baby was making your belly hurt and you had to be in the cold pool or else. They got in. And the mean lady wanted to take _you _away."

River bit her lip, not knowing how to respond to what she had said. She held her a bit tighter, "I won't let them take you." She whispered, "They'll never, ever lay a finger on you."

"They got Mia." She countered, on the verge of more tears. "They took her for a long time. And they hurt her."

"And I am so, so sorry." She was nearing tears herself, blaming herself for what happened to Amelia, "I should have been better at protecting you two. But I promise that they will never take either of you again."

"What do they want with us, mummy? Why can't they just leave us alone?" Her voice was quiet and shaky.

"They don't like your Daddy." She whispered, rocking her gently, "And so they try and hurt us to hurt him."

"What if they skip us and take him? What if they take you or the baby? I don't want them to hurt daddy! I don't want them to hurt you or the baby!" Freya did have any more control over her tears anymore. They just fell freely as more and more scary thoughts filled her head.

River kissed the girl's head, rubbing her back in an effort to calm her down again. "Freya, Daddy and I have been running from them for a very long time. We know how to protect ourselves. They won't hurt him, and they won't hurt me or the baby." She lied, somewhat bothered by what Freya had said. Madame Kovarian had tried to take her just days before, they probably knew she was pregnant now and she knew that they would be an full offence right now…

"I'm scared mummy." Was all she could manage. "I'm really really scared."

River was going to _kill _her husband when he got back. "I know, darling. I know you are. There's nothing to be afraid of, I'll always be here to protect you." She continued to kiss her head, still rocking and rubbing her back.

"But what if you're not? You said the baby was making you tired, but in a really bad way. Sometimes when you sleep, I don't know if you'll wake up. What if you go away like granmum and grandad?"

She was honestly shocked. She had no idea that he daughter had been thinking that way. "The baby isn't going to hurt me. Yes, it's making me tired, but not tired enough not to wake up. I won't go away, I won't leave you." She assured.

"After Mia was taken and we almost found her, but didn't, and you got hurt, me and daddy were waiting for hours for you to wake up, I thought that you gonna be like that forever..." She shook with small sobs until her lungs burned and she sucked in a quick breath before continuing to cry.

The sound of Freya's sobs were breaking her heart. River tried to change the subject, hoping that if they stopped talking about what had happened, she may calm down, "Do you want to watch a movie with me? We can watch one of those Earth movies you like, the ones about the princesses. We could even have ice cream in the big movie room. Would you like that?"

Freya nodded slowly and rubbed at her red and puffy eyes. "Th-the princess w-with the bow and arrow and hair like yours." She liked that one. She mostly wanted to watch it because of the happy ending with when the mother turned human again.

"Alright." She lifted her up again, carrying her towards the door, "Let's go get our ice cream first, alright?"

" 'm k." She said, partially able to calm her voice. River brought her daughter to the kitchen, setting her down on the floor to go through the freezer. "What kind of ice cream would you like?"

"Chocolate. And croishe." She stayed close to her mother, preferring to hold on to her dress. River nodded, scooping out the ice cream for the two of them, adding extra whipped cream on Freya's since she knew how much she liked it. "...Mummy? Why did you take so long to come back from the Library?" Freya had been going through the events of the past few days in her head, landing on the night River had come home.

"Daddy told you, remember? My ship needed repairs." She answered, leading her towards the movie room.

"But you could stand. He had to lift you up." It didn't make sense to her.

"I was very tired, it was a long trip." She covered, helping her up onto the couch in front of the television and wrapping her in a blanket before handing her her ice cream.

"I've never seen you that tired before. Remember the time when that ...um..." Freya couldn't quite remember what to call a Sontaran. "That potato person was casing us? We ran for a really long time, but you didn't get that tired."

"The Sontarans? Yes, but I also wasn't carrying a baby then." She was thankful to be able to use that excuse as she turned on the movie.

"The baby makes you tired." She reminded herself, curling into River's side as the intro began, taking a large bite of ice cream and shivering at the temperature.

"Not so much at once, my love." River whispered, kissing the top of her head and holding her close. They snuggled together, putting their empty ice cream bowls on the ground when they were done. Freya began to become sleepy, but kept her eyes open the entire time. River wasn't paying much attention to the movie, more concerned about her daughter. She held her tightly, stroking back her hair as the movie neared the end. Freya started to relax further into the cushions. By the time the credits rolled, she was fast asleep.


	28. Say it again

**CH 28**

River was afraid that if she tried to move Freya, she would wake up, so she stayed with her on the couch, waiting for the others to get back. It was a good ten minutes after the movie ended before Jack and Ianto could be heard laughing about something as they re-entered the TARDIS.

"Hey River?" Jack's voice called.

River carefully scooted off the couch, opening the door, "In here." She called before going back over to Freya.

Jack was still snickering about the joke, but lowered his voice as he saw that Freya was asleep. "Looks like that was sorted out. Ianto and I were just heading out. We wanted to say bye, first. Oh, and the Doctor's with Amelia in her room. He got her a new toy and one for Freya too."

She nodded, smiling up at him, "Thank you for coming and spending sometime with them. We'd love to have you again soon, if you'd like."

"I'd love it. Those two are great and I never thought I'd love the name 'Uncle Jack so much.'' "

Thank you, Jack. They had lots of fun with you, and I got a very...memorable Mother's Day with you watching them." She smirked.

He smiled and gave her a two fingered salute. "See ya later, River."

"Goodbye, sweetie." She smiled back, watching as he and Ianto turned to go.

"Mummy...?" Freya half murmured as she stirred.

"Hmm?" River looked down at her, stroking back her curls.

"Was that Uncle Jack?" She yawned.

"Yes, it was. He came to say goodbye."

"But I didn't get to say bye!" Freya pouted.

"Well you were sleeping and I didn't want to wake you. He'll be back soon." River assured, "Daddy and Amelia are back, do you want to go see them?"

The girl nodded. "Did they save me any grilled cheese?"

"I don't know, sweetie. Let's go see." She lifted Freya up off the couch, blankets and all, carrying her back to her room.

"Hi, Freya!" Amelia said excited to know what her sister and mother had been up to without her. Coloring books and crayons were strewn over her bed which the Doctor sat on the end of. He avoided eye contact with River, assuming she was still angry with him.

River carefully set Freya down on the bed beside Amelia, glad to see that she joined in on the coloring almost immediately. She only glanced at the Doctor, not saying anything to him. They stayed there with them for a while, avoiding the elephant in the room. A few times it looked like he was going to say something, but then ended up complimenting their daughters' drawings.

"Mummy? When are we gonna go to the zoo?" Amelia asked. "You promised we would. "

"I think we should wait a few days." River sighed, leaning against the wall.

"But then we can, right? Can we bring Uncle Jack?" Freya nodded in agreement that they should invite Jack. They looked at River for an answer.

"If you want to invite him then you can, but he's a very busy man so he may not be able to come."

"Mummy." She laughed. "We live in a time machine. We can just bring him when he's not busy."

River simply nodded, her eyes fixed on the floor. The Doctor followed her gaze, absent mindedly, knowing that there must've been something more that was on her mind than just what had happened with Freya. He wanted -he needed- to talk to River about this. He needed her not to be furious; He need to explain himself. But he wasn't comfortable with leaving their daughters unsupervised and as far as he could tell, neither was River. She sat down on Freya's bed, watching as the girls continued to color. She was tired and upset, lost in the heaviness of her thoughts.

"River..." He finally said. "Why don't you take a nap? ...You look tired. I can watch them."

She shook her head, not wanting to leave them. "I'm fine." She murmured, her voice monotone.

"I..." She must've been more upset with him than he thought. "You sure?"

"Yes, I'm fine." She repeated, refusing to look at him.

"...Alright." He felt terrible enough as it was, but having River against him made him feel even worse. He hated to see her so cross. He was rubbish at apologies and and it had already failed the first time.

River stayed silent for another minute, staring at the floor, then asked, "Did you save any grilled cheese for Freya?"

He nodded. "I put it in the fridge." That was followed by more silence, with only the sound of crayon on paper. She nodded, fidgeting in the uncomfortable silence. Even Freya and Amelia began to notice it after a while.

They looked up at eachother and exchanged glances. "Mummy...? Is everything alright?"

"Yes." Her voice broke, and she took a deep breath, clearing her throat, "Everything's fine."

Amelia looked between her parents. "Are you mad at daddy?" She tried again, wanting a truthful answer. Or at least on that made more sense than that.

She sighed, putting her head in her hands, "Amelia, I really don't want to talk right now. Just go back to coloring."

"...Sorry" The girl said quietly, returning to her book. Rver bit her lip, closing her eyes trying to keep from tearing up.

"River..." The Doctor couldn't bear it. He reached out to touch her arm and offered any comfort he could. He was starting to put together in his head that it wasn't only Freya who was upset and scared by the Silence.

She didn't pull away, but she didn't lean into his touch either, "What?" She asked, her voice nearly inaudible.

"I'm really sorry about earlier…" He began, though she already knew that much. "...I'm here. No matter what, I'm here. You know that?"

She nodded slowly, "Yes, I know."

"Where are you? Where has mind wandered? Where have you gone that's so distant from your family?"

River shook her head, not wanting to talk in front of the girls, "I'm fine. I'm right here." She whispered. He moved his hand lower to entangle with hers and traced his thumb in lazy circles at first then in Gallafreyan: 'Safe'. She squeezed her eyes shut, finally turning and burying her face in his shoulder. He brought his other hand up to stroke her hair.

Amelia and Freya knew better than to ask what was wrong this time. They stayed put, watching their parents.

River's shoulders shook lightly, clutching onto him. "I-I'm s-sorry."

"It's okay. It's okay. You had every right to be cross with me." _And you have every right to be afraid of the Silence. _He rubbed her back soothingly. She shook her head in disagreement, still clutching his hand as though her life depended on it.

The wet tip of a marker make contact with the top of her foot. Amelia had managed to climb off the bed and get a green marker. She drew the word she saw her father trace earlier: 'safe' and smiled up at her. River looked down at the word on her foot, then smiled weakly at her daughter, drying away the few tears that rolled down her cheeks.

"That must've been why your ship needed repairs." Amelia concluded. "We forgot to write safe."

She nodded, "It must have been." Freya climbed down next to her sister, grabbing a bunch more markers and placing them in a pile on the floor. She began working on the other foot and soon their mother's feet were a rainbow of words like love, happy, and safe. They also added things like, family, baby, mum, and hugs.

River laughed, looking down at the words on her feet. "Now I think you're just trying to show off how good you are at writing in Gallifreyan." She teased.

"I've been practicing really hard!" Freya proudly grinned.

Amelia reached into her pocket. "Look." She pulled out a napkin that had been drawn all over in Gallifreyan. The Doctor's neat hand writing was next to the more sloppy had writing of Amelia copying the word. "Daddy taught me some new words while we were waiting for the food to come."

"Ooh yes, I see." River smiled, looking down at the napkin, "I'm glad to see you've been practicing." The Doctor placed a kiss on her cheek, holding her close.

"I want to learn more words, too!" Freya said jealously.

"We got to have special ice cream and watch a movie together instead, remember? I'll teach you some new words another time, alright?" She offered, leaning into the Doctor's side. Freya nodded, satisfied with the offer. Amelia didn't get jealous over the ice cream though since she had had a milkshake with her lunch. "It's getting a bit late, we should start cleaning all of this up." River got up to start putting away the markers when the TARDIS jolted forwards, knocking her to the floor.

"River!" The Doctor rushed over to her. "River, are you alright?"

She nodded, "Yes, I'm fine… What was that?" She asked, pushing herself off the floor and moving to make sure the girls were alright.

"I don't know..." His heart beat a little faster, anxious about what had gotten in to the TARDIS.

"Mummy, I hit my elbow!"

She carefully checked over her elbow, "Does it hurt a lot?" She asked, making sure it wasn't broken or bruised.

"It hit my funny bone." Freya complained not liking the odd feeling it gave her.

River kissed it, "The feeling will go away in a minute." She assured, standing up and taking the Doctor's hand just as there was a loud bang from the console room.

He flinched at the noise, moving protectively in front of River. "River..." He said quietly. "You wouldn't happen to have your guns on you...?" She nodded, taking her new gun out of the holster. He smiled just a tiny bit at how sexy she looked with her new gun. "Okay." He bent down to Freya and Amelia. "You two need to stay very quiet. Do you understand?" They nodded, Freya immediately reaching for the bottom of River's dress, clinging to her.

Tha banging came again, making it apparent that someone wanted _really _wanted to get in.

"Plan. We need a plan." He hit his hand against his head in an effort to make his brain work. "Get as far away from the control room as possible. I'm not taking any chances." River nodded, already ushering the girls out of the room and down the hall away from the console room. He gave her a quick kiss, promising to meet her there as soon as he knew what was going on. He went in the opposite direction, sonic at the ready as the girls scurried down the hall.

River ran with the girls down the hall to where a door had appeared. It was the door to the same room they had stayed not a day or two before. "Stay here, you'll be safe in here. I'll be back soon." She whispered kissing the tops of the heads before closing the door, waiting until it vanished again before running down the hall after the Doctor. "Doctor,I'm not letting you do this alone!"

"River, go back with the girls. You need to stay somewhere safe." He said even though he knew she wouldn't listen.

"Absolutely not. I'm staying with you." She insisted, taking hold of his hand.

He turned to face her, trying to think of something to convince her. "River, you're not just putting yourself in danger, you're putting our child at risk, too. And If you die again I'll never forgive myself. I still don't forgive myself for the last time and I couldn't bear it a second time. Our children can live without me but they can't live with out you. River, please." He begged.

"But _I _can't live without you." She whispered, "And our children can't live without you either, you're ridiculous if you think otherwise. I have to help you. I know how to keep myself safe. I'm not going back."

He his eyes shut at the sound of the TARDIS doors being ripped off their hinges, but squeezed her hand and pulled her face to his, kissing her. "Love you."

"I love you too." She whispered as the click of high heels could be heard coming closer to them.

He turned around, not realizing how tight he was holding her hand. "I think our problem would best be solved by not dying." He whispered, moving forwards as silently as he could. The lights flickered followed by a sickly sound made by the TARDIS. She nodded, her thoughts drifting to the girls, though she knew that the TARDIS would protect them till the very end.

"How many times are going to play this game before you give up, Melody?" Kovarians voice was close. "You know I'll win eventually."

River gripped onto the Doctor's hand even tighter than before if it was possible. She couldn't find her voice to respond. "Doctor. Dooooctoooor." Kovarian called out. "You may as well just tell me where you're hiding them. We're going to find your children either way." The TARDIS groaned in protest again as the lights dimmed further. "You hear that? That's your TARDIS. Dying."

"No!" River shouted, taking off down the hall, firing off her gun as she ran.

"River!" The Doctor ran after her. "River wait!"

Kovarian's cold laugh rang through the halls. "That's right Melody, shooting things will make _everything_ better."

"You won't hurt my daughters! I'll never let you touch my children again!" She screamed, running through the twisting corridors, trying to find the wretched woman.

"Are you so sure?" They could practically hear the grin in her voice. "Tick tock goes the clock, Melody. For your husband and your children. For you and everything you hold dear to you." River suddenly stopped short, the words sinking in. Horrible images filled her mind, one hand covering her belly, the grip on her gun slacking.

"River!" The Doctor practically ran into her. He was breathing hard. "River..." His eyes were wide as he took in every detail of River's expression and stance. She didn't respond, frozen in place, her gun clattering to the ground.

He cupped her face in his hands. "River, talk to me. Just look at me a calm down." She shook her head, pushing away from him and running towards the source of the voice, her gun still on the floor. "River!" He picked up her gun, unsure what to do with it, put it in his pocket before sprinting after her. "River, come back!" He ran after her not having the faintest idea of why she would run to Kovarian unarmed, but he knew it couldn't be good.

There was fire in her eyes as she ran through the halls. She wanted to strangle her, crush the woman with her bare hands. "You'll never get your hands on them, I'll make sure of it!"

Kovarian was standing in the hallway, which was now quite dark, in front of a blank wall. She tapped on it and it made a hollow sound. "Something tells me I found where your children are hiding." She smirked.

River stopped, glaring at her at the other members of the Silence that stood behind her, "Don't you dare..."

"What ever makes you think I won't?" Kovarian raised her arm, which was completely made of metal. The last time she was in the TARDIS, (when River was still pregnant with the girls), she had been led to a room full of fire. She had made it out, but with a few sacrifices including her arm. "The TARDIS is dying. That means this plaster wall is just plaster." She turned on her heel punching the wall and making a large dent.

"No!" River cried, running to the wall earning several hits of electricity in the process. She blocked the wall with her own body, shielding the little girls that she knew were inside, "Don't...please..." Kovarain's bionic arm came down again, hitting River in the gut.

"River! No!" The Doctor cried, trying to get to her, but being blocked by the Silence.

With the wind knocked out of her, River doubled over and she fell onto her hands and knees. She gasped for breath, clutching onto her stomach. "D-Don't...take my girls..." She whispered, once she had managed to somewhat catch her breath, "I-I'll g-go with...you...if you p-promise n-not to take them..."

Kovarian paused her arm in mid air and lowered it to River. She grabbed her by the collar and pulled her up the wall, holding her so her feet couldn't touch the ground "Say it again."

River swallowed, looking her in the eyes, and steadying her voice before speaking, "If you leave my family alone, I'll come with you." She glanced over at the Doctor, her heart breaking, "And I won't fight."

Her lips curled into a smile before she dropped her. "Stupid girl. You shouldn't make deals like that when you don't know what you're doing." The Silence picked her up, holding her arms securely.

"NO! River! Don't do this! River, please!"

"I'm sorry, Doctor." She whispered, refusing to cry, she had to stay strong, "There isn't any other way to save the girls." After the blow to her stomach, she didn't think the baby would survive for very long, almost positive that she would ultimately miscarry because of it. "Take care of them..."

"No! River!" He fought and kicked against the Silence as River was hauled off. Tears blurred his vision and his knees buckled as he sobbed uncontrollably and the Silence left. "River." Was all he could say through his crying. "River come back. Please. River..."

She blinked back tears, not fighting as she had promised. If going with the Silence meant that her family would be safe, then it was the best she could do. A few silent tears slipped down her cheeks as she thought about how happy her family had been just that morning. Her wonderful, loving husband who she was leaving behind, two beautiful little girls whom she would probably now never see again and a baby on the way that was mostly likely dying.

They exited the TARDIS to a base deep under the surface of whatever planet they were on. Soldiers, Silence, and other people bustled around the area, working on weapons or practicing combat. Kovarian nodded at one of the workers who pushed some controls on the wall. The TARDIS fell through a shoot that had appeared below it and Kovarian smirked again.

River let out a startled shout, trying to run towards the shoot the TARDIS had just fallen through, "What did you do?"

"Did you really think I was going to let your little family go that easily? Honestly, Melody, you are so naive." Kovarian turned her back to the hole in the floor. "They're in an incinerator by now. Burning." Each syllable was spat out harshly from her mouth intended so River would have a clear image of her family's death.

"No!" She screamed, fighting against the Silence holding her with all the strength she had. Tears burned in her eyes, her husband, her beautiful girls… burning. They couldn't be gone, it couldn't be the end…

"You shouldn't be so distraught, Melody. We're going to kill you too. Just as soon at that one is born." She pointed a sharp nailed finger towards River's abdomen. "You'll be of no use."

River shook her head, glaring at her through her tears, "You're not getting this baby." She hissed, spitting in her direction.

Kovarian laughed. "And how do you propose to stop me? You have nothing but your fists, not one of your allies knows that you're here, and your only escape just got incinerated. Don't forget who you're up against."

"Believe me, I'll find a way." At this point, her threats were empty. She had no idea how she was going to prevent Kovarian from getting her baby. She could only think about her family and all the promises that had just been broken.

Kovarain rolled her eyes at River, muttering "You're pathetic." She started walking down the hall, gesturing for the Silence who were holding River to follow. "Come Melody, we have work to do."


End file.
